


Memories

by dont_hate_me01



Category: NCIS
Genre: Child Abuse, Child Death, Explicit Language, M/M, Sexual Violence, Violence, child pornography
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-11
Updated: 2015-10-11
Packaged: 2018-04-25 22:57:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 12
Words: 64,949
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4979860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dont_hate_me01/pseuds/dont_hate_me01
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A hunt for a serial pedophile takes Tony undercover to the most dangerous operation he's ever done. When he goes missing it's up to his team to find him. Will they be on time? Will Tony survive the memories of the past and the present, as old wounds gets entwined with new ones?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Written for this year's NCIS Big Bang 2015 over on LJ. A huge thank you to my wonderful artist, Penumbria who's work decorates this fic. My beta, AmyH0127, thank you for doing such a fantastic job with this one!

[ ](https://imgur.com/Pq8L2sn)

**Prologue: July 2001**

Gibbs passed the paper towel to Tony in silence. Tony wiped his face before leaning heavily against the basin and then righting himself and finding Gibbs' gaze on him. “Sorry, Boss.” He lowered his head. 

The light tap against his head came as no surprise, but the lack of strength behind it did. “You know my rules about saying sorry, DiNozzo and in this instance you're not weak.” 

“Then why are you not puking your guts out?” Tony blushed as he lowered his head. “Sorry, I had no right to ask that of you.” 

Gibbs sighed. His hand itched to slap his young partner again, but he knew it would not work; not in this instance. “Because, unfortunately, I've seen this before.” Gibbs closed his eyes for a second, the body of the broken child filling his memory before he firmly pushed the image away. 

Tony shook his head. “I thought I'd seen everything, but this...” He couldn't find the words to complete his sentence. The fact that thirty minutes ago, he was covered in the blood of a seven year old that died in his arms darkened his mood. He wanted to rip something apart and if it wasn't for Gibbs he had a feeling he would've done just that. 

“I know, DiNozzo.” This time Gibbs slapped him on the shoulder. “You’re fine. Ready to catch this bastard?” 

Tony took a deep breath, opened the tap and slapped some water on his face before he took another towel and cleaned up again. “Ready, Boss.” 

Gibbs nodded and then turned around knowing that his partner would follow. 

[ ](https://imgur.com/XTPjQgX)

Three weeks later, Gibbs looked on with pride as Tony slapped the cuffs on the wrists of LCDR. Carmichael, a pedophile who had over a period of three years brutally raped, mangled and murdered six children of navy personnel that were placed under his care as a psychologist. He was sure this case would never cease to haunt him. He already planned to make sure Tony came over to his place for the night. He wanted to make sure the young man was all right. A few brandies and a good steak would be a start in getting Tony to let go of the nightmares that Gibbs knew would be troubling him as well. 

“We did it, Boss.” Tony smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes. Instead, he looked haunted. 

“You did it, Tony.” Gibbs rarely dished out praise, but in this instance, it was necessary. He would be writing a recommendation as well. He knew the medal would not take away the hurt and sorrow Tony felt, but it would show him how much his efforts were appreciated. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 1**

**NCIS Head Quarters: July 2015**

“DiNozzo,” Gibbs barked as he rounded the corner and saw his SFA hunkered before his drawers, not helping with the case they were working on. 

Tony heard Gibbs’ voice, but he couldn’t get the memories out of his head - not with what he had in his hands. He stared at the medal - not one of Gibbs’, but one of his own. It was the first one he received and the one that held a special place in his heart, even though it broke him into pieces every time he thought about _that_ case. 

Ben Matthews was seven years old when a man who he was supposed to have trusted abducted him. Carmichael was a child psychologist and was supposed to help Ben get over the death of his father, but instead he molested him, raped him, abducted him and finally killed him. They had reached the abandoned child and Tony held him in his arms as the young boy took his last breath, his little body too damaged to go on. It was the first pedophile case Tony worked on, but unfortunately not the last and up to a few days ago, he thought he would never see anything as bad as that in his life again. Unfortunately, he was wrong. 

“DiNozzo”, Gibbs barked again and then sighed when he saw what Tony had in his hand. He waited for Tony to lift his head before he spoke again. “My office.” He turned around and made his way to the elevator. The two women from admin moved away when they saw him approaching. As the doors opened, he stepped in and Tony stepped in two seconds later. The doors closed without a word spoken between them. Gibbs pressed the emergency button and as the cart jolted to a halt, he turned to face the man who worked alongside of him for the past fourteen years. 

“You gonna be all right?” Gibbs placed his hand on Tony’s shoulder, knowing Tony needed the physical contact right at that moment. 

Tony’s gaze stayed lowered for almost a minute before he lifted his head and looked Gibbs in the eye. “I had nightmares for months on end, Boss.” He swallowed hard. “We have to find the bastard, Gibbs.” 

“I made Emily a promise, Tony. We'll get him.” Gibbs couldn’t help but to think of fourteen-year-old Emily Fornell. Her best friend had been abducted almost two weeks prior. After a connection was discovered linking the abductions to Navy children whose parents were deployed, NCIS became involved. No connection had been made prior because it happened throughout different states. No more than one child was taken per state. Already the total stood at seven. 

Tony nodded his head. “I made her the same promise, but I'm scared, Gibbs. What if...?” 

Gibbs shook his head. “Don't even try to complete that sentence. We will find her. Whatever it takes, we will.” 

Tony blanched at his boss' words, but he nodded his head again. There was one thing they could do and he had a feeling Gibbs would be very angry with him when he used Gibbs’ last words against him, but the senior agent was right. They had to do whatever it took to get her back. He was not about to lose another child to a pedophile. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%201_zpsnmk5pwxb.jpg.html)

“NO.” Gibbs shook his head as he paced the room. “There’s no way in hell that I will allow that, so just forget it.” 

“It’s not your decision, Gibbs.” Director Vance spoke up from behind his desk. 

“The hell it's not.” Gibbs snarled. He turned and faced the one person who remained quiet the whole time. “Are you forced to do this?” 

Tony shook his head even as Vance started to object to Gibbs’ insinuation. “It was my plan, Gibbs.” He lowered his head as the man that meant the world to him actually growled. However, he knew he couldn’t step down; not from this. Tony raised his head and found Gibbs’ blue eyes threatening to look right into his soul. “We don’t have any other choice; it needs to be done this way.” 

Gibbs shook his head, even as his mind tried telling him that DiNozzo was correct, that it was the only way. “Why you? Why not someone else?” 

The snort that escaped from Tony made Vance wonder if they were indeed doing the right thing, but he kept silent as DiNozzo spoke up again. “You know there’s no one else that can pull this off, Boss. It has to be me.” 

Gibbs pulled out one of the chairs around the conference table and sat down heavily. He remained quiet as he tried to think things through in his mind. He was unaware of the fact that Vance tried to speak up twice; both times Tony silenced him with a glare. After what felt like an hour, he slowly nodded his head. He looked at his hands as he broke the silence. “You will stay in contact with us at all times. If we do not hear from you each day I will personally come and haul your ass out of there.” 

Tony took the seat across from Gibbs and waited for Vance to take a seat as well before he addressed Gibbs’ demand. “You know that’s not practical, Gibbs. Especially not in the beginning.” Tony kept on talking when Gibbs wanted to interrupt. “I’m a big boy, Gibbs. I can handle myself. I will make contact with you whenever I can and we can have a code word that will get me out within the hour if the need arises. But, other than that, there’s nothing else we can do, not if we want to stop this.” 

Gibbs looked at his second in command and then at his director. Both men looked stubbornly at him. They were not about to budge on this and he knew Tony was right. “Okay, we do it your way.” Gibbs stood up and walked around to where Tony was seated and pulled the taller man out of his seat. “But, if you get yourself killed, I will personally bring you back to life and kill you myself. Is that understood?” 

“Crystal clear, Boss.” Tony grinned, but the knot in his stomach pulled tighter. He was about to embark on one of the most dangerous undercover missions he’s ever done, and this time he was going under without Gibbs on his six. It was going to be torture, but it had to be done. 

“Good. Let's get this planned.” Gibbs turned around and exited Vance’s office, making the other two jump to follow on his heels. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%201_zpsnmk5pwxb.jpg.html)

**NCIS Headquarters: Two days later**

“You promised, Uncle Gibbs, you promised!” Fourteen-year-old Emily Fornell yelled as tears streaked her cheeks. She turned and buried her face in her father's chest. 

Fornell looked dumbstruck at his best friend and couldn’t help but to sigh in frustration. They’d done all that they could, but they were too late. That morning the body of fourteen-year-old Angelina Bernard was found. She was raped, her body mutilated and she was strangled to death. The person responsible for taking her and ending her life was still out there. They had no idea who he was or how to catch him. For a moment, he felt resentment towards Gibbs and his team. They made his girl a promise - a promise they didn’t keep. But, he also knew they did everything in their power to find that bastard, but their time had run out and Angelina paid the ultimate price. He looked up as Tony got up from his desk and made his way past the rest of the team. Tobias could see the guilt that rolled off DiNozzo’s shoulders and he wanted to call out to the agent that it wasn’t his fault, but the words wouldn’t pass his lips. Inside, he knew they held no blame, but he felt the sobs that shook the body of his teenage daughter and for that moment, he needed to blame someone, even if it was just for that moment. 

Gibbs stared at Emily as she sobbed against Tobias’ shirt. He wanted nothing more than to reach out and tell her how sorry he was, but he knew that’s not what she wanted to hear so he stayed put and let Fornell calm her down. When Tony got up, he frowned as he saw the look of guilt that marked his features. He should’ve known Tony would feel guilty about this and knew that other than with Emily he could do something about this. He left McGee and Bishop with Fornell and Emily and went after Tony. He wasn’t surprised to find his second in command on the roof. 

Tony spoke up the moment he came into hearing distance. “I know you’re going to say it’s not my fault, Boss and that there was nothing more we could’ve done, but I still feel that we could’ve done more.” He dragged his hand through his hair, making it stand up in little spikes. “We need to catch this bastard, Gibbs. Now even more than before.” 

Gibbs walked up to Tony and slapped him on the back of the head, but instead of removing his hand, he kept it there, stroking Tony’s hair. “That was for the guilt that you're feeling.” He shifted so that he stood right next to Tony and pulled Tony's head to his shoulder. “Abby found a lead on the last link we received. It came back from the same place as the others.” 

“Leavenworth.” Tony whispered the name. 

Gibbs only nodded his head and waited for Tony to respond further. 

“Then I think it’s time we do this.” Tony finally moved away, straightening his tie and styling his hair with his fingers. “We might be too late for Angelina, but there are still other children out there that we can save.” 

“Keep yourself safe, Tony. Watch your six.” Gibbs whispered the words even as Tony walked away. He couldn’t help but to shiver, his gut churned hard at what was to come. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%201_zpsnmk5pwxb.jpg.html)

_**Disgraced NCIS agent sentenced to two years imprisonment** _

_Former NCIS agent, Anthony DiNozzo was sentenced to twenty-four months imprisonment on charges of possession of child pornography. This sentence comes after he pleaded guilty to the charges against him a month ago. It is expected that DiNozzo will serve out his sentence in Leavenworth penitentiary._

Gibbs threw the newspaper to the side and slammed down the receiver of the phone on his desk as it continued ringing. He didn’t look at McGee or Bishop as he got to his feet and stormed out of the bullpen. He needed coffee and he wasn't going to find it there. 

"Will he be okay?” Bishop asked as Gibbs stormed off. 

McGee shook his head. "None of us will be okay, not until this is done.” His eyes landed on the empty desk next to him. All of Tony’s stuff had been removed. The desk was an empty reminder of a man that was now on his own until they finally found what they were looking for. What he hated more was the fact that, except for their team, the DA, the Director and Fornell no one else knew that Tony was undercover. To the rest of the NCIS and the world out there, Tony DiNozzo was now a convicted criminal. One, who harmed children and deserved to rot in hell. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%201_zpsnmk5pwxb.jpg.html)

Tony swallowed hard as the cell door slammed shut behind him. From now on he was on his own. Already one or two of the men noticed him and moved in his direction. “Hello, boys.” He greeted them with a grin and sauntered deeper into the communal holding cell. He had a long debate with himself on which persona he would use inside. Either he could be a shy, timid sleazy ass who would be picked on and bullied and tried to be taken as a prison bitch within his first hour, or he could go in as an arrogant prick. He decided on the latter. Tony knew they would still try to take him down, but he hoped with the attitude he was projecting he would be able to buy himself a few hours, or hopefully a few days respite. 

“Pretty boy, aren’t you.” A man spoke up behind him and Tony tried not to jump with nerves. He didn’t even hear the man as he stepped up behind him. Already he could hear Gibbs growling in his ear at the rookie mistake. He was supposed to be aware of what was going on around him at all times. 

Tony turned at nearly did a double take. The man could only be described as enormous. He was well over the six foot tall and to Tony he looked at least three feet wide. He knew that he, together with Gibbs wouldn’t have been able to circle the man's waist even if they tried. It was only due to his years of working undercover that he managed to keep a straight face. “The last man who called me pretty is still looking for his balls, so fuck off.” He sneered as he looked the man up and down in distaste. 

The men closest to them snickered, but the mountain man himself actually bared his teeth and growled. For a moment Tony wondered if he was about to take his final breath when someone else spoke up. “Leave him be, Garry. He makes me laugh.” Silence had fallen over the cell as the man spoke up and Tony turned to look for the man who might have just saved his skin. 

His eyes landed on a skinny guy, long black dreadlocks decorated his face, while he sported a gray goatee. When Tony went through all of the mugshots of the different _leaders_ inside Leavenworth, he couldn’t believe when he saw the mugshot of the man before him. It was hard to believe that this skinny guy might be someone important. Nevertheless, it was clear that this thin man was one of the leaders and by the number of muscle men standing around, an important one. Tony knew his next move needed to be an important one. He cocked his head to the side. “Not enough clowns around here already?” He stayed where he was. 

Daniel Liston barked out laughing. “What are you in for?” 

Tony looked around him, making a show of it before he faced the scrawny man again. “Would you believe me if I told you I was framed?” 

Liston shook his head. “No, your whole demeanor screams badass. You were not framed.” 

Tony shrugged his shoulders and took a step forward. He was not surprised when a few of the men that surrounded the skinny guy growled and took a step towards him. He stared at them, but didn’t move back. He knew he was pissing them off, but to back up now would mean making life difficult for him in the end. “It was worth a try.” 

Daniel smirked just as an alarm sounded through the area. “Keep yourself safe, we’ll talk again.” He stood up and walked away. His bodyguards formed a ring around him, making sure that none of the other inmates came close to him. A few of the men that trailed behind the group gave Tony a look, but no one touched him. Tony stayed rooted to the spot until he was the last man in the general holding cell. 

“Waiting for a written invitation, boy?” The guard at the door spoke up. 

Tony sneered at the guard and passed him without a word. Already his mind was working overtime on what he’d done and what he had to do next. He had to make sure he slept with his eyes open, because these cutthroats in here would not hesitate to slit his throat at the first opportunity they got. He had to get closer to Daniel. Tony knew who the man was, but he pushed it to the back of his mind. For his plan to work he had to fake ignorance - it was the only way he would survive. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%201_zpsnmk5pwxb.jpg.html)

Tony eyed his cellmate with distaste. He wanted to roll his eyes at the irony of the situation. It seemed like he drew the short straw when it came to being surrounded by normal size people. This guy was also larger and life, but not flabby at all, pure muscle. Tony looked him up and down. “Let me guess, murder. Your temper a bit short after all that steroids you used.” He knew it was not a good move to antagonize the locals, but it was part of his job. That, and in a way it made him feel a bit more secure. 

The man snorted. “Garry told me you think you’re funny. The boss might think you’re funny, but that won’t keep you safe. Especially not in this cell.” The man took a step forward and stood directly in Tony’s space. “Garry told me to keep an eye on you, he marked you as his bitch but he didn’t say anything about me not using your mouth.” A sneer appeared on the man’s face as he reached out and tried to force Tony to his knees. 

Tony knew he had to keep himself safe and he had to make sure the rest of the inmates knew he wasn’t one to play with. “Who says I won’t use your mouth.” He smiled, and in a move that would have even made Gibbs proud. Tony managed to reverse their positions and had the larger man pinned against the wall. “I’m not here to blow you or blow anyone else for that matter. I’m also no one's bitch. I will kill you if you touch me, and that’s a promise, not a threat.” He leaned closer, his arm pressing hard over his cellmate’s throat, robbing the man of the ability to breathe. Already his color changed to a dark red. Tony did not release the pressure on the man’s throat even when he started to gurgle and fight against Tony’s hold. Tony had to use all of his strength to keep the man there, but still he managed to place an expression of pure boredom on his face. “Leave me alone, and just maybe you’ll be able to complete your term here. Understood?” He brought up his knee with force and slammed it hard into the man’s groin. “Understood?” Tony asked again. 

His cellmate nodded frantically. His balls and cock ached from the blow while he couldn’t even take one breath. He knew he’d misjudged the new man; he would have to talk to Garry about him. They would have to be more careful, but first he had to breathe. He nodded again and as he was released, he was overcome with a coughing fit that left him in tears. He was wheezing hard. 

Tony looked at the man as he still struggled to breathe and shrugged his shoulders. “I might’ve damaged your hyoid bone. Maybe you should have it looked at.” He couldn’t be bothered, but he also didn’t want the guy to die. Tony slammed his hand against the cell bars and called for help. He had no idea what attitude the wardens, or officers as they were now known as, would take, but at least he could try. 

“What the fuck? You here for only a few hours and already you’re making a lot of noise. What do you want DiNozzo?” Officer Bradley yelled as he moved towards the cell Tony was in. 

“My cellmate seems to be having trouble breathing.” He put a light tremble in is voice as he indicated to the gasping man. 

Bradley looked alarmed at the bulk of the man that had indeed trouble breathing. “Open cell B84!” He shouted over his shoulder and reached for the radio clipped to his belt. “Need medical assistance, holding block B.” He turned to Tony. “Back up against the wall, on your knees, hands interlocked behind your head.” He waited for Tony to comply with his instructions before he moved into the cell. By that time, Tony’s cellmate was already on his knees, his hand around his throat still gasping for air. 

Tony stayed in position until his cellmate was removed and taken away. He stared at his feet the whole time until the door shut closed again and he was alone. Officer Bradley looked at him. “What happened?” 

Tony shrugged. “I think he misjudged himself with the height of the bunk bed, Sir and walked straight into the side of it. It left him breathless immediately and when I saw it, I called for help.” 

“Sylvester has been in this cell for the last five years, never before has he misjudged himself on the height of the beds, DiNozzo. If I find out you had something to do with this, I will have you in solitary confinement so quickly _you’ll_ gasp for air.” 

“I did nothing, Sir.” Tony shook his head and lowered his eyes again. 

“Good, let it stay that way.” 

Tony sighed in relief when the guard finally walked away. He looked at the two bunks and made himself comfortable on the bottom one. At least he had a bit of peace for the night. Hopefully by tomorrow they would keep their distance from him. But it didn’t mean he would be able to relax. Tony was well aware of the fact that he painted a huge target on his back, but it had to be done. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%201_zpsnmk5pwxb.jpg.html)

**Leavenworth Penitentiary: 3 weeks later**

Tony hissed as he brushed his hand over his busted side. The bandages placed on him by the infirmary helped little, but without it his healing ribs would have no support. He traced the thick scar over his right eye, the stitches got removed the day before last, but the scar would be a permanent reminder of what he had to endure. 

After the fight, he was taken up to see Head Warden McGillis and he had to beg the man not to report it to Gibbs. He knew his boss would pull him out immediately and it was something they couldn’t afford. Not with what Tony has done so far. He was sure he finally found a foothold into the syndicate that operated from the inside; he just had to push on. 

It was by mere good luck that Tony still had his _virtue_ intact. In short – he was no one’s bitch. He managed to fight off a few of the burly men whom he suspected worked more for Garry than for the man – Daniel Liston himself. He’d left one of them with a severe concussion, another with a broken nose and he knew a third one would never walk without a limp. Tony was also sure that Liston was his ticket to getting into the group he wanted, but it was slow going as not only did Liston not trust him, but Liston listened to Garry, more than he listened to anyone else and since Tony and Garry really disliked each other, things were a bit complicated. Tony also knew that he would have to make his move soon, time was running out. He hoped that what he’d asked for would come through the next visit. He grimaced at that thought. It would be the first time Gibbs saw him since he landed there and to say that his boss would be pissed to see him in the condition that he was in was putting it mildly. 

Taking a deep breath, Tony heaved himself up from his bunk bed and stood by the door ready to face another day. He was aware of the fact that Sylvester was behind him, but ignored the bigger man. They had a very good understanding between them. He didn’t bother Tony and Tony didn’t try to kill him. 

The metallic clang of the cell gates opening for the day made Tony square his shoulders before he stepped out. He nodded at a few of the men, greeted the officers with respect but in general ignored the rest of the inmates. Breakfast went down without a hitch and Tony made his way out to the recreation court where he played some ball and soaked up the sun while still keeping an eye on his own ass so as not to land in trouble. When the horn sounded for visiting hour Tony made his way back to the general holding cell and waited his turn to be called. He couldn’t help but to feel nervous. He missed his team, but he missed Gibbs the most. The man held a special place in his heart, one that Tony guarded profoundly, as he didn’t think Gibbs would ever feel the same about him. 

“DiNozzo, you’re up. Legal is in room four. You’ve got thirty five minutes.” The guard yelled out the info as Tony made his way past. He only nodded his head as he walked down the passage until he reached the correct door. He had to take a deep breath before he turned the handle and walked in. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%201_zpsnmk5pwxb.jpg.html)

Gibbs hated this. For the last three weeks, he had been worse than a bear with a sore tooth. He knew it and he couldn’t care less. Everyone at the office avoided him as if he had the plague. Even his team who knew what was going on tried to stay out of the way most of the time. He had Abby in tears, but he made it up to her by promising he would give Tony the letter she’d written to him. He knew Tony wouldn’t be able to keep it, but at least he’d know that his friends still stood behind him. 

He looked down at the folder he had in his hands. It had papers and legal jargon that had his head swimming, but it also obtained the info Tony had asked for. Gibbs grimaced as he thought about the request. He knew Tony wouldn’t have asked for something like that if it wasn’t totally necessary, but it still pained him to know what Tony had to do to keep up appearances. He wished they were done, but he always was a realist and practical. Tony would not gain the trust and acceptance of this group they were hunting within mere weeks. This really was a long-term undercover assignment, one Gibbs realized as they days went by would cost Tony a lot of himself but he would make sure he was there when Tony finally could rid himself of the persona he adopted while in here. 

Gibbs looked at the time. His appointment was for eleven and it was almost time. He took a deep breath and schooled his features as he opened the door to the allotted consultation room and stepped in. 

When the door opened on the other side, he looked up and couldn’t help but to scowl, but remained silent. He waited for the guard to leave before he finally spoke up. “What the hell, DiNozzo? Trying to get yourself killed already?” 

Tony grinned. “Good to see you too, Boss.” He took the seat across Gibbs gingerly and shrugged his shoulders when he found Gibbs staring at him. “It looks worse than what it is.” 

Gibbs cocked his head. “Who are you trying to convince here, Tony; me or you?” 

Tony only smiled and then cleared his throat. “You all right, Boss? Bishop and McProbie still alive and kicking? Abs okay? Ducky still full of stories and how’s Jimmy doing?” He had to know, he had to shift the attention from himself to those he missed. 

“They’re all good, Tony.” Gibbs wanted to ask how Tony was, but he’d seen the shift in Tony and knew the other man wouldn’t answer him truthfully even if he asked him directly. “Care to tell me what happened?” He asked as he looked at Tony’s healing face. By the way Tony carried himself when he walked him Gibbs wouldn’t have been surprised if he had some bruised, even some cracked ribs. 

For a moment Tony pondered on making a joke, but then decided against it. “Some of the guys around here don’t like it that I can take care of myself.” He kept it simple. 

“How many times did you have to do that?” Gibbs balled his fists. He knew by the simple statement exactly what Tony had meant. 

“Let’s make it a round total of five and leave it at that, Boss.” Tony lowered his head. This was harder than what he thought it would be. Seeing Gibbs made him realize just how alone he was. 

Gibbs huffed, but nodded in agreement. He pushed a stack of papers towards Tony. It was cleared by the prison warden himself and was classified as legal documents Tony required to work on for his appeal case. “Be careful with those.” 

Tony nodded his head, but knew it wouldn’t be possible. For what he had planned the info inside would have to become public, at least to some inmates if he wanted to get what he was after. He pushed the papers to the side. He wouldn’t look at them, not until it was the right time to do so. Tony focused on the man in front of him. “How’s the boat coming along?” 

Gibbs saw the question for what it was and leaned back in his chair. “It’s almost done, but I promised you that I’d wait for you to come back and show you how I get it out.” 

Tony smiled at the promise and relaxed. They continued on talking for a further twenty minutes before Gibbs pushed Abby’s letter towards Tony. “I know you can’t keep this with you, but I’ll give you a few minutes to read it.” They’ve decided even before Tony went in that he would not keep any sort of correspondence with him. It was just too dangerous; they couldn’t take the chance on getting his cover blown by something as innocent as a letter. 

Tony blanched when he recognized Abby’s handwriting and shook his head. “I don’t think I can, Boss.” 

“I told her it would be difficult for you, Tony and I know she would understand if you didn’t read it.” 

Tony heard Gibbs’ words, but he also heard the words not spoken, those that said it might be just what he needed and to give it a go. He nodded his head and unfolded the single sheet of paper. The words were simple, yet they held meaning to them and he smiled as he read it through. He folded it up and handed it back go Gibbs. “Thanks, Boss.” 

Gibbs nodded. He wouldn’t ask what the letter contained, but by the look on Tony’s face, it did him good. Finally, he stood up and got ready to leave. “Watch yourself, DiNozzo. I’ll see you soon.” 

Tony got to his feet as well. “Thanks, Boss.” He took a deep breath, schooled his features, then without looking at Gibbs again, opened the door, and stepped back into the shoes of a convicted man and not as the special agent that he was. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%201_zpsnmk5pwxb.jpg.html)

Different images flashed through his mind as he worked his cock. His hand was slick with spit and pre-cum he used as lube to bring himself off. He could feel his balls tightening as he chased his release and with a groan, he spilled his seed all over his hand, a drop or two landed on his chest, but the biggest mess was on the solitary image that was in front of him. He gasped as he heard someone behind him and tried to snatch the image up, but it was too late. Greedy hands got to it first and he swallowed hard. 

“It’s not what you think.” The words tumbled from his mouth in a hasty excuse. It didn’t matter that his trousers were still around his ankles, or that he was slick with his release, he only concentrated on the photo and the person who now held it in his hand. 

Liston cocked his head. “You’ve been lying to us.” He dragged his finger across the photo. 

“What do you think would’ve happened to me if I told you the truth?” 

“Is this your only interest?” His finger smeared the streaks of cum across the surface of the image. 

“The younger the better.” He swallowed hard. 

Liston grinned. “I knew there was something about you the first time I saw you.” 

“What do you want from me?” He finally managed to pull his trousers up. 

“Nothing much. If I get an itch, you can scratch it, and maybe I’ll even scratch some of your itches.” Liston brought the slick finger to his mouth and licked it clean. He smiled a dirty smile. 

“That’s it? Nothing more. You’re not going to rat me out?” 

“Why would I do that? Especially with our mutual tastes in the finer things in life.” Liston grabbed hold of his cock and squeezed it hard through his trousers. 

He looked long at the man in front of him. “Boys, girls or both?” 

Liston pushed his hands inside of his trousers before he spoke up again. “Both, but no older than nine. They are so innocent; you can smell it on their small bodies.” He tugged at this cock and shuddered as a wet spot appeared. “I’m keeping this.” 

“Only if you can get me something back that I would like.” He reached for the photo to snatch it back, but Liston was faster than he was. He looked on as the skinny man slipped it into his pocket. 

“I’ll get you something and even a bit more.” Liston licked his lips. 

“Like what?” 

Liston shrugged. “Some live action, perhaps.” 

He gaped at Liston’s words. “In here, how?” 

Liston shook his head. “Not for you to know, so don’t ask. But first I need to know I can trust you.” He placed his hand over the pocket where he placed the photo. “Bring me more of this, and I'll see what I can do for you.” 

He shook his head. “Why would you want more photos if you have access to live action, or are you yanking my chain?” 

“It's all about trust and at this stage you need to earn it.” Liston turned around to walk away. “My dick likes being scratched, so be in the rec area later, I’ll need you to scratch it for me”. He laughed as started to walk away. 

He lowered his head, but snapped it up when Liston spoke up again. 

“And, DiNozzo, if I ever find out that you’ve been setting me up, I’ll personally slit your throat.” This time he did walk away. 

Tony only had enough time to reach the toilet before he heaved hard. Tears streamed down his face as he thought about what he’d done and what he still had to do. It was hard to keep the memories of the past at bay. He couldn’t afford to think about what had happened all those years ago. The last time he thought about that was ten years back, it nearly took him out that time; it would have if wasn’t for Gibbs. Tony shook his head; he couldn’t let that happen – especially not now. Tony stayed down on his knees for a long time before he finally got up and made it back to his cell. He didn’t have much time left. He had to go and scratch Liston’s _itch_ , but he also had to let Gibbs know their plan had worked and that he needed more. Tony was grateful for one thing - a computer program created the image Liston now had and the images Tony would get for him, no real children were used when those child porn photos were taken. 


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 2**

**Leavenworth Penitentiary: 2 months later**

“I’ve got something special for you, Tony.” Liston grinned as he walked into the kitchen area where Tony was working. 

Tony placed the peeler on the table and dried his hands on his trousers. He grinned as he saw Liston holding out an envelope. “You got it? It’s the right thing this time, Liston?” 

“Oh, I’m sure. It’s what you’ve been describing to me the past weeks. It’s the one.” He pulled the envelope back when Tony tried to reach for it. “Not so fast, you owe me.” 

Tony looked around and seeing that the other inmates were all doing their own thing, he stepped into the smaller man’s personal space. “You want my ass, Daniel? Want me to put out for you?” He leaned in and brushed the dreadlocks that decorated the man’s face. “Show me what you’ve got and I’ll go on my knees right here and blow your mind.” Tony let his hand brush over Daniel’s crotch, the man hardening already at the idea. 

“Fuck,” Daniel hissed as Tony’s hand brushed against him and without thinking twice, he handed the envelope over. 

“Thank you”, Tony took the envelope and ripped it open. It was one of the seven missing boys they were looking for. The image inside sickened him, but he masked up and smiled, before he licked his lips. “You deserve this, Liston.” Tony pulled the man closer and sank to his knees, his fingers already pulling on Daniel’s trousers to lower them. Tony didn’t think about what he was to do, but just grabbed hold of Liston's junk and pumped it a few times with his hand before he licked at the head and then popped it into his mouth. Tony looked up and when he saw Daniel’s eyes closed, he closed his own and concentrated on getting it done. Over the past few months he had learned what Liston liked and how to get him off in record time. The way the smaller man trembled and his breath hitched made Tony aware that he was close, he redoubled his efforts and at the last second he let the cock pop free from his mouth and finished Liston off with his hands. When Liston slumped over, Tony wiped his hands clean on Liston’s shirt and pulled him in for a last kiss. “Thank you again.” He didn’t wait for a reply, but left the still trembling man standing there as he made his way out of the kitchen area. It was time to put the next part of his plan into operation. Tony gulped, he could feel himself going to pieces but he couldn’t let it happen. Voices from the past tried to speak up, but he pushed the memories down – hard. He had to concentrate. He never thought he’d get this far, but he had and it was time to ruffle a few feathers. He could only hope that what he was about to do didn’t hurt too much. He shivered when he thought of his next step and slipped the sharpened spoon from his sleeve as his target came into sight. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%205_zpsluzs8lrb.jpg.html)

Tony groaned as the bright lights threatened to rob him of his sight and he quickly closed his eyes again and swallowed hard. It was only when he tried to place a hand over his eyes when he realized he was shackled to the bed. “Fuck,” his throat felt raw. 

“You can say that again.” 

The voice sounded to his left and Tony turned his head and squinted in the harsh light. “Warden McGillis?” 

“The one and only. What were you thinking, son?” The man held a cup to Tony’s mouth and helped him to a few swallows of water. 

“I had no choice.” Tony groaned as he leaned back again. His whole body ached and by the way he struggled to breathe, he knew some of his ribs were cracked, if not broken. The headache he sported was indicative of a concussion. He didn’t even want to know what else was wrong with him, but he was sure it was much worse than the previous time. 

McGillis remained quiet for a long time before he spoke up. “You’ll be placed in solitary confinement for at least the next month, it may even be longer. I assume that’s what you wanted.” 

Tony groaned in reply. “Is he alive?” 

McGillis smirked. “He received a few stitches, will be stiff for a few days, but he’ll be all right. Your aim was very good.” 

Tony only nodded his head. “You got the sample you needed?” 

A light went up for McGillis and he couldn't help but to be impressed. “How did you know we needed a DNA sample?” 

“People talk.” Tony groaned as he tried to shift to get a better position on the bed. 

“You took a great risk. You could've been killed.” McGillis couldn’t help but to chastise the man that had been placed in his care in a very risky undercover operation. 

“I knew your guards would not let that happen.” Tony moaned as a sharp pain travelled through his chest. 

“Really?” McGillis shook his head. He decided not to inform Tony that the most damaged done to him came from his guards who decided to make him an example. They were already suspended and he would personally make sure that until Tony was released from prison, they did not lay eyes or hands on him again. “You'll spend the night here in the infirmary. You’ll be taken to your new cell tomorrow during the day.” 

“Yes, Sir.” Tony closed his eyes as the warden left his seat, but then called out again, looking at the head of prison. “Please give Gibbs, a message. Tell him I’ve seen Hooper. He’ll know what it means.” He closed his eyes and was dimly aware of someone near his bed, but the pain dragged him under and he gave in to the darkness that surrounded him. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%205_zpsluzs8lrb.jpg.html)

“I want him out and I want him out, now!” Gibbs hollered as he slammed Vance’s door shut. 

“Not your call, Gibbs.” Vance picked up a new toothpick and placed it in his mouth. He had tried to wean himself of the bad habit, but on days like this, all that kept him calm was the little piece of wood. 

“The hell it's not my call. He could’ve died. He nearly did die! I want him out.” Gibbs paced the floor. 

“He did not die, Gibbs. He’s fine and he managed to tell us we’re on the right track.” Vance's words made Gibbs realize that they couldn’t get Tony out now; they had to go on. 

“Exactly, what’s the damage?” Gibbs stepped around Vance’s table and retrieved the bottle of bourbon he knew the other man kept there. He took two glasses and filled each with a heavy shot. 

Vance looked on as his senior agent brought the drink to his lips before he spoke up. “Mild concussion. Three fractured ribs on the right side, two broken ones on the left. Bruised body and severely sprained knee. The same knee that was damaged in college.” 

“What happened?” Gibbs grimaced as he took another sip of the burning alcohol. 

“He attacked and managed to stab an inmate with a sharpened spoon. He was brought down by the guards after they decided to teach him a lesson on how not to stick his nose in matters that he had no concern over.” Vance explained and continued talking. “He managed to stab Victor Lemont. Already Warden McGillis, as well as the DA sent us a personal thank you note.” 

“Lemont is the guy who refuses to give a DNA sample on religious grounds.” Gibbs was impressed. By getting medical treatment, the DA could use the waste material used to treat Lemont and get their testing done that way. Lemont was suspected of killing a family of four and with his DNA now in the hands of the forensic experts he would finally get what he deserved - the death penalty. “What about Tony?” 

“He’s now in solitary confinement for the foreseeable future.” Vance sighed. “It’s what we wanted, Gibbs.” 

Gibbs sat down and lowered his head into his hands. “But not at the risk of Tony’s health, Leon”. He didn’t add that it wasn’t the first time Tony placed his health on the line; they both knew it, but it didn’t mean he had to like it. 

Vance could’ve asked how Tony would’ve managed to get himself into solitary confinement without taking a risk, but knew the question wouldn’t have been received well. Instead, he sighed and leaned back in his chair. “He's the best we have, Gibbs. He'll be all right.” 

Gibbs didn’t reply, he had no words to describe what was going on through his mind. The fact that his gut kept on turning made it nearly impossible to settle down. He grunted and got to his feet. “Keep me in the loop, Leon.” He didn’t wait for a reply, but made his way to the door, closing it softly behind him. 

Only when his senior agent left, Vance finally relaxed. “Shit”, he pulled the toothpick from his mouth and flicked it into the waste bin. He looked at the door and back at his phone before he finally picked it up and dialed a number he came to know by heart the last couple of months. He didn’t wait for Warden McGillis on the other side to answer properly but started talking immediately. “Are you sure he’ll be all right?” 

_“As sure as I can be with any person finding themselves in solitary confinement. That alone has its own challenges, but from what I've seen of him so far he'll survive.”_ McGillis answered even as he looked at the screen showing the inmate being lead to his six by eight cell. He grimaced as he saw how the man trembled with fatigue before he finally let himself lie down and tried to get his troubled breathing under control. He made a note on the file in front of him and handed it to his secretary, keeping quiet until she closed the door behind him, leaving him alone in his office. _“I spoke to him last night, Leon. He’s a bit worse for wear, but will heal. I don’t like placing people in the hole, but this is part of your plan, Leon. Surely, I don't need to remind you of that.”_

“It was not part of _my_ plan to get him nearly killed, Sam.” Leon took a deep breath. “Trust DiNozzo to get what the whole justice department wanted and at the same time getting himself where we wanted him to be without raising suspicion”. 

_“It worked, Leon. Ranger wouldn’t have accepted any other story. It was the only thing he could do given the circumstances. I promise to make sure he stays safe. I'll keep you up to date as often as I can.”_

“You do so, Sam.” Vance ended the call and reached out to open the single file that occupied his desk. The face of Ranger Preacher stared up at him. Vance was sure his parents had a weird sense of humor by naming their son in such a manner. The fifty-four year old Caucasian man was serving life in Leavenworth. He was convicted on six counts of murder, three counts of rape and thirty-six counts of sexual exploitation of children. Those charges included the manufacturing of child pornography, the possession, distribution and receipt of child pornography. NCIS also believed that Ranger was the mastermind behind the group that abducted Navy children with the purpose of exploiting them, before raping, torturing and killing them. If DiNozzo’s plan worked, he would become part of this group and NCIS would take them down from the inside. First, Tony had to survive his stint in prison. Leon closed the file and reached for the glass still on his desk. He had a feeling that he’d need a few of these before this operation came to an end. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%205_zpsluzs8lrb.jpg.html)

Tony shuffled from one post to the other, his mind blank except for the monotonous actions to make sure he placed one foot in front of the other. He hated his situation. It had been almost three weeks, and although his physical injuries were well on the mend, his mental state had him worried. In the beginning, the solitude didn’t bother him much, in fact, he felt totally at ease at being alone, not having to talk to anyone, just being himself. But even for someone like him, things were now becoming too much. The lights that were on 24-7, the fact that he had to stare at the same three walls and one steel door all day long was getting to him, and for the first time in his law enforcement career, he understood why solitary confinement was seen as a torture method; because that’s what it was - torture, and nothing else. 

He looked up and saw the man standing in front of him. For the past two weeks since Tony was finally able to walk without falling over he would find the man standing at that same post looking over the general exercise yard, deprived of any life at this time at night. It was after all nearly ten in the evening. Tony shuffled a few paces on before turning and looking out over the lighted area. “I know it’s none of my business, but what are you looking at?” 

The man turned and looked at him without saying a word and then looked back to stare at the empty space before him. Tony shrugged his shoulders and moved on. He didn’t notice the man turning his head and staring at him as he moved on. 

Preacher looked at the newest addition to the solitary section as the man walked away from him before he turned his eyes back to the empty yard in front of him. He repeated the man’s name in his mind before a grin appeared on his face. He wouldn’t engage with Tony DiNozzo, not for a while in any case, but things might change in the future, especially if he could believe the Intel that reached his ears. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%205_zpsluzs8lrb.jpg.html)

**Seven weeks in solitary confinement**

“You don’t smoke.” Ranger asked as he took a spot next to Tony. Both men once again stared out at the empty rec field in front of them. 

“Not good for your health.” Tony replied, but kept facing forward. 

“Are you then without any vices?” Preacher didn’t try to hide the curiosity in his voice, even though he already knew the answer. 

“If I was clean do you think I would land up in here?” Tony started walking, not bothering to see if the man would follow. 

Preacher grinned at the remark and pulled a cigarette from his pocket, lighting it up and taking a deep pull, filling his lungs with the much-needed nicotine. He didn’t care for the guards, they didn’t bother him, and well he – he didn’t bother them. The two men didn’t talk to one another again during their hour of freedom before they returned to their small cells. 

Tony frowned when the heavy door locked behind him and he pulled the brown envelope from his pocket, which Ranger had slipped into his hand without any of the guards noticing. As he had no way to preserve the potential evidence on it, he picked it up and opened it. It made his knees weak and he sat down heavily on the bed. He was aware of the camera in his cell, but couldn’t be bothered at the moment. Tony knew that from now on he had to tread very carefully, he might’ve finally gotten his foot in the door but he knew that now he was in even more danger than before. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%205_zpsluzs8lrb.jpg.html)

“You seemed more relaxed tonight.” Ranger made the remark as they stood at their usual spot. 

A lazy grin appeared on Tony’s face. “Had some great dreams last night.” He tried to keep his voice light. He had no dreams – he couldn’t afford to go to sleep. The image Ranger slipped to him was burned into his mind and it reminded him of himself. Tony felt himself slipping back into the past and he pushed the memories away. He had to concentrate on the man next to him. 

Ranger grunted in reply. “You were a federal agent.” Danger lurked in his voice. 

Tony snorted, but kept his face void of any expression. They knew inquiries would be made and Ranger might find out who he was. “The operative word there being ‘was’. All in the past.” He didn’t elaborate, knowing that if the other man wanted more, he’d asked for it. Tony burned to ask where he got the photo from, but knew it was too early. If he asked any questions now he would be as good as dead. 

“Why did you stab Lemont?” 

“To get in here.” Tony’s reply was immediate. 

“Mm,” Ranger nodded his head as if he was thinking hard before he turned and left Tony standing alone. Only when the man was a distance away did Tony release the breath he held. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%205_zpsluzs8lrb.jpg.html)

The mug shattered as it hit the wall, the dark brown coffee staining the cream wall instantly. Gibbs was aware that Ducky was behind him, but ignored him as he tried to get his breathing and his temper under control. 

“Why is he doing this, Ducky?” He finally asked as he turned to face his longtime friend. 

“I would say for self-preservation, Jethro. Tony has been under now for almost four months and from what he got to us, he is finally making headway. For him to _break_ out of character now, could cost him his life. We all know Tony is the best there is, but something as big as this must be very taxing on him. You know he would not have denied seeing you if it was not for the best. Trust him, Jethro. He knows what he is doing.” 

“I trust him, Duck, but I don’t trust the place he’s in, or the people he’s with.” Gibbs started to pick up the shards of ceramic that decorated the floor. He hated the fact that he couldn’t see Tony for himself, but it stung even more that Tony refused to see him. Ducky was telling the truth, Tony must be doing this out of self-preservation but it still didn’t make it right. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%205_zpsluzs8lrb.jpg.html)

Tony looked down at his shackled feet as he sat down waiting for Warden McGillis to come in. He was tired and couldn’t help but to wonder if he’d be able to complete this assignment. He’d been in solitary confinement now for four months, but knew he soon would be moved along with Ranger. The other man being finally released from his stint in _the hole_ after being there for almost eight months. Tony came to his feet as the door opened and the head of the penitentiary stepped in. 

“Have a seat, DiNozzo.” McGillis nodded for the guard to wait outside. He took a seat himself and only spoke up again when the door closed behind the guard. “How are you doing, son?” 

Tony remained silent. He had no idea how to answer that question. He was so deep undercover that even though he knew he could trust the man sitting across him, he still felt wary. 

Sam McGillis looked attentively at the man before him. The question to him was a fairly simple one, but he could see that Tony was struggling on how to answer it. He cleared his throat and continued talking. “You’ll be released from solitary tomorrow and will be placed back into the general population. However, due to your unacceptable behavior you’ve lost all privileges and will have to start out as a new inmate. Do you understand?” 

“Yes, Sir.” Tony nodded in agreement. He also understood that it meant that he and Ranger would most likely share a cell together or at least be within touching distance from one another in their new housing block. 

“Good”. McGillis reached over and picked up an envelope that he passed to Tony. “The envelope stays here.” He didn’t comment on whom it was from or what it contained, but he couldn’t help to notice the way Tony’s hands trembled as he opened the envelope and removed its contents. He looked on as the agent folded the pieces of paper that looked like it could’ve been photos and tucked it into his trouser pocket. Tony left the envelope on the table. 

McGillis stood up and walked towards the door. As he opened it up, he spoke again. “I hope this time around you’ve learned your lesson, son. Behavior like that will not be tolerated here.” He stood to the side and let Tony pass. 

“Yes, Sir. I understand.” Tony shuffled past and followed the guard back to the one place he would never miss. It was time to set the second last part of his plan into operation. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%205_zpsluzs8lrb.jpg.html)

“It’s the same boy as before.” Ranger spoke up and Tony nodded his head. He should’ve known that the deranged inmate knew about the photo Liston got hold of. 

“He’s my favorite.” 

“He doesn’t look older than ten.” 

Tony shook his head. “He’s eight.” 

“How long?” 

“He’s been groomed since the age of five by a very good friend of mine. I met him about six months prior to the shit hitting the fan for the first time.” Tony stroked the face of the innocent boy on the photo that looked up at the camera. 

“Those sweet lips.” Ranger took the photo from Tony’s hand and traced it with his fingers. 

Tony grinned. “He’s really talented.” 

Ranger barked out a laugh. “I can see that.” He handed the photo back. “He was not in the photos confiscated from you.” 

Tony took a deep breath and turned to face the man sitting next to him. “Why would I have photos when I had access to the real thing?” 

A light went up for Ranger and he looked impressed. “I assume he’s for sharing?” 

Tony’s eyes grew dark. “I have very specific tastes, him being one of them. I’m normally not very stingy, except with him. He belongs to me and my friend _only_.”

Ranger put up his hands. “I understand. Do you have others that you do share?” 

Tony shook his head. “After my arrest, my _friends_ broke all contact with me. I have nothing except him.” 

Preacher nodded his head slowly. “Maybe I could help you with some new friends.” 

Tony remained silent, waiting for the other man to talk further. 

“You’ll be out of here in what, three, four months? Correct?” 

“Four months.” Tony replied curtly. 

“Good, we’ll talk again.” Ranger stood up and walked away. 

Tony was finally in. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%205_zpsluzs8lrb.jpg.html)

“Boss?” McGee asked softly as Gibbs closed his phone, but remained seated without moving an inch. Receiving no reply, McGee tried again. “Boss, Gibbs?” 

“Tony's in.” Gibbs finally managed to speak. It was what they wanted, but he couldn't help but to feel unsettled about the whole situation. 

McGee swallowed hard at Gibbs’ words. “So what now, Boss?” 

“Now, McGee? Now we wait for Tony to survive the last stint of his sentence and then hope his cover stays intact for the next part of this operation.” Gibbs stood up from behind his desk. “I’m with the Director.” He didn’t wait for a reply, but took the stairs two at a time. 

McGee looked on as Gibbs disappeared. He knew he should let Abby know but for a moment, he couldn’t move. He always thought himself better than Tony in certain instances, but these past months had shown him just how much work Tony had done as Gibbs’ second in command and he came to respect Tony for being able to stay undercover for so long. He couldn’t help but to wonder just how long it would take Tony to recover from this mission, and how much he will have lost of himself because of what he had to do. He also couldn’t help but to wonder what the rest of the office would say when all of this was over. He couldn’t believe that some of their colleagues believed the rumors. He was also aware of the fact that Gibbs knew who those people wore. It wouldn’t come as a surprise if they sought employment elsewhere soon.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 3**

**One year and four months after commencement of sentence**

Tony shielded his eyes against the harsh sun as he took the final step that placed him outside Leavenworth Penitentiary and into the real world again. He looked at the small bag he clutched in his hand and could feel the weight of the few dollars he had in his pocket. He would’ve never thought that taking that first step after 487 days could be so hard. The street was empty as Tony made his way to the nearest bus station to get to his next destination. He had a number on a scrap of paper handed to him by Ranger with the words to call the number, but only at seven in the evening. The call wouldn’t be answered if he phoned before or after, in the meantime, he had nowhere to go. 

Tony didn’t have to wait long for a bus as he made his way to Kansas city, managed to find a cheap motel and with the little money he had left, he checked in to room where he took a long shower and then stretched out on the bed. It didn’t take long for Tony to start to shiver as his mind and body finally realized that he was out of that place. That he never had to share a communal shower with twenty other men or that he had to be on guard for twenty-four hours a day; for tonight, he could let his guard down. He would also only make contact with Gibbs when he knew what he had to do next. Tony dragged the threadbare cover over his body and closed his eyes. He could do with a few hours of sleep before he phoned the given number. Even as he shivered, he managed to settle into a light dose. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%204_zpsc8y7ovut.jpg.html)

“Gibbs”, he answered as he put away the file and switched off the desktop. He frowned when he was met with silence. “Gibbs,” he repeated. 

“Boss?” Tony’s voice sounded through the tiny speaker and Gibbs’ legs went weak. 

“Tony. Where are you?” 

Tony cleared his throat, but remained silent. 

“You all right?” Gibbs asked instead. 

“Fine”, Tony sighed. “I got released, Boss.” 

Several questions came to mind, but Gibbs knew that it wasn’t a good time to ask them. “What now?” 

“I got a number I have to call tonight at nineteen hundred.” He held the piece of paper in his hand, even though he’d already memorized the number by heart. 

“Want us to put a trace on it?” Gibbs grabbed a pen. 

“Please”, Tony recited the number quickly and then remained silent. 

Gibbs sighed. He hated not being able to be with Tony. The younger man needed someone to ground him yet instead he was all alone. “Watch your six, DiNozzo and remember you don’t have my permission.” 

Tony smiled. “I got it, Boss.” Without another word, he ended the call. 

Gibbs stared at his cell and then started to move. Even as he walked towards the elevator, he started to call McGee. It was time for his team to get back in. From now on, until Tony was back with them, they would be working non-stop. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%204_zpsc8y7ovut.jpg.html)

Tony frowned when he saw how shaky his hand was as he used the motel room’s phone to call the number he was given. He was surprised to find that the room still had a phone; many of the smaller motels got rid of them years ago, especially places like this one, which didn’t even offer room service. He found himself gripping the receiver hard and had to take some deep breaths to relax himself. The phone rang three times before someone answered. 

“Ranger Preacher said I should call, you have a job for me.” Tony stuck to the words he was instructed to say. He didn’t introduce himself or say where he was phoning. The person on the other side snorted, cleared his throat and then spit. Tony could hear it all and shivered at the thought. He remained quiet. 

“Call back tomorrow at five.” The connection ended before Tony could reply. He looked at the dead receiver and placed it back. Tony didn’t even bother to phone Gibbs back, he knew that the time was too short; they wouldn’t have been able to trace the call. All that they would be able to tell was where the phone was which he called. He knew it was a pay phone, he could hear the traffic in the background, it sounded like it was at a bus depot or train station. 

Tony looked at the time. It was two minutes past seven. He looked at the bed and then at the tiny bathroom off to his right. He decided to take another shower and then sleep. It wasn’t as if he had anything else to do. By quarter to eight, Tony was asleep. 

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**Two days later - Fire House Bar & Grill, Gardner, Kansas City**

Tony sat with his back against the wall. His position allowed him to have the back exit as well as the front door in sight. He was nursing a soft drink. At first, he wanted to order something stronger, but decided against it, as his body was no longer used to alcohol, not even beer. He could feel himself tense up as two large men entered the shady bar and looked around before the one on the left finally noticed Tony and indicated with his head in Tony’s direction. Tony spotted the concealed weapons that both of them carried underneath their heavy jackets easily. Tony tried to remain relaxed as the two men made their way over and took their places at the small table. 

“You a pussy?” The one who stood at the left when they entered spoke up first as he saw what Tony was drinking. 

“Not a bigger one than you,” Tony snapped back. 

“Take it easy, Zach.” The one on the right placed an arm across his friend’s chest keeping him down in his seat. 

The one called Zach growled and balled his fist as he looked Tony up and down. He finally looked away when he saw that Tony wasn’t intimidated by him. 

“You the Fed?” The unidentified man spoke again. 

“Ex-Fed.” Tony didn’t reach out to shake their hands. 

Zach growled again. “Once a Fed, always a Fed.” He snarled and then looked at his companion. “This is a mistake, Reggie.” 

Tony remained silent. He knew by Zach’s attitude that never mind what he said, the bigger man would find fault with it. 

Reggie shook his head. “The boss said he could be trusted, Zach.” 

“The boss isn’t here, Reggie. He’s locked up and out of circulation, what does he know?” Zach pushed his chair back and stood up. “You can deal with him, I’m not.” He left the two men seated at the table and made his way over to the bar. 

Tony looked on as Zach pushed a few of the patrons out of his way and eased himself onto a chair. “He’s not very friendly.” 

“Just because I’m still seated here doesn’t mean I don’t agree with him, but the boss told us to pick you up and that’s what we’re doing.” Reggie pulled out a single sheet and placed it in front of Tony. “Memorize this.” 

Tony looked down at the paper and noted that it was an address. “Why?” 

“Because your fairy godmother told you to.” Reggie grabbed the paper back. “Seems like you’re not interested in the job.” 

“148B Iron Street, Kansas City.” Tony repeated the address on the paper without blinking an eye. 

Reggie remained silent. “You don’t ask any questions, understand?” 

“And what if I don’t understand?” 

“Maybe I should just let Zach shoot you and get it over with.” Reggie stood to leave the table. 

“And what would Preacher say about that?” Tony leaned back and grinned. He knew he was acting cocky, but he had to. He looked on as Reggie straightened his back at Ranger’s name. 

“Then make sure you understand.” This time Reggie did stand up. “Be there in twelve hours.” He didn’t say anything else, just sauntered over to where Zach was drinking at clapped him on the shoulder. Zach threw a few bills on the counter top, abandoned the remainder of his beer and left with Reggie. Not once did any of them look back at Tony again. 

Tony waited ten minutes for them to leave before he got to his feet and exited the bar. He had to find somewhere to stay the night before heading to his destination in the morning. He also had to get to a library to use a computer to check up on the address he had to memorize. Tony wanted nothing more than to phone Gibbs and tell him about the address, but something told him not to – that this was a test; one that he couldn’t afford to fail. 

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**Kansas City**

Tony stood at the corner, his gaze locked on the building in front of him. 148B Iron Street turned out to be a large warehouse in the downtown area. From the information Tony could gather at the library, it belonged to a company that specialized in making of plastic cups. The company itself had gone bankrupt a few months back and the property was on the auction block, the sale in just a few weeks. It was supposed to be empty. 

Tony looked around and straightened as a dark SUV came slowly around the corner and crept towards him. He couldn’t help but to reach for his weapon, only to mentally slap himself; he had no firearm. Until these guys accepted him and maybe passed him a weapon or got him in contact with someone who could supply him with one, he only had his fists and the self-defense lessons Gibbs drilled into him to rely on. 

Finally, the vehicle came to a halt next to him and the tinted window lowered slowly. Tony plastered a smile on his face when he saw it was Reggie in the driver's seat. 

"Get in”, Reggie indicated with his head to the back door and closed the window again. The way he revved the engine made Tony realize that if he didn't get in quickly he wouldn't be going with them at all. 

Tony was still getting into the vehicle when Reggie pulled away. "In a hurry, much?" 

"Don’t have time to waste.” Reggie answered hurriedly, but kept his eye on the road. 

"I thought we were going in there.” Tony looked back as the warehouse disappeared behind them. 

"You thought wrong.” Reggie ignored him by turning on the radio. Tony decided to make himself comfortable and with a bit of time, maybe Reggie would talk to him some more. Tony quickly noticed that they were leaving the city limits and headed deeper into the countryside. 

“Can we stop somewhere so that I can buy a phone?” Tony spoke up but received no answer. “Okay, can I then at least use your phone?” 

This time Reggie huffed, but at least he answered. “No phones.” 

“Why the hell not? How do you stay in contact?” Tony frowned. 

“And there you thought you knew Preacher.” Reggie grinned. “The man doesn’t trust cell phones, so no phones.” 

“And how you do stay in touch with the man?” Tony wanted to scream out of frustration. 

“We stay in touch, don’t you worry.” Reggie turned the volume of the radio up, ignoring Tony again. 

They drove for what felt like at least another hour before Tony spoke up again. “Are we there yet?” Tony smiled as he asked the question, hoping to get a reply from the driver. 

Reggie frowned. “What are you, five?” 

“We’ll I’m treated like one, so I might as well act like one.” Tony decided against pouting, knowing not to take it too far. 

“Listen, we don’t know you and until you’ve earned our trust, we’re not going to tell you anything.” 

“And how am I going to prove myself if you don't tell me anything?” He counter asked quickly. 

“By shutting your trap and doing what you're told to do.” Reggie snapped. “I’m beginning to agree with Zach, you’re more trouble than anything else.” 

“And yet, Preacher told you to trust me.” 

Reggie sniffed. “Preacher said a lot of things - trusting you wasn’t one of them.” He reached to the side and opened the glove box. “Put this on.” He threw something over his shoulder. “Make sure it covers your eyes properly. I won’t hesitate to shoot you.” 

Tony frowned as he picked up the item and found it to be a sort of a balaclava, but without any openings. At first, he wanted to object, but then shrugged and pulled the thing over his head. It smelled stuffy and the scratchy material irritated his skin. “Satisfied?” His muffled voice sounded up through the thick layer. 

Reggie only grunted in reply and then went on to ignore Tony again. 

The dark material made it almost impossible for Tony to see where they were going so he counted quietly in his head as they drove on. He memorized the number of minutes to each turn they took and frowned when he realized that it’s been almost half an hour since he had to place the hood over his head. It didn’t feel like Reggie was going to stop soon. He was about to speak out when the SUV finally slowed down and after a further two minutes the big vehicle came to a halt. 

“Stay put”, Reggie ordered as he got out of the driver’s seat and slammed the door shut behind him. 

Not knowing where Reggie was going or who else might be around Tony had no choice but to leave the covering over his head. He was becoming thirsty and the musty smell of the hood made him want to sneeze badly. “Come on”, Tony mumbled. He hated waiting, but knew Gibbs would have his ass if he didn't settle down. Being nervous to the extent of being jittery was not a good thing when being under cover. He had to find a way to calm himself down and he had to do it quickly. 

Tony took a deep breath, or as deep as he could with the stinking hood over his head and mentally went through everything he knew about Preacher. His knowledge of the man might be the only thing that kept him alive to see through this operation. 

When the door next to him finally opened, Tony had managed to calm himself down and could portray his cocky persona again without going overboard or giving in to his nerves. “Why thank you, James,” Tony said with a heavy British accent as he got out of the vehicle. 

“Shut up, fuck nut.” Zach's voice sounded next to Tony as the man grabbed him by the arm and yanked him forward. 

Tony stumbled over his own feet at the sudden movement and clenched his fists in an attempt not to shove the other man. He had to remind himself that he had to play nice or he might end up in a ditch. He bit hard into his bottom lip as led Zach lead him into what looked like a large structure from what he could see through the grainy material. 

“You can remove the hood”, Reggie’s voice sounded off to the right and Tony grabbed hold of the thing and yanked it off. 

“What is this place?” Tony asked as he looked around. 

“That’s not important, what is important is why we’re here.” Zach answered with a sneer. 

“Okay, I’ll bite. Why are we here?” Tony asked and forced a grin on his face. 

Zach grinned back, his eyes shined with malice. You’re Italian so you know that when you start working in a restaurant you start in the kitchen and work your way up.” 

“You want me to do the dishes.” Tony looked around. “Don't see any.” 

Zach barked out a laugh. “Keep up that smart ass attitude of yours - you’re going to need it.” He walked over to where Tony saw some shovels for the first time. “Since you’re at the bottom you get to do the digging.” He indicated to the barren earth around them. “Wherever you want, but make sure you dig deep enough to fool the noses of any of those hounds you Feds use.” 

Tony didn’t like the sound of Zach words one bit, but instead of reacting to them, he replied on the last part of Zach’s statement. “I’m not a Fed anymore.” 

“Once a pig always a pig”, Zach sneered as he shoved the shovel into Tony's hands. “Now get digging.” He didn’t look back, but walked over to where Reggie was leaning against a wall of the dilapidated building. 

For one second Tony wanted to slam the shovel hard between Zach’s shoulder blades, but knew that would only get him killed. Instead, he weighed the shovel in his hands to get a feel for it and then bent forward and started to dig. He was aware of the two men talking behind him as he continued digging. Soon his arms and shoulders were screaming at the workout they were receiving. Tony breathed hard as he struck the shovel deep into the ground and rested on the handle. “May I have some water?” He took a deep breath and used the hem of his shirt to wipe away the sweat on his face. 

“Sure”, Reggie reached out, grabbed a bottle of water and threw it to Tony. 

“Thanks”, Tony took a deep swallow and then capped the water again. “Are you going to tell me what I’m digging here?” 

“What do you think you’re digging?” Zach rolled his eyes as he took a bottle of water for himself. 

“If I knew, I wouldn’t have asked.” Tony barked back. 

“Well, you don’t need to know, you just need to do what you’re told. You’ll see soon enough.” Reggie was the one who spoke up and Tony looked on as Zach nodded his head and settled down. 

Tony took a final swig of his water and then went back to digging. At one stage, he heard an engine start up and wondered if they left him there all alone, but when he looked up, he saw Reggie was still hanging around. He had no idea why Zach left or where he went to, but had a feeling that even if he asked he wouldn’t receive an answer. When the hole was deep enough for him not to see over the side anymore and knew he would need a hand to get out. “Is this deep enough?” He yelled. 

At first, he heard nothing, but then footsteps came closer and he looked up as Reggie looked over the edge. 

“Well?” He asked as he flung the shovel to the side. 

“It’s deep enough.” Reggie grinned. “Need a hand?” He asked even as he leaned in to help Tony out. 

“Thanks”, Tony leaned with his hands on his knees, he was beyond tired, but had a feeling that whatever they were doing here was far from over. When he got his breath back, he looked up and around as if he noticed Zach missing for the first time. “Where’s Zach?” 

“Don’t worry, he’ll be back soon.” Reggie slapped Tony on the shoulder and passed him another bottle of water. 

“Thanks”, Tony replied gratefully and finished the bottle in a few seconds flat. As it looked like Reggie was relaxed, Tony decided to try again. “I love digging a hole as much as the next guy, you know, but if I knew why I was digging it, it could inspire me more.” He grinned from ear to ear. 

Reggie looked him up and down and then shook his head. “You really should learn how to keep your trap shut and just do what you’re told.” He picked up the shovel Tony had placed on the ground and shoved it into Tony’s hands. “Dig, it’s still not deep enough.” He didn't look back as he walked away. 

Tony took the shovel and again thought of committing murder, but knew that wouldn't be a wise move. Instead, he offered a mock salute and jumped back in the hole. Soon he was sweating again, but he continued digging, wanting to get it finished as soon as possible. He only looked up when he heard Reggie’s voice above him. 

“That’s deep enough, time for the next part.” An evil grin appeared on Reggie’s face and Tony shivered hard. 

“Goody, I can’t wait.” Tony answered sarcastically and took the offered hand to get out of the hole once again. He walked behind Reggie and had to squint when they exited the building, which he’d decided was something like a warehouse, as it only had the four walls with no windows and only the one door. An unknown truck stood in front of them, Zach leaned against the side. 

“He done?” He addressed Reggie, ignoring Tony totally. 

“Yep”, Reggie replied as he walked over to Zach and stood next to him. “Let’s see just how loyal you really are.” Reggie stepped away from the back door and used the large handle to open it up. 

Tony stared at the cages that lined the floor of the truck. At first, he thought they were empty, but as his eyes got used to the darkened interior he noticed that each cage contained something. “What are those?” He took a step forward and then wished he hadn’t. At that moment, Tony knew he had to remain stoic and calm - this was a test, set up just for him and if he balked in any way he would be killed. For the first time he noted the shotgun that Zach had in his hand. 

Zach grinned. “You seem less curious than before, Tony? No longer so noisy now are you?” He barked out a laugh. “Welcome to the family. Your first order of business, and yes, before you ask, this comes directly from Preacher himself, is to clean out each and every cage from top to bottom before loading them back into the truck. Should you refuse to do so, I won’t hesitate one moment to shoot you to bits. In fact, I’m actually looking forward to it.” Zach went so far as to place his index finger on the trigger and grinned. 

Tony could feel the sweat dripping off his body - his hands were trembling hard. For a moment, he wished it was just a dream, but he knew that even if he pinched himself the outcome would not be different. He couldn't believe how strong his voice sounded when he finally spoke up. “And what would you be doing while I worked my ass off?” 

“Hang around, drink, wait for you to show your true colors, or at least barf your lungs out.” Zach lifted the shotgun and pointed it at Tony’s chest. "Go on, do it. I can't wait.” 

“I’m no longer a Fed.” Tony found the anger inside of him and stepped forward. “This is the true me.” He slammed his hand hard against his chest. 

Reggie sighed and spoke up. “I don’t give a rat’s ass, just do your job.” He grabbed Zach by the shoulder and dragged him back to the large warehouse. They left Tony behind with his next task. 

Tony stood in the one spot for a long while before he finally got his feet to move. He had to remain unconcerned and had to look as if he didn’t give a damn. He swallowed hard and took the last step so that he stood right at the back of the truck. He got his first good look at the contents of the truck. The cages were big enough for large breed dogs and it made the tiny bodies inside look even smaller. Tony would never get over the fact that he was grateful that not all of the cages were filled. In fact, it looked like most of them were indeed empty. 

He tried not to look at the body as he lifted the cage out of the back, but the faint pink dress and the dark curls made him look and he had to bite down hard on his bottom lip so that no sob escaped him. The girl was no older than four years of age and as he carried her to her temporary resting place, he memorized her face in every small detail possible. He would not forget her. He carried the cage to the edge of the hole and then placed it on the ground. The gate faced up and he had little trouble in opening it up. Gently he lifted her out and then holding her close to his body, he jumped into the hole and placed her in the corner. One of her curls had landed across her face and he tenderly wiped it away. He looked up as he heard a voice above him. 

“Smile”, Zach grinned as he pressed down on the button of a digital camera, taking a photo with Tony and the dead girl in the mass grave. He smiled again as he looked at the photo on the screen. “Perfect.” Without looking at Tony again, he walked away. 

Tony’s knees buckled and he landed hard on the ground. He wanted nothing more than to scream aloud, to bang his fists against the ground, to rip his hair out of his head, but he couldn’t because now more than ever he realized just how important it became to catch these bastards. He had no time to mourn her short life, or to mourn any of the other children he still had to bury. He would mourn them later; he would mourn for himself later. 

Three hours later he threw the shovel to the side and sank to his knees. He had buried four children in the grave he just filled up again. Four faces that he would never forget. They were etched in his mind and tonight when he had the time he would put them to paper, he would draw their faces each and every night to make sure he never forgot them. When he was finally free of the hell he found himself in, he would make sure to return them to their families and would ask for forgiveness. It didn’t matter to him that he didn’t do anything wrong, that they were dead even before he first saw them, he still felt as if it was his fault and he would do anything in his power to repent. 

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“Damn it, DiNozzo”, Gibbs cursed as he looked at his watch yet again. Tony had failed to contact them in over seventy-two hours and Gibbs’ gut had started to turn about seventy hours before. Something was up and he had no idea what it was. 

When Tony first took on this mammoth task, they knew he would only make contact with them whenever he could. Gibbs didn’t like the idea and now he had more reason not to like it. When Abby first suggested a tracker be implanted everyone had vetoed the idea, but now Gibbs wanted to slap himself for not agreeing. 

“Gibbs?” Abby spoke up as she approached his desk and Gibbs sighed. 

“Nothing yet, Abs.” 

Abby shook her head. “That’s not right, Gibbs. Something must be wrong. There’s just no way Tony would not make contact with us. He knows you would slap him silly if he didn’t contact us. You must find him, Gibbs. We must get him back. It’s too dangerous. He’s in danger. We need to get him back, Gibbs. You need to bring him back.” 

Gibbs remained silent. Abby’s words were true, but he had no idea where Tony was, so until his second in command made contact and told them either where he was or that he was fine, they could do nothing, except to worry. 

“McGee, phone the motel DiNozzo called us from, find out if they heard anything from him.” Gibbs glared. He knew it was a long shot, but it was their only lead. After the last time he spoke with Tony, he had McGee trace the call and they had discovered where Tony was staying. 

“On it, Boss.” McGee grabbed hold of his phone and quickly dialed the number. He had a feeling he knew what the answer would be, but he held hope. The conversation was short and when he hung up his shoulders slumped. 

“Boss, Tony only paid for two nights and according to the manager he left early on his departure day. They’ve not seen him since.” 

“We should go and check the room out, maybe Tony left us some sort of note.” Abby wrung her hands together out of nervousness. 

Gibbs shook his head, while McGee spoke up. “The room is already occupied by someone else, Abby.” 

“That doesn’t matter; I’ll still be able to find evidence.” Abby pouted. 

“Not going to work, Abby.” He stood up and grabbed her by her shoulders, holding her close. “We don’t know if anyone is watching the place, Abby. If we showed up, they would suspect something and we can’t risk Tony like that.” 

Abby bowed her head. She knew Gibbs was right, but still hated it. “So we just leave him out there, all alone?” 

“He’ll be all right”, Gibbs tried to pacify her, but his gut kept on telling him differently. 

This time Abby remained silent. She gave Gibbs a hug and then turned to go back to her lab. When she was out of earshot, Gibbs caught McGee’s gaze. “Go and keep an eye on her.” 

“On it, Boss.” Timothy jumped up and hurried after their forensic scientist. 

Gibbs waited for McGee to leave before he lowered his head onto his hands. “Where the hell are you, Tony?” He sighed and then got up. It wouldn’t help to sit and do nothing; he knew he had to keep himself busy. Gibbs found himself going down to the gym. He quickly wrapped his hands before pulling on a pair of boxing gloves. The bag in the corner would have to do the trick if he wanted to get rid of the excess energy he was carrying. Gibbs exercised until his legs grew weak and his muscles complained before he forced himself to do a quick cool down before hitting the showers. His gut was still turning, but at least he felt more focused. 

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“Are you sure about this?” Agent Fornell looked at the single sheet of paper that was pushed into his hands. 

“As sure as we can be.” The man answered as he took a pull on his cigarette. 

“Damn it”. Tobias cursed and crumpled the paper in his hands before straightening it out again. “I owe you.” 

The man grinned. “I know.” Without a further word spoken the man left, leaving a very uneasy FBI agent behind. 

“Well, this is going to be fun.” Tobias talked to himself as he neatly folded the wrinkled piece of paper and placed it on the inside of his jacket pocket. He looked at the time and sighed. If he wanted to appease the man he was going to piss off, he needed reinforcements. It was time to go and buy the cannoli. 

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Gibbs reached for his weapon as the first floor board above his head creaked. He relaxed when a familiar voice called out. “In here”, he responded and continued sanding. He didn’t look up as his visitor made his way down the stairs. 

“That’s not part of the boat.” 

Gibbs snorted. “Glad you can see that.” He cocked his head at the packet in the man’s hand. “Why are you bringing a peace offering, Tobias? What did you do wrong?” 

“Who says it’s for you, or that it’s even a peace offering? Maybe I was just hungry.” Tobias shrugged his shoulders even as he placed the bag with the container on the workbench. 

“If you were hungry, you would’ve dished up in the kitchen already before coming down here and the fact that I can smell the cannoli makes it a peace offering.” 

Tobias sighed. “You’re too damn good at this, Jethro.” He took out the food and offered one up to Gibbs. “I would rather have you eat one now, because I have a feeling that if you find out what I’m here for you’ll never eat them.” 

At first Gibbs wanted to decline, but then took the offering and quickly ate it up. “Spill.” He pulled two jars closer and poured decent shots of bourbon in each of them. 

“You know I’ve got a teenage daughter, right?” Tobias took a swallow of the golden liquor. 

“I’m well aware of that fact, Tobias. I am her godfather.” 

“Something which Diane always bitched about.” Tobias shook his head. “The saying of ‘don’t kill the messenger’ is applicable here.” He took a deep breath. “You’re not going to like it, Gibbs.” 

“I already do not like it, Tobias, so just tell me and get it over with.” Gibbs reached for his own drink and ignored his friend’s remark over killing the messenger. 

“Carmichael was released on parole a week and a half back.” 

Not all the alcohol in the world would’ve been enough for Gibbs when he heard what Fornell had to say. He had no words, just reached for the bottle again and filled their jars. He cleared his throat as it felt like he couldn’t breathe. “Why weren’t we informed about this? Why weren’t we informed about the parole hearing? And why the hell do you know this, as I who am working at NCIS do not?” 

“To answer your last question first, I was contacted by someone I know over at the Justice Department’s record section. According to him and the information we now have, one or other clerk noted the date for the hearing and apparently phoned NCIS headquarters. He inquired about the arresting agent and was informed that DiNutso no longer worked for NCIS. Instead of asking to speak to someone else, the clerk tried to find out where DiNutso was and then found the information we placed out there about Tony’s guilty finding and then in his wisdom decided to place that on the file. Someone else then decided that it means there’s no objection to Carmichael being released on parole.” 

“And let me guess, because Ben Matthews’ family immigrated they also decided not to contact them or any of the other families.” Gibbs was seething with anger. 

Tobias sighed and nodded his head. “Notes in the Carmichael file indicated that none of the families could be traced. We don’t know if there was any effort made to locate them, but that together with the note that there’s no objection by the agency made the parole board release him on parole for good behavior.” 

Gibbs remained silent draining his jar in quick succession before slamming it down on the workbench. “And let me guess, the only reason why we found out about this now is because Carmichael is in the wind?” 

“Yes, that and the fact that twin boys, age seven disappeared about five miles from where Carmichael was supposed to reside. The disappearance coincided with his first no show with his parole officer. He has failed to report ever since.” Tobias took the piece of paper out of his jacket and handed it to Gibbs. “Sean and Brian McCarthy. Both parents are in the Navy. I think you’ll find everything on their disappearance on your table by the latest tomorrow at 09:00.” 

The glass jar shattered against the brick wall and Gibbs roared in anger. The disappearance of the two boys was no coincidence. He knew that Carmichael took them; his gut told him that Ranger Preacher was involved as well and it meant that Tony was in danger. Carmichael might be a psychopath and a murderer, but he was not stupid. The moment he learned about a new member and found out it was Tony, he would know it was a trap and he would not hesitate to kill the man. “We need to find a connection between Ranger and Carmichael and we need to do it now.” Gibbs took the stairs two by two not even looking back to see if Fornell was following him. He had to get back to the office. They had to find Tony and bring him back. He didn’t even want to think about what it would mean not to find Tony in time. He couldn’t think about it. 


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 4**

**Winfield City: 5 days later**

Tony stood with his hands against the shower wall, the almost scalding water cascaded down his back. He was cold to the bone and dead on his feet. For the past hundred and twenty hours, he only had about ten hours of sleep. Not because he didn’t want to sleep, but because he couldn’t. Every time he closed his eyes and drifted off, he would see those four innocent looking faces staring at him. Their faces were mixed up in his own private nightmares. It’d been years since he last dreamed about those days. He shivered hard. Tony knew he wasn’t dealing with it very well and the fact that he sketched them each day made it worse, but he had to do it. He couldn’t forget them; he wouldn’t forget them. 

Their other activities also kept him awake. He now finally understood why this pedophile ring was so successful. They were meticulous. He was sent with Zach to scout out a park for two days, taking photos of every mother, father, nanny, older sibling and child that visited it. Each night Reggie would go through their photos of the day before he finally selected a number of young boys and girls. None of them was any older than seven years. He printed their photos out, placed them in a large envelope that he sealed before leaving with it in hand. He came back late on the third day and told them to pack up and leave. When Tony tried to inquire what was happening, Reggie made it clear that it had nothing to do with him. He got roughly the same answer when he inquired why they were targeting such young children when teenagers were easier to lure away and pick up. 

The middle of the night of the third day had seen them arriving in yet another small town, but this time they took up lodgings in an old rickety house, which didn’t look much from the outside, but at least had plenty of hot water. That night he tried to go out to see if he could make contact with Gibbs, but Reggie had other plans and Zach made sure he stayed between Tony and the door the whole evening until they finally went to bed early the following morning. 

Tony couldn’t help but to whimper as the images of that first night in the old house assaulted his mind. He had to help edit videos for mass distribution and just thinking about it now pushed the bile from the pit of his stomach right up to his throat. Seeing those young children being repeatedly raped made him want to attack both men with him with his bare hands, especially when he recognized the Hooper boy he had seen in the pictures Preacher showed him. He was still unsure how he managed to get through that night of torture without giving in to the urge to kill. What nearly pushed him over the edge was one of the last scenes; it showed the little girl he had to bury first, her screams echoed in his mind just as her face did. 

Tony dragged his thoughts back from the bleakness in his mind. He had carefully made notes, keeping them on him all the time, not wanting to take a chance that one of the men he was with searched the only bag he had. The morning of the fourth day, they sent him alone to a park where he had to take photos of every child that played there. He had no idea where Reggie or Zach went that day. He did as he was told, hating every moment of it, but he couldn’t take the chance that he was being watched. For that same reason he didn’t attempt to make contact with Gibbs, although he did spot an old payphone across from the park and wondered if he should take the chance to make a quick call. In the end he didn’t, but knew he had to tag in earlier than later; he had no idea what Gibbs might do if he stayed off the radar for too long. 

He returned to the house just as the sun disappeared behind the horizon. Reggie showed up around the same time. He was alone, but he had a smile on his face and by his smell, a few drinks in him as well. Tony soon realized that Reggie was a happy drunk, his tongue much looser than normal. He still couldn’t ask any direct questions, but Reggie did tell him that their boss was impressed with their selection and had given the go ahead on their plans. Unfortunately, Reggie refused to divulge any information on their plan, but he did say that Zach was out there getting what they needed. That information made Tony shiver with fear. He had no idea which children they selected or how to contact the police to warn them of what might happen. He was helpless. 

Zach arrived back at the house on the evening of the fourth day. He sported a large bandage on his right arm and when Reggie asked what happened, he’d indicated that one of the rats bit him. Reggie had laughed at him, making a joke that he should’ve known their teeth were sharp, but Zach only mumbled and Tony decided it best to keep quiet, although he was impressed that at least one of the children had managed to inflict some harm onto the large man. 

Just before they turned in for the night, Reggie brought Tony a beer with a feral grin on his face. The hair on Tony’s neck stood at an end as Reggie started to talk. “The Boss really likes you,” he took a sip of his own beer and then continued. “We’ve been keeping an eye on you for the past few days and you did what you were supposed to do. Zach still doesn’t trust you, but I agree with Preacher, so we’re going to give you a chance.” 

Tony managed to keep his face blank as his suspicions were confirmed. His heart rate shot up as Reggie spoke up again. 

“It’s time for some new material and Preacher decided to give you a chance to play. Apparently he was impressed with what he heard about you from our mutual friend Daniel Liston.” 

“Don’t yank my chain, Reggie. There’s no way that Preacher would let me near anyone so quickly.” Tony had to get Reggie to tell him what exactly they expected from him. 

Reggie shook his head. “You know, you and Zach are more alike than what you might think. He had about the same reaction when I told him, but no, I’m not _yanking your chain_ as you put it. Everything has been arranged you’ll meet your sweet surprise tomorrow night.” He reached inside his jacket and pulled out a folded photo. “I think you’ll remember him.” 

Tony took the photo and opened it slowly. He swallowed hard as he saw the face of a young boy with huge brown eyes and long eyelashes staring right into the lens. He had a huge smile on his little face. Tony remembered the child. He had smiled when he noticed his dad walking towards him. It was clear that his father meant the world to him. Tony was aware of the fact that his hands were shaking and he licked at his lips nervously. “He’s beautiful.” He managed to run a finger over the boy’s face, tracing the boy’s lips. 

“And he’s all yours, for as long as you can keep it entertaining.” Reggie got to his feet and slapped Tony on the shoulder. “By the shaking of your hands, I take it you’re getting excited.” He looked at Tony’s crotch. “But maybe you’ve got a little problem there as well. Hopefully it won’t be a problem tomorrow.” 

Tony heard Reggie’s words and he reached between his legs with his hand, clutching himself hard. “Just overwhelmed.” He grinned. “I can promise you there’s no problem.” He looked at the photo again. “I’m off to bed; it’s going to be a sweet night.” Tony grinned again as he pushed to his feet and started walking towards his room. He turned when he felt Reggie still staring at him. “Thanks for this, man. I can’t wait.” 

Reggie grinned and raised the bottle in his hand in salute to Tony before heading to his own room. Tony looked on until Reggie disappeared behind the closed door before he quickly made it to his own bedroom before he collapsed on the mattress. He wanted to vomit, but knew he couldn’t let on that there was anything wrong. Tony took some deep breaths as he tried to steady himself mentally. He had to get word to Gibbs; they had to stop this now. 

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Gibbs gasped as he woke up, his heart beating wildly in his chest as the last of the nightmare faded away. “Tony”, he rubbed his face hard with his hands, swung his legs off the couch and stood up. He didn’t even have to look at the time to know it was still too early to get up, but he also knew that he wouldn’t be able to get back to sleep again. He relaxed a little after a shower and with a large mug of coffee at his side, he worked on the boat before heading into the office just before six in the morning. 

Gibbs frowned as he entered the bullpen and found McGee and Bishop at their desks. “Internal memo I missed?” 

McGee shook his head. “No, Boss. We decided to come in early to see if we could find any information on Carmichael’s whereabouts.” 

“And?” 

Bishop shook her head. “Nothing as yet, Gibbs, but we’ll keep on trying.”

“Do that.” Gibbs placed his badge and gun in his drawer. “Going to see Abby.” He didn’t look back at his team as he took the stairs down to Abby’s lab. He didn’t need to guess that she’d be there; when one of her family was absent and not accounted for, Abby spent most of her hours in her lab. 

The blaring music greeted him first before he saw her standing behind her computer typing away. He placed a Caf-Pow down next to her and kissed her gently on the cheek. “Did you at least go home last night, Abby?” 

Abby sighed tiredly and shook her head. “I kept on dreaming about Tony, Gibbs. He was running from something, but the more he tried to outrun it, the more it gained on him. I kept on feeling this impact on my body before I woke up screaming, I just couldn’t take it anymore, so I came in.” 

A chill went through Gibbs’ body as he listened to Abby’s words. It was as if she was narrating his dreams to him. It made his gut turn even worse. “What are you working on, Abs?” 

“You remember how we found Carmichael the first time?” 

“Through one or other social thingy.” Gibbs frowned as he tried to remember what it was. 

“Yes, through a chat group.” Abby nodded her head as she let her fingers glide over the keyboard again. “You remember how Tony established contact with the creep by posing as one of the creepy ones himself?” 

Gibbs nodded his head. He also remembered how nauseated Tony was after he had to keep on having conversations with the creepy bastard on his _favorite_ games he liked to play with his _special friends_. “You doing something like that?” 

“Yes and no.” Abby indicated to the screen. “I will never be able to hold a conversation with creeps like that without giving myself away, but I’ve managed to set up perimeters on some shady chat rooms that will signal me when certain phrases are used. In that way we can monitor them and hopefully get a hit on Carmichael. We know how big his ego is, there’s no way he won’t try to brag about himself on these kinds of sites. If we can trace him we might find out his location and get eyes on him.” 

Gibbs was impressed. “Good job, Abby.” He kissed her again. “Let McGee help you out if you need him to.” 

“I’ll do that, Bossman.” Abby bounced again as the Caf-Pow gave her some needed energy. 

Gibbs sighed as he exited Abby’s lab. He needed to make one more stop, and although he wanted and even _needed_ to speak to his closest friend, he was still hesitant to go down there. He knew Ducky would take one look at him and would know exactly what was wrong. Gibbs himself knew, but he wasn’t sure if he was in a state to acknowledge his own feelings. 

Before he could stop himself, he stepped through the sliding doors and felt a sense of calm settle over him. The autopsy room was always peaceful to him, even though most people found it to be creepy. 

"There you are, Jethro.” Ducky's voice preceded him as he stepped out of his office just as Gibbs entered the room. Ducky took one look at his friend and shook his head. "You look awful, Jethro.” He cocked his head. “You finally acknowledged your own feelings.” A sad looked appeared on his face. “I know you will not run, Jethro, but you want to. You want to bury those feelings deep and you want to forget that you ever let them come to the surface. However, you cannot. You have been running for far too long, it is now the time to stop running; it is time to start living again.” 

“And that’s the reason why I didn’t want to come down here.” Gibbs sighed as he entered Ducky’s small office and headed straight to the cabinet where he knew Ducky kept something stronger than tea. 

“And yet, you did come.” Ducky smiled. He didn’t comment on the fact that Gibbs agreed with him without even trying to deny it. 

“What if I’m too late?” Gibbs nearly whispered the words. 

Ducky frowned at the question. “Are you then saying that Anthony will not be returned to us?” 

Gibbs’ head snapped up at the question. “Of course he will come back to us.” 

“Then I am sorry to say, I do not understand your question, Jethro. That boy, although after all the years that have passed - I should call him a young man, as he is no longer just a boy - has worshipped you since the day you met. You know about his past just as I do, and that he never knew love. You mean everything in the world to him; he loves you more than he loves himself. Surely you have seen that.” Ducky shook his head as he saw that Gibbs wanted to interrupt. “And you know as well as I do that all those stories about his so called hot dates, were just that – stories. As for Jeanne, well, she was there for him when you were not here, but it would not have worked out between them and I am not talking about the fact that she came to know him as someone else. They were not meant to be together. There was nothing between him and Ziva, except for the loss of a sibling. You have been harboring your feelings for him for years, it is really now time you manned up and told him how you feel about him.” 

“Are you saying he feels the same about me, Duck?” Gibbs inquired carefully. 

The head slap on the back of his head was unexpected, but it still made Gibbs smile and his shoulders relaxed. “Guess I deserved that.” 

Ducky merely huffed. “You are still worried about him, and rightly so. You know as well as I do how personally Anthony takes these types of cases, but he will be all right for now. You just need to be there for him when he gets back. I know both of you have abundant vacation time due to you; I would suggest that you clear it with Director Vance as early as possible. Take Anthony away, let him become human again before he gets back to work.” 

“I was planning on doing that, Duck.” 

“Then all is settled.” Ducky reached for a file and opened it up. “I had a look at Jonathan Carmichael’s file. I can tell you many things that you already know about him, but I would urge you to track him down and arrest him as soon as possible, Jethro. You are aware of the fact that he is one sadistic bastard, one that taunted Anthony all throughout his trial, and if he finds out about our young friend, I can promise you he will see it as a ruse. If Carmichael finds out about Anthony he would not hesitate in letting Preacher know and even though Preacher might still be behind bars, his reach is still very long and he will not hesitate to take Anthony out.” Ducky took a deep breath. “From Preacher’s file we also know he likes making examples of people and Anthony would be used as an excellent example of how not to double cross him.” 

Gibbs’ gut churned at Ducky’s words. It was what he had suspected, but it didn’t mean he wanted to hear it. “It will not happen, Duck. Never.” He turned on his heels, exited autopsy and made his way back up to the bullpen. His gut clenched as he caught McGee’s eye. “Spit it out, McGee.” 

Timothy gulped. “Unconfirmed sighting of Carmichael came through, Boss.” 

“And?” Although he asked the question, he didn’t want to hear the answer, because his gut was already screaming it at him. 

“He was sighted in Gardner, Kansas, Gibbs.” 

“Get the locals on the line.” Gibbs reached out and threw the sedan’s keys towards Bishop. “Gas the car.” 

Both agents merely nodded their heads as McGee got the police on the line and Bishop scurried out to make sure their car was filled up. 

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Tony shuddered as the door clicked closed behind him and he let out a sigh of relief. Not looking back, he started jogging down the road. He had to get hold of Gibbs; he couldn’t let this go any further. He would’ve liked to be able to take Gibbs and the team directly to where the children were, but he couldn’t risk not getting a chance to call in the cavalry. He had spotted another pay phone a few blocks away from the dilapidated house they were staying in and could only hope that it was in a working order. He still couldn’t believe that Reggie and Zach were letting him out of their sight. At least it looked like they accepted his story of needing to go for a run before he exploded with anticipation. He shuddered again as he thought back on the conversation he had with the two men prior to his escape. 

_“What time are we leaving?” Tony asked as he bounced nervously on his toes._

_“When it’s time,” Zach rumbled back where he sat on the couch watching some outdated sitcom._

_Tony had to control his own temper as he sighed and lowered his eyes. “Sorry man, I don’t want to sound like a child, but I’m really looking forward to this, I’m so stoked, I just want to get there.” He tried to sound ecstatic and moved nervously across the floor._

_Zach huffed, but Reggie spoke up. “You really are hyper, go and wank off, it will make you relax.”_

_“I can’t.” Tony grinned from ear to ear. “Trust me; if I touch myself again, I’m sure it will fall off. I’ve been jacking off since you told me last night man and I want to be able to perform tonight, you know.”_

_Zach looked up and snorted. “Just tell us again how did an up standing FBI guy like yourself become involved in the sleazy underworld of child porn?”_

_Tony knew that Zach still didn’t trust him and he tried to stay out of the other man’s way for as much as possible, but he knew that this was one conversation he wouldn’t be able to ignore. “First of all, I was never an FBI agent. I worked for NCIS – Naval Criminal Investigative Service. Please don’t confuse the two. As for how I got involved? What do you want to hear? How I first realized that I liked looking at small boys and that I got raging hard just thinking about them, when I was just a teenager. Or should I tell you the heart wrenching story of how my own father molested me at the age of eight and by the age of ten I was a real slut, putting it out for my father whenever he had a stressful day at the office, which was every day.” Tony kept repeating Rule #7 to himself – always be specific when you lie._

_“Or would you like me to tell you how I thought that there is something horribly wrong with me and that I spend years in therapy bullshitting myself before I finally realized that there is nothing wrong with me, that’s who I am and I finally made peace with it until I got careless and I was busted. But am I remorseful for what I’ve done – no. Then why did I opt for a deal – easy, because I’m not stupid. By taking a deal I got less time and it means I can get back to what I love doing; this time just being more careful.”_

_Zach held up his hands in mock surrender. “You are a fucking pervert.”_

_“And you love me for it.” Tony grinned as he reached for his crotch and cupped himself. He waited for Zach to look away before he spoke up again. “I need to get out of the house, it’s nearly dark. I’m going for a run, I’ll be back in about an hour, unless you tell me I need to be back earlier.” He held his breath as the other two men looked at one another before Reggie finally nodded his head. He didn’t wait for either of them to say a word, but just made his way over to the front door and left._

Tony kept to an easy pace as he jogged away from the house. He wanted to run flat out, but knew that would cause suspicion. Once or twice he jerked when a dog would suddenly bark, but steadily he settled into a nice rhythm as the house disappeared behind him and the phone booth appeared in the distance. His heart rate was elevated, but his breathing still under control as he reached out and grabbed hold of the receiver to phone the one number he would never forget. 

Tony frowned as the phone screeched in his ear as he placed the receiver against his ear. He quickly dialed the number and waited for the phone to ring on the other side. “Come on, Boss, pick up.” He mumbled as he waited for Gibbs to answer his phone. Tony became aware of a vehicle approaching at high speed and something told him to turn around. “Shit!” By the shape of the vehicle, he knew it was Reggie and Zach and that they were looking for him. Something must’ve spooked them and he knew if they saw him by the phone, they wouldn’t hesitate to kill him. “Come on, Boss, pick up!” This time he shouted the words out of frustration as Gibbs’ phone kept on ringing. The vehicle came closer and Tony realized he had no place to hide. He tried to make himself small against the phone booth, hoping that the men in the vehicle wouldn’t take note of someone at the phone booth. The bullet impact inches above his head as the shot echoed through the quiet neighborhood made him realize that his time was up. It was also at the same time that he finally heard Gibbs’ voice through the receiver. 

“Boss!” Tony yelled. He could barely hear Gibbs on the other side and could only hope that the man could hear him as he started to explain where he was and what was going on. The second shot was even closer than the first and Tony dropped the receiver as he started to run. The third shot was right next to his foot as he tried to make a beeline for a group of trees that he could see in the distance. He hoped it would give him enough cover and that it trees would make it difficult for them to follow him. Tony didn't even think about the fact that his cover was blown. Right at that moment it didn't matter, it only mattered that the children were found and that they would be all right. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%202_zpsbakn532b.jpg.html)

“Gibbs,” he answered and frowned at the noise coming from the phone. “Gibbs,” he repeated again and he blanched as he heard Tony’s voice faintly over the phone. Before he could inquire, Tony started talking very fast. Gibbs gasped as he heard the distinctive sound of gunfire. By the time the second shot rang out, Gibbs was already on his way down to Abby to get her to trace the call. He couldn’t clearly hear when Tony informed him where he was. 

“Tony!” He yelled, as the noises over the phone increased. He could hear the third shot and tires that squealed. It was clear that Tony was no longer on the phone and the dread settled in the pit of his stomach. “Please be all right.” He whispered softly as he stepped into Abby’s lab and found her, together with McGee working. 

“Trace the call,” he barked out the order as he pressed the phone into McGee’s hand and paced the room. 

For a moment, both the Goth and the geek stared at him before they sprang into action. One look at the screen told them that the call was still active and their hands scrambled over the keyboards in an attempt to get a trace and lock on the call’s origination. 

“Was it Tony, Gibbs?” Abby asked as she continued typing away. She looked over her shoulder when she received no reply. “Gibbs!” She called out again. 

Gibbs looked up and met her gaze. “Find him, Abby.” He turned to McGee. “Get the locals to that location ASAP. “Where’s Bishop?” He asked as he looked around. The youngest agent wasn’t in the bullpen and she wasn’t in the lab as well. 

“Here,” Bishop spoke up behind him. She sounded a bit out of breath. “I was just coming up the stairs when I heard you on the phone. I went to gas up the car.” She held out the key to him. 

Gibbs nodded in her direction as he grabbed Abby’s office phone. He had to tell the director what was going on. The conversation was brief and with a promise to keep Vance up to date, Gibbs turned his attention back to his team. “And?” 

“The call originated from a pay phone in Winfield, Kansas. The locals are on their way.” McGee spoke up. “They will get in touch with us the moment they’re there.” 

“Gibbs, what did Tony say?” Abby’s voice sounded small. 

Gibbs looked at her and then at McGee and Bishop before he answered. “Nothing much, just where he was, which I couldn’t catch due to the static on the line and that his cover was blown.” 

“There’s something you’re not telling us, Gibbs.” Abby took a few steps in his direction. 

Gibbs sighed. “I could hear shots being fired in the background.” 

Abby gasped and grabbed Tim’s hand, squeezing it hard. “Is he okay? Is Tony all right?” 

“I don’t know, Abs. That’s what we need to find out.” Gibbs took his cell back from McGee, who’d ended the call after they’d managed to trace it. “How long before the locals get there?” 

“They said ETA was five minutes, Boss.” 

“Get them on the line, find out what’s going on.” Gibbs couldn’t wait five minutes, none of them could. 

“On it, Boss.” McGee grabbed his own phone and started making calls. He blocked the people around him out as he waited for his call to be connected. Within minutes he was speaking to the desk sergeant of the small precinct. He tried not to sigh as he had to explain who he was and the reason for his call. Tim nearly groaned in frustration as he heard the phone being placed on a desk or a counter and he was left waiting. He turned away not to catch Gibbs’ eye, nothing good would come if Gibbs found out what they were doing. 

Tim sighed as the phone was picked up again, but then had to calm himself down as he realized he was speaking to someone else. With patience he did not have, he explained again and held his breath as the person who identified himself as Sergeant Williams relayed the report they had received. Tim could feel the blood draining from his face as the sergeant mentioned the bullet impact holes they found on the pay phone as well as some blood leading away from the scene. What nearly made him drop the phone was when Williams explained why it took them longer to get back to him. Tim scribbled the details down and even before he disconnected the phone, he was already on the internet looking for the first available flights out. It would take them about three hours by plane to get to Kansas and then another three hours to Winfield. If they travelled by car it would take them about fifteen hours, shorter if Gibbs drove, but still too long. 

“Boss,” McGee swallowed hard. “You’re not going to like this.” Deciding to tell it straight, Timothy repeated what he learned. “On the way to the first scene, a 911 call came through which the responding officer felt was related to our call. Someone called stating shots had been fired and that they witnessed a large dark SUV type vehicle running someone down, before the vehicle stopped. The vehicle hit the person who was then picked up and the SUV sped off. The distance was too far to get a license plate number.” McGee was aware that Abby had gone very quiet, but he didn’t dare look in her direction, not if he wanted to keep it together. 

Gibbs bowed his head. He had noticed the way Tim had tensed up, but he never expected something like this. “How far away is the pay phone from where this second incident occurred?” 

“Less than a mile, Boss.” McGee looked at the computer screen when it beeped. “Seats booked on the next available flight to Kansas, Boss. It departs in just over an hour and a half.” 

“Let’s get going.” Gibbs turned and pulled Abby into his arms. “We’ll get him back, Abs.” He couldn’t get himself to say that Tony would be all right. This time around, he just didn’t know if it would be true. He could only get there as soon as possible and find his missing agent. 

Abby was aware of the tears running down her face. She wanted to call out to Gibbs to take her as well, but she knew she’d be of more assistance in her lab. She would be the one to analyze all of the evidence that the team would collect. She also had to keep an eye on the search for Carmichael; something told her that he would be the link in finding Tony again. Abby tried to push the images that she saw in her dreams away as they kept on flashing in front of her. She shivered hard as she once again felt the impact of something hitting Tony. Unfortunately, now she knew what it was. Abby shook her head. “He’s not dead, Tony is not dead.” She swiped at the tears and turned to call up the photos on her screens. A smiling Tony appeared and she smiled back. “We’ll find you, Tony, just hold on. Gibbs is on his way.” 

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**Three hours earlier**

Zach roared with fury as he ended the call and pushed the cell phone into his back pocket. It had taken him a long time to convince Preacher that they needed it. He could understand the man’s paranoia with it, as it was easy to trace, but it also made it so much easier to communicate. The compromise – a different burn phone every two days and if they had to communicate with one another more than three times a day, the phone was tossed and a new one was purchased. 

When Preacher instructed him to make sure DiNozzo knew about the phone, Zach stood up to his leader and with some harsh words he managed to convince Preacher to hold on; to make sure they could trust the Fed as he wanted them to believe. Now - now he was grateful that he convinced Preacher, and he was even more grateful for the information he’d just received. 

“Reggie!” Zach called out as he leaped to his feet and grabbed hold of the Desert Eagle lying next to him, shoving it down his jeans and reached for the SUV’s keys at the same time. “Reggie!” He called out again and stormed to the back of the house. “Where the fuck are you, man? We need to go.” He found his partner in the back room they used as an office busy looking at some porn. “Stop giving attention to your dick for a second, we’ve got problems.” 

Reggie paused the DVD and looked over his shoulder. “What now?” 

“I’ll tell you on the way, let’s go.” He picked up the 9mm Taurus and shoved it in Reggie’s hands. “Let’s go.” He jogged out of the house and jumped into the large vehicle. As he started to engine, he explained. “One of Preacher’s contacts, and one sick son of a bitch by the name of Johnathan Carmichael got released on parole a week or two back.” 

“Johnathan Carmichael? Why does his name sound so familiar?” Reggie asked as Zach sped off. 

“Because he’s a _household name_ when it comes to child porn. He was also convicted of murder about thirteen years back.” Zach grinned. “Long story short, as I said he got released on bail and he managed to make contact with Preacher when he found out about DiNozzo. DiNozzo was the one who caught him and put him away. DiNozzo would never be involved with child porn. Preacher has been played; we all have been played.” 

“How does Preacher and Carmichael know one another?” Reggie frowned. He’d never heard Preacher mention the other man’s name before. But, then on the other hand, it wasn’t as if he talked to Preacher every day. 

Zach looked over at Reggie. “They shared a boy or two years ago.” He looked at the road in front of him. “We’ve got instructions to hunt DiNozzo down.” 

“Fuck,” Reggie cursed. “He didn’t go for a run.” 

“Nope, he went to call for backup and then he would’ve returned and when we took him to the little bastards, we would’ve been caught.” Zach growled again. 

“I’m going to kill him.” Reggie snarled. He wouldn’t admit it, but he’d started to like the man. He even thought that they might become friends. 

Zach laughed. “No, we’re not going to kill him. We’re going to play with him. Preacher said that Carmichael would contact us and meet up with us. The honor of killing DiNozzo would rest on him, but we can play as long as we want to.” 

Reggie nodded his head and then his eye caught something on the side of the road. “There, at the pay phone.” He pointed out, leaned out of the passenger window and pulled the trigger once. He aimed wide, it wouldn’t help to kill their prey but he would love seeing DiNozzo running scared. Both men laughed as DiNozzo took evasive action and then the chase was on. 

Reggie fired two more shots and frowned when he saw where Tony was headed. "We need to cut him off, if he gets into the trees we won't be able to follow." 

Zach grunted in agreement and pressed down on the gas, the SUV lurched forward. He laughed as Tony looked back and stumbled over something on the ground. Zach could see the distance closing between them and he smiled again. “Can’t wait to get my hands on him.” He pressed down on the gas again, silently urging the SUV to go even faster. 

“Don’t kill him,” Reggie warned as he saw that Zach aimed straight for the running man. 

“He wouldn’t be so lucky.” Zach slowed down as they neared Tony and then kept right on his tail, revving the engine a few times. He laughed as Tony tried to zigzag away from them, but since the ground was level it was easy to maneuver the vehicle behind him. 

Reggie leaned out of the passenger window and aimed at DiNozzo. “I’m aiming for his legs, swerve away; I don’t want you to drive over him when he falls.” 

Once again Zach only grunted out in response, but Reggie could feel the vehicle slowing down even more, the gap between man and car increasing. The shot echoed through the night and Reggie had to hold onto the sissy bar when Zach veered quickly to the side. “Fuck,” he yelled as their prey stumbled in his run. Instead of falling away from the vehicle, he fell the other way. Reggie cringed as Zach clipped Tony, the sound of flesh and bone hitting the metal of the SUV hard. 

Zach winced as he felt the impact through the steering wheel. He immediately stopped the vehicle and even before Reggie could get out, he was out of the driver’s seat himself. He held his weapon in front of him, DiNozzo might be down but he still didn’t trust him. 

Reggie kneeled next to the fallen man and shuddered at the blood that was pooling beneath him. 

“He dead?” Zach asked. 

“No, he’s still alive, but unconscious.” Reggie wiped the blood away on his hand, which he used to check for a pulse. “What now?” 

“Now? Now we load him up. I know just the place to take him.” Zach replied, not a smidgen of emotion audible in his voice. 

“He’s gonna need medical attention.” Reggie looked at the way Tony’s right leg angled away from his body. The left leg was bleeding profusely from where Reggie’s shot struck him high in the upper leg. He had a bleeding head wound as well. 

“He’ll survive.” Zach wasn’t concerned. “Let’s get him in the back. I don’t want to be caught out here.” He looked around before grabbing Tony’s arm and heaved him up. Between the two men, they managed to dump Tony into the back of the SUV. 

“What about our stuff?” Reggie asked. 

“I’ll come and collect it after I’ve dropped you off. It will also give me a chance to see what’s going on here when I return.” Zach sped off. 

“You need to get rid of the vehicle as well.” Reggie spoke up. There was a large dent on the side of the SUV where Tony’s body slammed into it. The left front headlight was also smashed and he was sure he’d seen blood on the bumper even though it was dark. 

“I’ll do that.” Zach reached into his pocket and took out the phone. “Destroy the SIM card, and take the phone apart.” He waited for Reggie to comply with his orders before he took the small card and flicked it out of the window. “Keep the battery here, we’ll burn it later.” He kept the shell of the phone and only flung it out of the window after driving for another ten minutes. “I’ll pick up a new one later and let Preacher know what happened.” 

Reggie looked back at the unconscious form of the man lying on the back seat. “We can make money.” 

Zach frowned. “What do you mean?” 

A sly grin appeared on Reggie’s face. “I’ll tell you later, just make sure you bring all of the equipment with you.” 

“Will it involve beating the shit out of him?” Zach used the rearview mirror to look at Tony. 

“And so much more.” Reggie rubbed his hands together. “We need to move the little brats as well.” 

“Already done. Preacher said he’d take care of it.” Zach slowed down and turned off onto a dirt road nearly invisible to the naked eye. 

“What’s this place?” 

“Somewhere safe.” Zach replied as he crept along the narrow trail. After driving for another fifteen minutes an old house came into view as the SUV’s lights shone on it. “I’ve not been here in more than ten years.” 

“I didn’t know you’re from this area.” Reggie frowned at the piece of information. 

“I’m not.” Zach left it at that. “Let’s get him inside. There’s a basement.” 

Between the two men, they managed to haul Tony out of the large vehicle and drag him into the house. It was totally dark as they dumped Tony in the middle of the floor. “There should be some candles around.” Zach took out a penlight and flashed it around until he finally remembered where they would be. Leaving Reggie behind with Tony, he made his way into the passage and opened the large cupboard that stood against the wall. “Bingo”, he grabbed hold of the candles and the packet of matches and brought them back. “I’ll get more supplies later.” He lit the candles, making shadows play against the walls. 

“It’s very sturdy.” Reggie spoke up as he looked around the large room. 

“It is.” Once again, Zach didn’t supply any extra information. “Stay here, I’m going to check out the rest of the place.” He didn’t wait for Reggie to respond, just grabbed one of the candles and walked out of the room. 

Reggie turned to face a still unconscious Tony. “Can’t believe I started to trust you.” He kicked Tony hard on the side of his body. “You’ll pay for it.” He sneered as he bent down and started to assess Tony’s wounds. The head wound was still bleeding, although sluggish while the bullet wound to Tony’s thigh were still pulsing with blood. Reggie peeled his shirt off and tied it around Tony’s leg. “Can’t have you bleed to death; not now in any case.” He reached for his knife and proceeded to cut the right leg of Tony’s jeans. He couldn’t help but to hiss at the sight. Tony’s lower leg was badly shattered, the bone protruding from the skin. “I hope your agent days are over.” He snickered. “But then, you won’t live to be an agent again, so it doesn’t really matter.” He looked around with the aid of the candle Zach left behind and walked a bit deeper into the house. There were three large bedrooms, one decent size bathroom, a living room where they dumped Tony and an extra-large kitchen. To the side there was a door and Reggie guessed it led to the basement as he could hear sounds coming from below. He found two pieces of wood and took them back to where Tony was. He proceeded to cut Tony’s shirt from his body and used the rags and the pieces of wood to construct a crude splint for Tony’s leg. He grinned at the sight. “Don’t worry, I won’t let our viewers see that, unless of course they want to.” He pressed down onto the bone and couldn’t help but to shudder as Tony groaned in pain yet never regained consciousness. 

Reggie looked on as Zach spoke behind him. “It’s ready, let’s get him down there.” Zach didn’t react to the splint or the tourniquet on Tony’s leg. Instead, he grabbed hold of Tony’s arm again and started dragging him towards the kitchen. Reggie picked up Tony’s other arm and together they moved him from the living room. “Head first.” Zach said and turned so that Tony’s head faced the door. “The stairs are a bit narrow, so grab his feet.” He waited while Reggie complied before they headed down the stairs. “Found some lamps and kerosene. It’s fairly bright down there now.” 

The sight that greeted Reggie was not the one he expected. A sturdy workbench stood in the middle of the floor. To the side, he could see some chains hanging from the beams and in the corner there was a large rusty looking cage. His eyes were drawn to a large X-cross type of thing in the other corner. It looked like it had manacles attached to the four points and then he realized what it was. “You’ve been holding out on me, Zach.” 

Zach shrugged his shoulders. “Not mine.” He dragged Tony by his arms until he maneuvered him into the cage and closed the door. “I’ll bring a padlock for it, but I don’t think we’ll need it now. He won’t be getting away from us like this.” 

“So it’s going to be more than just torture, I take it.” Reggie’s cock twitched hard. 

A feral smile appeared on Zach’s face. “I still don’t know what you’ve got planned, but you see that cross there, well, I’m planning on fucking him until that thing breaks.” He cupped his dick. “I have a feeling he’ll even be tighter than those little bastards we play with and unlike with them, I can’t wait to hear him scream and plead.” 

“Fuck”, Reggie palmed himself. “Get going, I can’t wait.” He headed towards the stairs and Zach followed behind him. 

“I’ll get us all that we need. Just make sure he doesn’t get away.” Zach spoke up as they stood facing one another in the kitchen again. 

“Don’t worry, he won’t.” Both men grinned and then Zach left, nearly running out of the house to get things done. 

Reggie looked back at the closed basement door behind him and then yawned. “Time to take a nap.” He sat down on the wooden floor and leaned with his back against the wall. He would not let Tony get away. With his hand on his crotch, he drifted off to sleep. 

Down in the basement, Tony groaned, his head turned to the side and he coughed once. A speck of blood appeared on his lips before he fell silent again. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20cover%201_zpspwdrwvbn.jpg.html)


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 5**

Gibbs stared at the scene before him. He was aware that McGee and Bishop were both at his side, collecting evidence. They’d tagged and sketched everything and he personally took all of the necessary photos. What he saw made him shiver, but not with cold. He’d walked the path back to where the pay phone was, riddled with holes. He’d found traces of tracks from someone obviously running from the scene followed closely by the tire imprints of a large vehicle. The size of the shoe, fit Tony, but he had no idea if it was Tony’s print or not. The same went for the blood and unfortunately there was plenty of that. Gibbs couldn’t help but stare at the darkened patch of dirt. If you looked closely, you could see the imprint of someone lying in the dirt and Gibbs couldn’t help but to wonder if it was Tony who ended up on the ground and how badly he was bleeding. Gibbs would never able to say it aloud, but it scared him shitless. 

“Agent Gibbs?” Sergeant Williams approached him from the side. “We’ve managed to get hold of the 911 caller; one of our officers will take her to the precinct if you want to talk to her there.” 

Gibbs nodded his head. By talking to the witness, they hoped they’d be able to get more information than they had currently. “McGee, Bishop. Pack it up.” He walked towards their rental. He stopped next to the trunk and waited for his two agents to join him. “Go back to Kansas and get on the first flight back to DC. Abby needs to start analyzing all of the evidence we’ve managed to collect.” 

“What about you, Boss?” McGee asked quietly. 

At first Gibbs wanted to challenge the younger man for daring to question him, but then he realized that the junior agent was just concerned. “I’m sticking around, will be helping the locals, see if I can find anything.” He clapped Tim on the shoulder. “I need you to make sure I get all the info you and Abby find ASAP.” He remained silent that Tony’s time might be running out; he knew both McGee and Bishop were well aware of that. 

“On it, Boss.” McGee placed all of the collected evidence in the trunk and got in behind the wheel. He turned to face Bishop who hopped in on the passenger side. “Find us flights back home.” He turned the key and drove off. He was glad to be going back to DC, to be surrounded by his own equipment and he knew that with Abby’s help, they would find out what had happened to Tony. He refused to think that they might be too late. Tony was still alive. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%201_zpsnmk5pwxb.jpg.html)

Abby gulped as she reached for the phone. “Come on, come on,” she chanted as she waited for the phone to be answered. “Agent Fornell,” Abby paced the floor. “You need to get to NCIS, there’s something that I need to show you.” She didn’t wait for an answer and disconnected the call. She knew that Gibbs had told Fornell about Tony’s disappearance and with the rest of the agency still believing that Tony was a horrid person, she had no one else to turn to. She wished McGee was with her, he would know what to do, but she also wished her Bossman was there, just to keep her safe, but most of all she wished Tony was there. Tony would’ve been able to make everything okay; he always did. 

She turned as the door to her lab swished open and Fornell entered. She had to smile when she noticed the Caf-Pow in his hand. 

“I know I’m not Gibbs, Miss Sciuto, but I thought you might need this.” He handed her the extra-large cup and smiled as she hugged him hard. 

“Thank you”, she took a deep swallow of the ice cold liquid and placed it near. “So, I don’t know what Gibbs told you, but I remembered the first time Tony tracked down Carmichael according to those parameters. I’ve created a program to help us find hinky chat rooms.” She indicated to the screens behind her. “About an hour ago one chat room started getting busy and they kept on using phrases that Tony indicated that he looked for the previous time. However, there was more. In the beginning the chats going on looked like they were friendly, but now it has changed.” She drew up the chats she saved to illustrate her point. 

“See, here they talk of _special times_ to follow, filled with _wonderful games_ with _close friends_.” She indicated to another paragraph. “Will be meeting between _six and ten_ , and it will be a _boys' night_.” She shivered. “Tony explained to me that all of this means it’s a closed meeting that the children are between the ages of six and ten and only boys.” She looked at Fornell. “It’s them, isn’t it?” 

Tobias sighed and nodded his head. “It’s them. It changed?” 

Abby nodded her head. “Yes. Like this.” She called up another conversation. “It’s straightforward, but although I thought that there might be a hidden meaning, I think this is it.” 

Fornell read the transcription and blanched. _“Our special times with close friends had to be cancelled due to a sudden out of state emergency. Will let everyone know when and where we’ll get together again. In the meantime, keep safe.”_ He looked at Abby. “They’re going to move the children.” He reached for his phone. “Can you get a link on the IP address? We need to find any one of these bastards, if we lose them now, we’ll never find those children.” 

“I’m busy tracking them, the signal is being bounced all around the globe but I will find it.” Abby sighed. “The out of state emergency is Tony, right?” 

Tobias nodded his head. “Yes, I think it is. The part of keeping safe is to say that they need to lay low and make sure they’re not compromised.” 

Abby was close to tears, but she managed to keep herself under control. “I will not let them get away.” She frantically started typing again. 

“Have you heard from Gibbs yet?” Tobias asked as he closed his phone. He’d been trying to get hold of the NCIS agent for the last two hours, but without success. 

Abby shook her head. “They should be at the scene about now. He said he’ll get in touch as soon as he can.” She didn’t like it, but she didn’t have a choice. She yawned and rubbed at her eyes. She’d been on her feet now for just over thirty-six hours. 

Tobias wanted to respond, but at that moment one of the computers peeped and Abby leapt from her chair. “What’s going on?” 

“I’m piggybacking on one of the people chatting on the site. His firewall on his system was sloppy and I could get in easily. Because the signal of the chat room is being bounced all over the world, I’m trying to see if I could get a fixed address on this creep via his IP address. If we’re lucky I can get a fix on the location of the chat room through his IP address.” She turned to face the screen in front of her as her fingers slid over the keys. 

Fornell stayed quietly next to her, knowing that the Goth was concentrating hard on the task. He stood with his phone in hand, ready to send teams out to go and see if they could rescue the children. His heart ached. He knew the group of pedophiles took teenagers, but the children they had now – they were still babies in his eyes. He looked up when he heard Abby speak. 

“Got them, Agent Fornell.” Her fingers continued to run over the keys but she had a smile on her face. With surety in her voice, she provided him with the address, not only of the one member of the chat room, but more importantly the address from where the original message came from. 

Even as he ran towards the exit, he shouted over his shoulder. “Thank you Miss Sciuto, I owe you!” He didn’t even hear her reply as he darted out of the lab, his phone against his ear. He had two FBI SWAT teams in Kansas on standby, another team with special permission at Andrews Air Force Base, which he would be sending over as well. His first call was short and to the point, sending both teams on their way with clear instructions to keep in touch. He made the second call just a few seconds later. “Sacks,” he spoke as his second in command answered his phone. “Get your ass down to the airport, we’re going to Kansas.” He disconnected the call and hurried out of the building. When he got into his car, he made his final call. 

_“Gibbs.”_

“Abby found us an address, Jethro. I’ve sent the teams in.” Fornell relayed the information to his best friend. 

_“What’s the address?”_

Fornell repeated the information and when Gibbs cursed in his ear, he knew the place had to be near. “We’ll meet you there.” He knew the last team wouldn’t be on time for the actual raid, the distance just too great, but they’d be there during mop up phase and he hoped there’d be some good news by then. Fornell closed the phone after Gibbs grumbled something that sounded like a confirmation. It was time to get to Kansas. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%201_zpsnmk5pwxb.jpg.html)

He had no idea what it was that brought him to awareness, but the first thing he did was gasp for air. It felt like an elephant sat on his chest and he could feel himself in desperate need of oxygen. He tried to claw at his chest in an attempt to breathe, but his arms felt heavy and he struggled to get them to his chest. He knew he had to calm down, but the need for oxygen was taking away his ability to think rationally, instead, his breathing became shallower and more erratic. A blue tint appeared on his lips and finally his eyes rolled back and he slumped backwards. The moment he lost consciousness, the constriction he felt loosened up and he started to breathe better. Blood streamed down the side of his face and the crude bandage across his thigh was tinted a deep red. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%201_zpsnmk5pwxb.jpg.html)

Zach cursed as he rounded the corner and nearly walked straight into a bunch of heavily armed police officers, some SWAT officers also stood around. He had to take a deep breath to calm himself and thanked the gods for the fact that he parked several blocks away to scout out things first before he moved in. Luckily, he’d dumped the SUV already and was now driving an inconspicuous gray Ford sedan. He moved away from the scene unnoticed. He couldn’t believe that they found the site they kept the children. He hadn’t planned to go there since Preacher said he would take care of everything, but now he was glad he did. He couldn’t help but wonder if the place they hung out was also compromised. There was only one way to find out. Zach also knew that if they discovered their hiding place, he was getting out - he wouldn’t even return for Reggie. It would be every man for himself. 

Zach couldn’t help but to wonder about the little brats. There were five boys in total. He personally made sure that none of them ever saw his face, but neither he nor Reggie ever used gloves while inside the house, and they certainly didn’t use any condoms. “Fuck!” He yelled out of frustration and then growled in anger. He knew it would be useless trying to run from the feds; eventually they always caught up and there was no place to run. But until that happened he was going to make the most of what he had. He reached for his new phone and dialed the number Preacher gave him. Zach realized that he couldn’t contact Preacher directly, not if they found the house where they kept the children. 

“We’ve been compromised,” he hissed as he kept his head low and quickly made it back to where he parked the vehicle. He huffed at the reply. “You don’t know shit. Since you became involved everything got fucked up.” He growled and then took a deep breath. “The Fed didn’t get away, we have him under control. I’ll find out what he knows, but I’m telling you, he doesn’t know anything, so this is not his cluster fuck, you’ve got someone one your tail, Carmichael, sort it out. I know Preacher said you should come to us, but not now. Stay away, I won’t deal with your shit as well.” He ended the call and wanted to scream out of frustration. He couldn’t believe that he sort of covered for a fucking Fed, but there was just no way this was Tony’s doing. They made sure to keep him in the dark. Zach knew there was one way to find out if Tony was the one who brought their house of cards down. He would go back to the house and if it was compromised, he would personally put a lead bullet in Tony’s head, never mind the fact that he planned on taking that sweet ass for a ride or two, or even ten times. 

After making sure the coast was clear, Zach got into the stolen vehicle and drove the short distance towards their first hideout. Once again, he stopped almost a mile away and made his way over to the house on foot. He sighed in relief when he finally had sight of the house and it seemed to be undisturbed. Zach looked around carefully. There were no cars lined along the street. The houses on both sides showed no signs of life and the house directly opposite seemed dark as well. All looked normal. He waited for another ten minutes before he finally made his way over to the house that was nearly falling apart. He quickly got inside and sighed when he realized that the police were not aware of this place. Without wasting time, he left the building and jogged the distance back to the sedan to drive it back to the house. He parked at the back and then silently started to pack everything. He made sure he got all of their surveillance and camera equipment. He took all of their clothes, but left the few pieces of clothing Tony had behind. It was not as if the man was going to need them again. Zach made a final sweep of the building, making sure he left nothing of importance behind before he got back into the car and drove off. There was one more thing he had to do before he could go and join Reggie at the abandoned farm. 

Half an hour later he was back at the house, Jerrycan in hand. Zach quickly doused the interior of the house with the gas and walked the perimeter and doing the same. He threw the can to the side, but kept the gloves on as he lit the first match and flicked it forward. Zach stood out of range as the flames quickly overran the building. When the inferno burned hot, he got into the car and drove off. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%201_zpsnmk5pwxb.jpg.html)

Reggie jolted awake and groaned as his body complained about where he'd fallen asleep. He looked at his watched and yawned. It seemed he was more tired than he initially thought. He slept for nearly two hours and had a feeling that Zach would be back soon. Reggie yawned again and then got to his feet. He reached for a bottle of water, stilling his thirst before he made his way down into the still brightly lit basement. 

Seeing that Tony was still pretty much out of it, he started to walk around the large area, familiarizing himself with the different items stored down there. A locked steel cabinet stood at the side, but after looking around, he found something to pry the locked door open. It was empty, except for some coils of rope. He slammed the door closed and turned when the noise he made brought a reaction from Tony. 

“You finally starting to wake up, are you?” He walked over to the large cage and rattled the iron bars. He grinned as the man inside jerked at the harsh noise and then gasped, in what he suspected was pain. Tony’s eyes still looked unfocused and Reggie shook the cage bars again. 

“Come on, wake up!” He continued shouting until it looked like Tony was finally awake enough to realize where he was. “I do hope you like your new accommodations.” He snarled. “Can’t believe I started to like you; hell, I even started to trust you.” He shook his head. “Zach was right, once a cop – always a fucking cop.” He spit into the cage with disgust. 

Tony felt like a piece of shit warmed up. His body ached and although he was still out of it and unsure of what had happened, he remembered being clipped by a vehicle. He remembered a burning sensation in his leg before the vehicle barreled down towards him, but what happened prior to that was hazy. The man screaming at him was blurred and he was unsure if it was a vision problem or a lighting problem as it looked quite gloomy from where he was lying on the floor. Something dripped from the side of his mouth and he used his hand to wipe it away. It was dark in color and the coppery taste in his mouth led him to believe that it was blood. Tony frowned as he tried to puzzle together what had happened, but his memories remained out of his grasp and the headache he sported became worse as he tried to force himself to remember. 

He looked at the man again and frowned. He couldn’t remember if he’d ever seen the man before in his life and he had no idea what happened to him. “Shut up, fuck!” He whispered with a gruff voice as the man’s voice kept on rising and rising. “You’re worse than a woman with a wet panty. Just shut up for a second.” He tried to roll onto his side, but nearly passed out as the pain assaulted him again, his leg and side competing against one another for which hurt the most. 

“Who the fuck do you think you are?!” Reggie was beside himself. He had never seen this side of Tony. He had never lost his cool like this before now. Then again, it was the first time he was bleeding and locked in a cage. Reggie took a deep breath and calmed himself down. It wouldn’t help if he killed Tony in a fit of rage. He sneered. “You’ll be screaming soon, begging for mercy as we take your ass. Have to say, I for one, can’t wait. Got something very special in mind.” Reggie grabbed his crotch. He was rock hard. 

Tony heard the words, but they were not making any sense. Instead, he tried to figure out where he was, and what was going on. For the first time he really noticed the fact that he was inside a cage. He could make out the bars that surrounded him and he frowned. He pinched his eyes closed and opened them again and found that it helped a bit to bring things into better focus. Unfortunately, the bars didn’t disappear. “Where am I?” He hated the way he sound and he tried to clear his throat, only to have his head object to the movement. “Fuck.” 

Reggie grinned. “Somewhere you’ll never be found.” He laughed aloud. “Not alive in any case.” He slammed his hand against the bars and then stepped away. “Get some rest, you’ll need it.” He mocked as he walked away. 

_“Somewhere you’ll never be found.” “Not alive in any case.”_ The words repeated in Tony’s head as he finally managed to concentrate hard only to realize that not only did have no idea where he was and in what kind of shit he was in, but he had no idea who he was and he had a feeling that whoever he was, he couldn’t have been good. Not if he was in such deep shit. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%201_zpsnmk5pwxb.jpg.html)

Gibbs sighed as the last ambulance pulled away and all that remained behind at the horrifying scene was the primary SWAT team, local officers and a reporter or two. Luckily, they’d managed to get a gag order on the press so nothing could be reported from the scene. They would make sure that no details on the boys were leaked and that they and their families would receive the necessary support to get through this hideous ordeal. The fact that they would all need therapy was a given. He shuddered as the imagines of what he witnessed when they first arrived at the scene returned. 

_The house looked like any other house in the neighborhood. A porch light brightened the front part of the yard, but the rest of the house was dark. Gibbs had arrived mere minutes after the SWAT teams and made sure he was paired with the first team as they entered the premises._

_The SWAT teams moved silently through the house. Each room was cleared before they moved on to the next. They didn’t find anything on the ground floor and the second floor was just as empty. At that stage, the teams were getting nervous. Something was not right. Gibbs had moved around the first floor looked at the walls and the ceiling above and then using hand signs indicated that they needed to go further up. Though it was well hidden, they finally found the attic door in the back bedroom. The staircase was narrow and only one person at a time could ascend to the top. Gibbs wanted to be the one to go up, but he understood it was not possible and waited. The words that came over the earpiece would’ve made the best sailor blush. The SWAT member gave the all clear to come up, but at the same time added that there wasn’t enough space for everyone. Gibbs made sure he was the first one up and now he wished he hadn’t been._

_Large animal cages line the narrow space, but instead of animals, each cage contained a child. One naked and gagged boy per cage, each one’s hands tied behind their backs with not even enough space to turn onto their sides. There was no evidence of food or water around and Gibbs couldn’t imagine how long it had been since the boys had anything to eat or drink. The air was heavy with the scent of feces, urine and the distinct smell of sex. Gibbs blocked his mind to what might have occurred and helped the SWAT team release the boys cover them with blankets and carry them down the stairs one by one. The little boy he had in his arms was the Hooper boy and wasn’t even six years old. His little body trembled and Gibbs could feel how fast his heart beat as he held him against his chest. He had even noticed, but realized later that the boy wet himself out of fear and soiled his shirt and slacks in the process._

Gibbs turned as he felt someone staring at him. He looked back and scanned the area, but couldn’t find anything out of order. He walked over to where Captain Morgan of the SWAT team was talking to one of his team members. “You still have someone recording the surrounding area?” Gibbs asked and made sure he kept himself between whoever might be at his back and the captain. 

“Yeah, I do. Spot something?” the captain asked. 

“Not sure, just have a gut feeling.” Gibbs replied and smiled as the captain nodded. 

“I know that feeling.” Captain Morgan indicated to one of his men. “I’ll make sure you get a copy ASAP when we’re done here.” 

“I appreciate it.” Gibbs would have a look at it first before he made sure it was sent to Abby. 

“I heard we were looking for an undercover agent as well. Is he one of yours?” Morgan asked. 

Gibbs nodded his head. “The best I have.” He didn’t add anything further. He didn’t want to remember they had no idea where Tony was. What bothered him more was the fact that they couldn't find one trace that Tony had even been there. He could only hope that Fornell and the third team had better luck at their location. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%201_zpsnmk5pwxb.jpg.html)

Fornell’s vehicle came to a halt and as he got out, he already had his badge in hand. The third SWAT team was already there, still at a ready for any incident as more information might become known. Nosy neighbors were hanging about, but by the look of things, everything was under control. He found Captain Kent near the assault vehicle and approached him quickly. He introduced himself and showed his ID card. “The suspect?” 

Captain Kent indicated with his head to a police vehicle parked to the side. “Safely locked up for the moment, Agent Fornell.” His eyes drifted to the house. “You want to go and have a look inside?” 

Something in the man’s voice made Fornell uneasy. “Not pretty?” 

Kent shook his head. “Not at all”, he growled and fisted his hands. “I had to restrain one of my men already, so the sooner we can get that sick bastard out of here the better.” 

“My second in command will take custody of him.” He looked over to where Sacks stood conversing with other members of the SWAT team and indicated with his head to their suspect. He turned back to face the house after Sacks acknowledged his directive. “You coming with?” He asked the captain next to him. 

Kent shook his head again. “Once was enough, thank you.” 

Fornell grunted in reply and then made his way over to the house. Everything looked normal as he stepped. The house was neat; the furniture looked well used, but still comfortable. One or two members of the crime scene unit stood around and Fornell greeted them with a nod of the head. As he stepped deeper into the house, the atmosphere around him changed. It became cold, filled with something like darkness or hate. He found a room that once would’ve been a bedroom right at the back. The door was made of solid steal, but couldn’t keep the SWAT team out when they barged in. The room was bare, except for a mattress on the floor and a large table with three different desktops on it. To the side on a chair there was a laptop, with a camcorder mounted on a tripod. The camcorder was switched on and on the laptop; he could see himself moving around in the room. The focus of the camera was on the mattress. That alone made Fornell’s skin crawl. 

A technician sat on the only other chair in the room, busy working away and Fornell walked closer. “Do I want to know?” He asked as he pulled out his ID to show it and introduce himself. 

The technician looked up and Tobias took an involuntary step backwards. It was as if he was looking into DiNutso’s eyes. They were the same vivid green and spoke volumes. “I’ll think you’ll thank me if I told you, no, but unfortunately, it’s your case from what I understand so you need to see this.” 

“Show me.” Fornell tried to take away every ounce of emotion he felt as the technician nodded his head and after a few command strokes on the keyboard keys the screen nearest to him came to life. 

“This is what he was doing when SWAT stormed the place.” The technician stood up from the chair. “You’ll excuse me if I don’t want to watch this again. Just call me when you’re done.” Without looking back or waiting for an answer, he exited the room. 

Fornell looked around, noticed that he was alone and turned his attention back to the screen. He frowned as he heard something like a children’s song coming from the speakers, while the screen itself stayed dark, slowly lighting up until a room similar to where he was came into view. More sounds came from the speakers. It sounded like children laughing. The camera zoomed out and a girl appeared on the screen; she sat on a twin bed. She couldn’t have been older than six and was naked as the day she was born. She was playing with an old doll; the doll was missing one arm and only had a few strands of hair left on her head. 

Tobias looked on as someone appeared and sat down next to the girl. The man’s face was covered with a balaclava. He started stroking the girl’s hair and you couldn’t miss the way the girl flinched at the touch, but she didn’t move away. Fornell looked on as the man leaned in and started kissing the girl. For the first time he could make out the little girl’s face. One cheekbone was bruised, while her left eye was nearly swollen shut. Dry tear streaks decorated her small face. Tobias could feel himself filling with rage. He wanted nothing more than to be able to rip apart the man he saw on the screen. He looked on as the man started to touch the girl, the seemingly innocent touches became more and when the man finally blanketed the small body beneath him, Tobias was ready to shoot someone dead. He couldn't help but to think about Emily and said a silent prayer that she was safe. He dragged his hand over his face, switched off the screen, straightened his tie and exited the room. It was time he questioned the man they took into custody; it was time they ended this soul sickening business. 


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 6**

By Zach’s stance, Reggie knew something was up. His partner looked anxious, which, with Zach’s temper was not a good combination. “What’s wrong?” 

Zach didn’t respond, instead he took the stairs down to the basement, two at a time and as Reggie descended the stairs behind him, he saw the bigger man already reaching for the cage door. Before he could utter a word, Zach grabbed the man from within and dragged him out. He started kicking at Tony, it didn’t matter to him where on Tony’s body his foot connected, but just kept on with the assault, loving the sound as his steel tipped boots made contact with the soft flesh. 

Reggie was well aware of the fact that the best way for Zach to get himself under control was to act out his anger, to get rid of all the emotions inside, but he also knew that if they wanted to play some more, he had to stop things, and he had to do it quickly. He stepped up to the big man and dragged him back. “That’s enough. What’s going on?” He had to use all of his strength to keep the enraged man from attacking Tony again. 

Zach growled, and tried to fight, but Reggie knew him well and although Reggie was smaller in stature, he was still able to keep him away from his target. “Between this fucking pig and Preacher involving Carmichael we’re in deep shit.” He sighed but balled his fists. “They found the brats.” 

Reggie shook his head. He couldn’t believe what he heard. “The children, they were found?” He looked from Zach to Tony and back to Zach again. He couldn’t get his head around the words; he had no idea what to do, or where to start. “He didn’t know.” Reggie didn’t need to say Tony’s name for Zach to know to whom he was referring to. 

“He’s still a pig.” Zach kicked at Tony’s prone body again and frowned. “Is he still alive?” He only now realized that the man on the ground had not made one sound since he started kicking him. 

Reggie shrugged, but bent down and felt for a pulse. “He’s still alive.” He got up and stared at the man beside him. “What do we do?” 

“I’ve already contacted Preacher and told him about the mess, but I’ll tell him about the kids tomorrow. I’ve taken care of where we were. There’s nothing that connects us to the kids.” 

Reggie shook his head. He knew it was not the truth. But, like Zach he didn’t think about the fact that their fingerprints and their DNA would be all over that place. He focused his attention on the Tony. “Except him.” 

Zach snorted. “And he won’t be a problem for much longer now will he?” He grinned. “I brought everything with me. Help me carry it in and then you can tell me what you’ve got planned.” 

Reggie grinned. “I’d rather show you, and then tell you. But I do promise you, you’ll enjoy it.” 

“And then we can get out of here, lay low for a few weeks, hear what Preacher wants us to do and take it from there.” Zach replied. Both men laughed while they climbed the stairs. He already decided that he wouldn’t wait for Carmichael – he would personally kill Tony. 

[ ](https://imgur.com/XTPjQgX)

“Russel Price, age forty-one, divorced – one child, a boy age five and unemployed.” Fornell read the information from the file in his hand as he leaned back in the chair. He couldn’t help but to sneer at the man across from him. He was aware of Gibbs standing to the side and wondered just how long it would take to break the piece of scum seated across from him. 

“It seemed like you had it all, Russel. I mean, just look at this. You were the CEO of your own company, you took home seven figures a year, your ex-wife headed different social societies. You yourself were the president of the golf club, you sat on the boards of different organizations, you had it all. But something went wrong, didn’t it, Russel? Something big.” Fornell slowly leaned forward and rested his elbows on the table. 

Gibbs snorted from the side as he stepped up to the table. “More like something small I would say. Something as small as your prick perhaps.” He slammed his hand on the table. “Speak up, man. Don’t just sit there and shrivel.” 

“Easy, Gibbs. Give Mr. Price a chance. You know it’s not easy being here.” Fornell had to hide his smile as Gibbs rolled his eyes at him. 

“A chance? A chance to say what? To gather his thoughts, to think out a reason to get himself out of the shit he finds himself in, to make up more lies!” He shouted as he got into Price’s face. “You’re a pathetic man, that’s what you are.” Gibbs flung the file he had in his hand across the table. 

“I didn’t do anything wrong.” Price whispered softly as he tried to keep his hands from trembling. 

“We’re not saying you did”, Fornell tried to calm the man down even though he was seething with anger. 

“Then what about what we found in that place you stayed? That camera set up on that thin mattress? That very disturbing imagery on the laptop in the house!” Gibbs bellowed out. 

Price recoiled. “It’s not mine. I’m just using it. I don’t even know what’s on it, I swear.” 

“Bullshit!” Gibbs roared. “You’ve been staying in that house for the past three months; we’ve been following you on that chat group for the past few days. We caught you red handed with child pornography on the laptop you used, so do not tell me you didn’t know. I can’t wait for you to be locked up, let you get a taste of what it’s like when the general population in jail learns why you are in there. You’ll be someone’s bitch before nightfall.” 

Russel Price swallowed hard but remained silent. He had to think; he had to find a way to get out of the mess. 

“That’s why your wife filed for divorce, isn’t it, Russel?” Gibbs whispered against the detained man’s ear. “She found out that you loved small boys and girls. Maybe she even found you with your own son and it sickened her – rightfully so, if I might add.” 

“No, no. That’s not true. I love my son, I love Deacon.” Price shook his head, his hands trembling in fear. 

“If you claim you love your son so much, then why are you looking at such filthy things? How would you feel if someone did that to your child?” Fornell added his voice to the conversation. 

Price lowered his head, When he spoke his voice was soft and Gibbs wondered if their recording equipment was finely tuned enough to pick it up. “Their little skins are so soft, it feels like silk and their smell. It’s so unique. Some people love the smell of puppies; I love the smell of babies. Their unique smell stays with them until the age of four then it starts to change, it’s no longer so enticing. Their scent gets mixed up with other people; they no longer smell like pure innocence.” 

“It’s people like you who take their innocence away!” Gibbs saw red. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. 

Price shook his head. “No, no. That’s not true.” 

Gibbs growled again and took a menacing step towards the cuffed man before Tobias stopped him. He bristled with anger but stayed put. 

Tobias had to swallow hard before he spoke again, he couldn’t stop identifying the victims with Emily at that young age. He had no idea what he would’ve done if someone molested his young baby girl in such a way. “Let’s cut to the chase. You’re in deep shit and the only way you’re going to get into a more manageable position is to cooperate with us. You’ll still be in shit, but at least you won’t be drowning in it.” 

“We’re not cutting him a deal.” Gibbs knew from the start that they would offer a deal to the slimy bastard, but he still didn’t want it to happen. But he also knew they had no choice, not if they wanted to get Tony back. 

Tobias ignored his friend for a moment and concentrated on the man seated across the table. “I agree with Agent Gibbs, there shouldn’t be a deal for you, but unfortunately for him and for me, the powers that be have spoken.” He leaned back against the wall. “You see, you’re just one of the small fishes in the sea and we want the bigger ones. And you’re the person who’s going to give them to us.” 

Price shook his head. “I didn’t do anything wrong, I know nothing.” 

Tobias didn’t even try to stop his friend as Gibbs swept past him and grabbed Price by his shirt, yanking him clear of his chair and slamming him hard into the wall. He knew that not one of the observers in the next room would interfere. They all wanted to get a piece of this sickening thing that masqueraded as a human being. 

Gibbs slammed Price hard into the wall, pulled him forward and slammed him against the wall for a second time. He heard something snap and hoped it was one of Price’s back ribs, the bastard deserved a bit of pain. “You don’t seem to understand, you don’t have a choice. Either you cooperate, or I will personally ensure that every inmate in every penitentiary in this country knows who you are and what you’ve done. You have supervised visitation with Deacon right now. I will make sure that you never see your son again, not for as long as you’re alive and I will make sure that he really comes to realize just what a monster you are. People like you don’t deserve to be parents. You don’t deserve to have a son.” 

“You can’t do that.” Price swallowed hard, he had to see Deacon. His boy was his life. 

“Watch me.” Gibbs barked and shoved the man back into his chair. “You better tell us everything.” 

Price looked at the two men across from him. His breath hitched, his head throbbed from where it connected with the wall, his back ached. He couldn’t tell them what they wanted to know, he was scared. They would kill him. He flinched as the one with the temper stepped away from the wall and headed in his direction again. Price looked on as the man walked to the door and opened it. He could make out another figure on the outside. The color drained from his face when the agent spoke. 

“Get me a camera, I want to take a few good photos of Mr. Price and get me Child Services on the line, I need to speak to them as well.” Gibbs closed the door and without looking at Price took his place up against the wall once more. 

“Time is ticking, Price. My colleague here has been patient so far. Trust me, you don’t want to test his patience.” Fornell turned to look at Gibbs. “At least give it another few moments. We don’t even know where he would be placed until after his arraignment.” 

“No, I don’t think so. The sooner I get his picture out, the sooner he can become someone’s bitch, just what he deserves.” With the knock at the door, Gibbs pulled away from the wall and collected both the camera and a phone held out to him. 

“Child services on line two.” 

Gibbs grunted something out that sounded like a thanks and pressed the phone against his ear. “This is Agent Gibbs from NCIS.” 

“NO! Wait, I’ll talk, please.” Price reached forward as if to grab the phone from Gibbs’ grasp. 

Gibbs pulled the phone from his ear, but didn’t disconnect the call. “Start talking.” 

“Don’t take away my time with my son, please.” Price begged. 

“Start talking” Gibbs sneered. 

“Okay, okay. I will.” Price gulped and then started to talk. 

[ ](https://imgur.com/XTPjQgX)

****

**WARNING: Graphic rape scene in this section!**

Reggie grinned as he looked at the scene before him. He had told Zach what he’d intended to do and was more than surprised when Zach was even more excited about what they were going to do than him. Zach went as far to build a few more props for them with some pieces of wood they found lying around in one of the outbuildings. Now they were set to start. 

Zach stood naked a balaclava covered his head. His cock was semi erect and he gently stroked himself as he looked at his handy work. “Going to love this.” He grinned at Reggie and posed as his partner took the camcorder and walked around the room. At first, they only wanted to live stream everything, but then decided they would record it and make different segments later. Reggie had the expertise on electronics and they’d already linked up with different groups on which they would do the live thing and some of the sites’ owners already indicated that depending on the quality they were willing to buy extra segments of what Reggie and Zach had planned later. Zach couldn’t help but to grin. The people who signed up knew what the end result would be – their sites buried so deep within the realms of the computer world that tracking them would be nearly impossible and they strived for only one thing – the bloodier and the darker the better. And what they had planned; well that certainly fit the bill. 

“You ready?” Reggie asked as he pulled the balaclava over his head. The tattoos he had were covered, their bodies deprived of any identifying marks. Ready as can be.” Zach watched as Reggie made a few minor changes on the settings of the cameras they were using before Reggie also stepped out from behind the cameras. Both men started to circle their prey. Tony was strung up against the St Andrew’s cross – facing outward. His wrists, waist and feet securely tied to the post. He had a makeshift ball gag in his mouth, his eyes covered with a rag and he was as naked as the day he was born. They had cleaned off the blood, but left the numerous injuries untreated, wanting to show their audience that all was real. They decided not to show his face just to make it a bit more intriguing, although they did indicate that their _guest_ was a federal agent. 

Both men made sure to give their viewers an unobstructed view as they started to circle around Tony, caressing his body with soft touches, but pressing harder, becoming more invasive with each passing second. 

Zach had brought something else with him when he returned. He’d already injected the cloudy substance into Tony’s body and knew that the adrenaline-based drug, mixed with other illegal components would wake any person up, even someone near death’s door. It caused hell on the body, and if one managed to survive the torture that was dealt out, the chances of surviving the drug was almost zero. It was not recommended for more than one use, but he personally knew of instances where it was used twice on a man and he was going to do the same with Tony. He wanted – he needed Tony to be awake; to be aware of what they were going to do with him. 

It was Reggie, who noticed the change in Tony’s breathing first and grabbed hold of his hair, pulling his head back. “Finally waking up again, are you? Just in time for a bit of fun.” He moved in behind Tony and rubbed his body against Tony’s. “Feels good, can’t wait to fuck you raw.” He snorted; Zach demanded to be first and knew that he couldn’t wait to see Tony hanging from Zach’s dick. With Tony’s hair still in his hand, he yanked Tony’s head sideways and bit hard into his chin. He would’ve loved to bite Tony’s lips, but the gag made it impossible. He suckled at the blood as his teeth broke the thin skin and tightened his grip when Tony finally felt the pain and tried to pull away. He kept on biting before he finally let go and moved away. Zach was there in an instant, grabbing Tony by the hair. 

Tony awoke to hands touching him. They caressed and smoothed his skin, but the hands also pinched and slapped. Pleasure mixed with pain and with his heart beating fast he finally managed to open his eyes, but everything was shrouded in darkness and as he tried to make sense of what was happening, the bit of pleasure he experienced morphed into searing pain. He tried to pull away, but the hand attached to his head held fast. He tried to groan, only to become aware of the obstruction in his mouth and then he began to struggle hard. His movement was limited, the bindings around his wrists and ankles shaved against his skin, making it red with irritation. 

“Keep still, bitch.” A voice spoke into his ear before he shuddered as something cold and wet dipped into his ear. He tried to move away, but earned it only earned him a fist punch to the side of the head. It made his body jerk and then he screamed as he jarred his leg. Tony had no idea what was wrong, what was going on, but the pain kept on increasing, the touches become more intimate and it didn’t matter how hard he tried to get away, he only got knocked around and sneered at. 

Zach had to admit, he loved the way the Fed fought against them. It made his blood boil with lust. He never was one to take what he wanted with gentle touches. To be able to have a fight on his hands with the man tied before him made him roar with power. Tony would submit - they all did. “Fuck,” he hissed as Tony managed to clip him with the head, making him nick his bottom lip with a tooth. He spit to the side and watched as the droplet of blood mixed with saliva drop to the concrete floor. His fist found Tony’s battered body with ease and he grinned behind the mask as the weakened ribs gave way beneath his hand. “Gonna fuck you now.” He yanked Tony’s hair back and bit him hard on the side of the neck. He could feel the coppery taste of Tony’s blood on his tongue. He let go of Tony’s head for a moment, moving in behind the beaten man and squeezed his ass hard. “You’ve got a nice ass, pig. It’s a pity I will not be able to use you again and again.” Zach sniggered, although, I may be too hard on myself. There will be one more time for me to use you. I always wanted to star in a snuff film.” He laughed at his own joke, before he pulled Tony’s cheeks apart and thrust forward. “Fuck, you’re tight,” he groaned ignoring the muffled screams from the man he raped as he pushed his hard cock into the un-prepped channel. It was almost impossible, but with a hard push, Zach managed to bottom out and he sighed. “This is going to be even better than what I hoped.” He pulled back and then pushed himself back in before he set up a hard pace. The blood that coated his dick act as lubrication as he fucked Tony hard. 

The screams kept on pouring from his lips, the sounds dulled behind the gag. His throat felt raw, but it dimmed in relation to what was happening to his body. He could feel the tears running down his face, the blood dripping down the insides of his thighs. Tony tried to fight again. His cock was hard, but he didn’t want it. He could feel himself being ripped to pieces, every now and again something dragged over his prostate, making his cock sing with pleasure. His body was betraying him; it made it all so confusing. He really didn’t want to be there, he felt ill. Tony couldn’t understand why his body was hard, why it felt like he could erupt at any moment, while on the other hand, it burned, it ached and it made him scream with fear. He tried to distance himself from what was happening to him. He tried to step away from the pain that ravished his body, tried to find that single part of him to disconnect from what was happening, to disappear into nothingness to go where no one could find him; to vanish within himself. Something snapped – silence filled him. For a moment, he saw a set of green eyes before him and then they blurred into nothingness. He could feel the hands on him, he could feel what was being done to him, but it didn’t matter, it wasn’t happening to him. He wasn’t there. It wasn’t him; it happened years ago, it was not happening now. 

_Tony shivered and tried to make himself even smaller as he hid underneath his bed. He could hear his father’s footsteps coming up the stairs and he closed his eyes. “Please don’t come in, please don’t come in.” He whispered the words softly and held his breath as a shadow appeared underneath his door. For what felt like a long time, the shadow remained and Tony gently released the breath he held. His father never took so long if he planned to come in his room. He gasped as the door flung open and even before he could scramble away a hand reached in and yanked him out from under the bed. Tony tried to get away, he bucked, he used his hands, his teeth, but the hand struck hard and he tasted his own blood as it filled his mouth. “Please, Father, please.” He whimpered, but the man paid him no attention. He was thrown on the bed and before he could scramble away, his pajama pants were pulled down and his was flipped on his stomach. He could feel his father’s hands on his hips, they were on his bottom, they pulled his cheeks apart and as Tony screamed, his father pushed forward and inward. It burned, it hurt and he screamed and screamed._

Zach came undone with a massive roar, his seed spilled deep inside the lax body before him, his hips kept on twitching until they finally came to a halt. He leaned with his head against the shoulder blades and then frowned. “Don’t tell me you’re dead.” He reached out with his hand and felt for a pulse. It was slow and nearly impossible to feel, but it was there and that was all that mattered. “Not such a big ass now are you, Tony?” He stepped backwards, his softened cock sliding out of Tony’s abused hole. He looked on as his cum, mixed with blood dripped down. “Popped your cherry good.” 

Reggie had himself in hand, his cock pulsating hard as he looked on while Zach fucked Tony. Never before did he think he’d be in a position to watch something as barbaric as this and get off on it – it was perfect. He grunted and emptied himself all over his hand, his stomach and the floor. He stumbled forward once before catching himself. He looked over his shoulder to one of the cameras and smiled. Only his lips and eyes were visible though the hood over his face, but his smile was feral and the look in his eyes gleamed with lust. He wanted in. “Help me lower him.” He fisted his cock again, feeling it twitch in his hand. 

Zach nodded and with Reggie’s help, released him from the cross and gently lowered a nearly unconscious Tony to the floor. “How do you want him?” 

“Flat on his back. Going to use that mouth of his.” Reggie reached for a gag ring which was in his duffle. He used it on the bigger children and although it wouldn’t stretch Tony’s mouth as wide as it did the brats, it would make sure that Tony couldn’t bite him. 

Zach watched as Reggie pulled the rag from Tony’s mouth. It was blood soaked, but he didn’t care. He reached for another syringe and showed it to the camera. “Think he needs something again, don’t you?” The fight that Tony displayed at the beginning was gone; Tony was now lying limp on the floor. “Don’t think it would be good if you don’t fight, even if it is in vain.” 

Reggie grinned when Zach emptied the syringe into Tony’s arm. He’d seen the effect it had on Tony the first time, he wanted to feel Tony beneath him, wanted the larger man to fight against him, but still not be able to get away. He didn’t have to wait long. 

Tony tried to stay hidden, tried to keep himself within the darkness, but something clawed at him to come out, to come and play and he couldn’t stop it. He felt himself gasp for air and all of a sudden, everything around him was too much. The thing that was stuffed into his mouth was removed, it was replaced by something else; something that stretched his mouth open, that made him feel exposed in a way he didn’t know was possible. Even though he knew his eyes were open, he still couldn’t see, but he could feel hands touching him again, his body betraying him as his cock twitched. It didn’t make sense; he wished he could make it stop – make it go away. 

“I thought all Feds were fat.” Zach trailed the livid bruises that decorated Tony’s body. He made sure the cameras had a clear view as he traced Tony’s chest, twisted his nipples hard and even used his fist to twist Tony’s cock. He grinned as the man on the floor groaned in pain, but his cock remained stiff. 

Reggie laughed. “Think it’s more the cops that are fat, never seen a fat Fed before. Not that I keep company with them.” He kneeled at Tony’s head, rose to his knees and stroked his cock a few times before he leaned forward. “Open wide.” He laughed at his little joke as he pushed his cock past Tony’s stretched lips. “Fuck, it feels good.” Reggie moved forward, kneeling over Tony as he thrust downward, feeding his cock in and out of Tony’s mouth. 

“Take him deep; want to see your dick bulging in his throat.” Zach’s voice sounded from the side. He had his own cock in his hand, jerking himself hard, wanting a second go. Normally he didn’t share, but he thought it would look for the camera and their viewers if they ended this with a bang and what better way than to end it with a spit roast. 

The words drifted through to him and he felt something pressing down on his tongue, going deeper down his throat. He tried to swallow around it, but his airway closed up and he started to struggle. 

“There you go, that’s what we want to see.” Reggie gripped Tony’s head as he tried to keep him down, while forcing his cock down Tony’s throat. He loved the noises that escaped from Tony’s mouth. They sounded desperate and he wanted to hear more. He withdrew his cock, slapped Tony hard before straddling Tony’s chest, lifting his head and pushing his cock back into Tony’s mouth. This time he used his hands to guide Tony’s mouth. To take him deeper, harder, faster. He pushed forward, shuddered as his cock slipped down Tony’s throat. He could feel Tony’s airway constrict around him, but he didn’t care. Tony struggled hard, but with his hands tied behind his back, his one leg broken the other sporting a bullet hole made it nearly impossible for Tony to fight back. Reggie loved the way Tony’s face changed color, it turned red, became deeper, turned to purple and when his body started to seize Reggie withdrew his cock and locked on as Tony gasped for air. “Lovely, so fucking good.” He only gave Tony a few seconds respite before he forced his cock back down Tony’s throat. He was aware that Zach was behind him as he pistoned forward. 

“Going to fuck him again.” Zach spoke up as he kneeled between Tony’s legs and pushed them back towards Tony’s chest. He had one of the camcorders in his hands. He zoomed in at Tony’s bloody hole. It still oozed with blood and he used his finger to push it back. His breath hitched as Tony’s body sucked the finger right in. “Just look at that, he’s such a slut. He wants this.” He finger fucked Tony’s hole, replacing the one finger with two and then three. “Let’s do this.” He placed the camcorder between his legs, made sure that he didn’t obscure the lens and then eased himself into Tony again. “Still so fucking tight.” He set up a fast pace and grinned when Reggie followed suit. They fucked Tony in tandem, their moans and groans filling the room as each one of them chased their own release. 

Tony tried to hide in his mind again, but the stuff that traveled through his body didn’t want to let him go, it made him stay in the present. He felt every thrust and pull, he heard the words spoken to him, spoken about him and as they pillaged his body, his memories returned. When he finally remembered what had happened, who he was, he screamed again as his mouth got filled with cock and bucked upwards unsettling both Reggie and Zach for a second before they regained their balance and continued to use him hard. 

“So feisty,” Reggie laughed as he had to right himself when Tony managed to buck him off. “Makes me even harder.” He tightened the hold he had on Tony’s head and as his balls tightened up, and his spine tingled with need he let go and found release in his pleasure, his seed spurting down Tony’s throat, making the man cough beneath him, but Reggie couldn’t care. He was flying high. 

Zach had slammed his fist into the bullet wound on Tony’s thigh when the man managed to buck up, and laughed as he pushed deep into Tony’s unwilling body again. He could see by Reggie’s movements that the other man was racing to the finish line and it spurred him on. His orgasm slammed into him as Reggie’s voice reached his ears, both men yelled out their pleasure, riding their waves of bliss to the end and then slumped forward breathing hard. 

“FUCK!” Reggie shouted out as he raised his arms up. “Best fucking time of my life!” He got up, not even bothering to check if Tony was still breathing and staggered to the cameras. He turned one of the cameras on him and grinned. “That’s all folks, hope you enjoyed!” He ended the scene and went offline. The counter showed they had more than a hundred hits. For some this might sound small, but in their world, it was huge. Already he could see comments flying around on the chatroom he set up just for this. He couldn’t wait to see what the responses were. 

Zach gingerly came to his feet. He could see that Tony was still breathing, therefore still alive, but his breathing was irregular, his body jerking heavily and he knew that the end was near – Tony would not survive this night. “We won’t be able to use him again, he’s almost dead.” There was no hint of emotion in his voice. 

Reggie looked up and then shrugged his shoulders. “Just too bad. Are we leaving him here, or do you want to dump him somewhere else?” 

“Need to hose him down first, and then we can dump him. We’ve touched too many things here to get it all clean. It will be better just to clean him off and dump him.” Zach reached for a rag and quickly cleaned his cock. “We also need to get cleaned up.” 

Reggie nodded his head. “Good, let me reply to some of these comments and I’ll help you clean out the trash.” 

“Got some good hits?” Zach asked as he searched for his trousers. 

“More than one who wants to see more.” 

“Not with him.” Zach looked over his shoulder. He couldn’t see Tony’s chest rising and falling anymore. “Looks like he’s dead.” 

Reggie looked up. “Seriously?” He looked around Zach. “Ah, shit. And I wanted to fuck him again. Too bad.” He went back to what he was doing on the keyboard and with a few strokes, he completed what he wanted to do and shut the laptop down. “Clean up and then clean him up and dump him?” 

“Sounds like a plan.” Zach grinned. “You’re a genius with that computer of yours, let’s put one final nail into his coffin.” He looked at Tony’s prone body. 

“He’s dead.” Reggie frowned. 

“He was a plant, so someone’s going to want to make a hero out of him. So let’s tarnish his image properly.” 

“What do you want to do?” Reggie sounded curious. 

“You remember those photos we took when he buried those brats?” Zach smiled when Reggie connected the dots. 

“He’ll be the star of that show and no one will ever believe he didn’t do anything.” Reggie wanted to start immediately but looked up as Zach halted him with a hand. 

“Let’s get out of here first. I also have to contact Carmichael.” 

Reggie frowned. “Why?” 

“He wanted to come over, wanted his turn with Tony. But that’s not possible now is it? It suits me better in any case. The longer he stays away from us the better.” 

“Why?” 

Zach shook his head. “He’s a pedophile of note, I can promise you he already dumped his parole officer, we don’t want him near us. Not for as long as possible in any case”. 

“What about Preacher?” Reggie asked as he picked up his equipment and started to pack up. 

“I’ll handle Preacher, don’t worry.” Zach gathered the rest of their stuff and headed up the stairs. They would be out of the place within half an hour. Neither man saw Tony’s hand twitched for a second before it went limp again. 


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 7**

“What do you got, Abs?” Gibbs placed the Caf-Pow next to her and kissed her on the temple. 

“Okay, so you know I had to go through all of those recordings of you and Agent Fornell with that creep Price, and I have to say I’m very disappointed Gibbs.” Abby paced the room. 

“Why?” Gibbs asked in his clipped way. 

“Not once did you assault him. I thought that you’d at least rip one of his arms off.” Abby wrung her hands. 

“I did slam him against the wall, Abby, twice.” Something that Price’s lawyers were now trying to use to get the man off. At this stage, they were not having much luck. 

“Yeah, right.” She shook her head. “It was not enough, Gibbs. It was not enough.” She swiped angrily at her face, trying to get rid of the tears that once again smeared her face. 

Gibbs sighed as he pulled her into his embrace. “He doesn’t know where Tony is, Abby, or who has him. Even if I tortured him, he wouldn’t have been able to tell us, because he just doesn’t know. But what he did tell us, we’re going to use in finding Tony.” 

Abby hugged Gibbs once more before she stepped back. “And that’s what I hate about him. He’s scary strange, Gibbs. I mean, if you had to meet him on the street you would’ve never suspected what he did, what he thinks he is entitled to.” She approached one of the computer screens and started typing. “So, as you know he gave up various groups and forums up that dealt with child porn. Some of these sites have shut down, but that’s not strange as they usually don’t run for long periods of time.” Abby called up a screen of a chat room from what Gibbs could see was still active. 

The FBI is monitoring this site. It’s also one Price chatted on regularly. They’re indicated that they will keep on monitoring the site and they are aware that we’re also playing on it.” Abby shuddered. “I hate talking to them, Gibbs.” 

“I know, Abby.” The apology remained unsaid, but both of them knew it was there. 

“Any sign of Carmichael yet?” 

“There’s a guy lurking in the shadows, we all can see he is online and there, but he never says anything. Normally that raises suspicion, especially in groups like this, but no one said a word about it, so I have a feeling it might be him.” 

“What handle is he using?” Gibbs frowned. 

“Daddysboy102.” Abby pulled up the copies she made of the last chat, with the screen shots. 

Gibbs growled. “That’s him.” 

How do you know?” 

“Because he’s taunting us, Abs, that’s why.” It was Gibbs’ turn to pace the floor. 

Abby remained silent, she knew Gibbs would tell her when he was ready. 

“After we caught him and he was down in interrogation, Tony took lead. He had to see the matter through. Tony easily managed to get under that bastard’s skin, but Carmichael managed to get under Tony’s skin as well.” Gibbs dragged his hand through his hair. 

“At one stage he started analyzing Tony’s childhood. Tony tried to ignore him, to focus on what we wanted, but then Carmichael said something and Tony snapped. It took three of us to get him off Carmichael, Abby.” 

Abby frowned. “Why haven’t I heard of this before?” 

“Because I made sure it didn’t get out, Abby. Tony didn’t need to be the topic of the scuttlebutt. He never said a word about it afterwards, not to me and as far as I know, not to anyone else. I tried to ask him about it, but he made it clear that topic was off limits.” 

“What did Carmichael say that made Tony snap?” 

Gibbs looked at the screen for a long time before he finally spoke up again. “Tony had been grilling Carmichael for almost four hours straight. At one point, he hammered on the fact that as a psychologist Carmichael was in a trust relationship with the victims; like a second father. He was supposed to protect those children, not to abuse them the way he did. Carmichael analyzed Tony’s childhood while Tony was grilling and the two of them collided. I remember that Carmichael smirked and said something in the line of Tony must’ve been daddy’s special boy.” 

Abby swallowed hard. “Gibbs?” 

Gibbs shook his head. “I don’t know, Abby and I’m not going to speculate.” He didn’t say anything about how he more than wondered about the abuse Tony suffered at the hand of Anthony DiNozzo Senior – if it was much worse than just the emotional abuse of which they were aware. 

Abby wanted to say more, but the look on Gibbs’ face made her to remain silent. Instead, she focused her attention back on the screen. “If that’s him, then we can trace his location the next time he comes online to chat.” 

“What time will that be?” 

“This site is normally quite active from about five in the afternoon until about nine.” 

Gibbs looked at his watch. “Where is the chat site located?” 

“We’ve been getting a steady ping from Kansas.” Abby brought up a map that showed the radius from where the IP address was previously pinged. “The radius and area stay the same, but it’s clear that the host of the site moves around. It’s a tactic they employee to keep law enforcement agencies off their backs.” 

Gibbs stared at the screen for a long time. Something told him that Kansas was in the middle of everything concerning this case. “Tony’s still there.” 

Gibbs cleared his throat. “Did you get a copy of the SWAT teams’ recordings of the different raids, Abby?” 

“Yeah, it came through. I still need to analyze it. Anything specific I need to be on the lookout for, Gibbs?” 

“Anything or anyone hinky, Abby.” Gibbs turned without another word. He had a plan to put together. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%205_zpsluzs8lrb.jpg.html)

“Ten years, final deal.” ADA Baxter placed the sheet of paper in front of Price and his legal representative. 

Price looked at his council for a long time and then nodded his head. “Deal.” 

Gibbs shoved the laptop in front of Price. “Start talking.” 

“Not before we have our indemnity in our hands.” Price’s council spoke up. 

Gibbs growled, the ADA sighed and Fornell just rolled their eyes. He looked on as Gibbs stormed towards the door just as it opened and McGee entered with another sheet of paper. 

Without saying a word, Gibbs grabbed the paper and a pen from his pocket and slammed it on the table. “Sign and get chatting.” 

This time no one made an objection and Price turned his attention to the screen. “It’s going to take me a while.” 

“I don’t care, as long as you get in contact with Carmichael.” Fornell responded first. 

“My client does not know a person by that name, Agent Fornell.” 

“Listen, you can call him whatever you want, on this site he’s known as Daddysboy102. Get him chatting and get it done ASAP.” Gibbs gave a menacing step forward. 

“No need to become threatening, Agent Gibbs.” 

“I promise you, I’m not becoming threatening. Just do what you have to, Price.” Gibbs didn’t wait for a reply, but with Tobias on his heels both men made their way out of the interrogation room. They’d already cleared it with both directors and had a plane on standby to take them back to Kansas. As soon as they got a fix on Carmichael Gibbs and the rest of the team would hunt him down. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%205_zpsluzs8lrb.jpg.html)

Tobias looked on as Gibbs paced the room like a caged lion. Around them, a team of agents worked through the house, picking every little thing apart, leaving nothing untouched. Price had managed to coax the allusive Daddysboy102 into chatting, which lead them to this place. However, for one or other reason it seemed like Carmichael got spooked and by the time they arrived at the address he was already gone. It was clear that they’d missed him by mere minutes. The coffee in the mug on the kitchen counter was still warm. 

“Agent Gibbs, you’ll want to take a look at this.” One of the agents called out as he closed the gap between them and handed Gibbs an old map. Several marks were on the map and Gibbs recognized two of the places as the addresses they raided only a few days ago. 

“Find out what’s here.” Gibbs indicated to one of the marks that were in close proximity to the two raided houses. He frowned at the fourth mark. It was well out of the city and it showed no specific address, only to note that it was farmland. Without further ado, he pulled out his phone. He didn’t give McGee a chance to greet properly before he started barking orders. 

“I need to know what’s at the following location.” He rattled off the coordinates and waited impatiently for McGee to give him the information. 

_“Boss, it’s farmland, and according to what I can see here it’s been abandoned for the last twelve years. It looks like a company that went bankrupt owned the land. I’ll have to look deeper to find out more.”_

“Do that, McGee.” Gibbs ended the call and turned to Fornell. “Let’s go.” 

Tobias frowned but moved along. “Where to?” 

“This place.” Gibbs jabbed his finger against the map. 

“Why?” 

“Because we’ve already searched these two places. I have a feeling this third one will be relevant AND it’s near to the pay phone Tony used last. This has to be connected.” He slapped the map against Fornell’s chest as he got into the driver’s seat. He didn’t even give his friend enough time to close the passenger door before he pulled away. 

Tobias nodded his head. Gibbs’ theory made sense and he had a feeling that Gibbs’ gut may also be involved. “Let me get some additional units to meet us there.” 

Gibbs only grunted in reply as they headed into the night to the abandoned land. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%205_zpsluzs8lrb.jpg.html)

“Someone has been here, and very recently by the look of things.” Tobias used a gloved hand to pick up a discarded water bottle. Several of them were lying around the large area that he would describe as the living room. There were food wrappers strewn around as well. 

Gibbs frowned as he looked around and then headed deeper into the house. They’d done a cursory sweep of the rooms and found them to be empty. “Basement”, he called out as he spotted the door to the side of the kitchen. Weapons drawn, both men made their way down the narrow stairs. They found the space eerily empty. Tobias cursed when he saw a dark wet patch in one corner and found it to be blood. 

“Tony was here.” His gut screamed it out as he looked on with anguish as he took the room in. The large cage in the corner, together with the weird looking cross to the side didn’t sit well with him. 

“Its blood and a lot of it.” Tobias rubbed his gloved fingers together as he tried to rid himself of the ruby red liquid that coated his finger. 

Gibbs’ gut churned. He didn’t need to have the blood analyzed to know it was Tony’s. “Where the hell are you, DiNozzo?” He sighed out of frustration as he started to search the large space. He kneeled to the side and indicated with his hand. “There are two distinguishing sets of prints here.” He followed the shoe prints with his eyes as he tracked their movements through the room. Gibbs got up and moved towards the place where most of the tracks came together. It was in almost the same spot where Tobias found the blood. 

“They tortured him.” Tobias couldn’t help to make the remark. 

“And I think they might have left him for dead.” He knew they wouldn’t let Tony survive. Gibbs reached for his phone again. He had to find out the square footage of the land. The fact that this place was abandoned, led him to believe that whoever took Tony would see this as a perfect burial place as well. 

“DiNutso is not dead.” Tobias sounded gruff. 

“I know that, Tobias. I’m just saying they left him for dead. Tony’s still alive - they don’t know him. He doesn’t have permission to die – he’s not dead.” Gibbs couldn’t help but to close his eyes and pray for a second. Tony had to be alive. 

“I need a search and rescue unit.” Gibbs relayed what they found when the first of the backup officers made their way down the stairs. “This scene needs to be processed as well.” He had little hope that they’d find something useful down in the basement, but hoped that the emptied water bottles might contain prints or DNA; hopefully both. He hated the fact that they still had no idea who had Tony. He could only hope that they’d get results soon. 

Gibbs worked in tandem with the crime scene unit, gathering possible evidence and taking the necessary photos of the scene. With Vance’s help he arranged that all evidence be sent directly to Abby so that she could work her magic. 

“Dogs are here.” Tobias called out at the top of the stairs and stood to the side as Gibbs took them two by two. They exited the house and Fornell looked on as Gibbs reached for an evidence bag. When Gibbs passed it to a Sergeant with a large Alsatian dog next to him, Tobias realized what Gibbs brought with him. 

“It’s the best I’ve got.” He handed over the bag and looked on as it was opened it for the dog to smell. The other three dogs took in the scent as well and within minutes all four dogs started sniffing around. 

“How did you know to bring that along?” 

“Because it’s Tony, Tobias. With him anything is possible; I needed to be prepared.” Gibbs responded and turned around when one of the dogs yelped with excitement. “Let’s go.” He didn’t wait for Fornell and started jogging behind the handler and his dog. 

Tobias was unaware how long they jogged. Once or twice it looked like the dog had lost the scent, only to pick it up a few moments later again. It was tiring, but the group never slowed down as they made their way deeper onto the property. 

All of a sudden, the dog started to go wild and the handler had to pull back hard on the leash so the dog wouldn’t get away. “Found something.” 

Gibbs took one look at the mound of dirt and felt his knees go weak. He willed himself to stay up right. “We need shovels.” He barked the orders as he finally gave in and landed hard on the ground. Even as the dog tried to dig on the one side, Gibbs was already busy on the other. He was dimly aware of the others using their hands as well to uncover the mound of dirt. 

Time stood still as Gibbs and the rescue team dug deeper. They had no idea what they were going to find, each man and woman praying for the best. 

“Here!” Tobias shouted out as he uncovered a hand. Soon more of the body became visible and they could see by the bone structure that it was a man. He was laying face down, one arm folded under his head while the other stretched out beside him. 

“Tony,” Gibbs whispered as he recognized the mop of dark hair, although covered in dirt. He reached for the hand and with trembling fingers, he felt for a pulse. “He’s alive.” He sighed as he felt the soft beat against his fingers. “We need to get him out of here.” 

“Let us have a look, Agent Gibbs.” One of the rescuers gently pushed the older man to the side as they started to assess Tony’s condition. 

Gibbs couldn’t believe how Tony looked. There wasn’t a place on his body that wasn’t bruised. The dirt covering made it impossible to get an accurate look at what else was wrong, but he did note the broken bone, the gaping wound on his thigh. He also noticed the bruising – clear visible hand prints on Tony’s thighs that made him boil in anger. He looked up and saw the same expression he suspected was on his own face as he looked to Tobias. 

“We’ll find them Gibbs. They will pay for this.” Tobias forgot about his badge and the fact that he was a federal agent. In that moment, he wanted nothing but revenge. He moved over to his friend as the Medevac helicopter approached with the sun rising behind it. It was the start of a new day and the fact that they found Tony still alive meant it was going to be a good one. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%205_zpsluzs8lrb.jpg.html)

“Gibbs!” Abby shouted as she rounded the corner and found her silver fox seated on a plastic hospital chair. She didn’t slow down, just barreled towards him and hugged him hard. “How is he, Gibbs? How is Tony?” 

Gibbs stood up and held her close. He waited for the rest of the team to catch up with them before he spoke up. “He’s still in surgery, I don’t know how much longer he’ll be in there.” 

“What do the doctors say, Jethro?” Ducky asked. 

Gibbs wanted to growl, but knew it wouldn’t help. “Not much of what they said made sense, Duck. But what I did understand…” he sighed, he couldn’t say it sounded bad. “I don’t know.” 

Abby pressed her face against Gibbs’ shirt; her body shook as she wept. 

“He’ll make it, Abigail. Young Anthony will make it.” Ducky tried to console her and the rest of the people standing around them. 

“Duck, will you try and find out what’s going on? I’m ready to shoot someone if they tell me once again that I just have to be patient.” Gibbs sat down again and pulled Abby so that she sat on the chair next to him. 

“Of course, Jethro.” Ducky nodded his head and made his way down the hall where he spotted a nurse’s station. They all needed to know what was going on. 

“Anything we can do, Boss?” McGee asked quietly. He was the last to arrive. He had to wait for the evidence to come in from the third area on the map they found in Carmichael’s place. It had turned out to be a house – burned to the ground. The forensic team managed to find some pieces of evidence that might be of assistance. 

Gibbs shook his head. He was aware McGee worked through the past couple of nights and that any tests that needed to be run, or information that needed to be found would still be there in a couple of hours. 

“I’ll get us some coffee.” Bishop spoke up for the first time. She was still finding her place in the team, but knew that Gibbs would appreciate a cup right about now. 

“Sounds good, Bishop.” Gibbs smiled his thanks as the young probationary agent nodded and made her way back from the direction they came. He wasn’t surprised to see McGee going after her. He knew Timothy felt uneasy around him; especially in such situations like this. 

“What injuries did he have, Gibbs?” Abby asked. She had to know, she had to prepare herself for whatever may come. 

At first, Gibbs didn’t want to answer, but he knew Abby had the right to know; their whole team had a right to know. He had to clear his throat a couple of times before he finally managed to speak. He tried to keep it clinical as he recalled what he heard the EMTs say as they transported Tony to the nearest trauma center. “Right lower leg broken, GSW to the left thigh. At least five fractured ribs, the same number broken.” He swallowed hard. “He was clearly tortured; he’d sustained a nasty head injury as well. He was not breathing on his own by the time we arrived here.” Gibbs remained silent on what he suspected might be sexual abuse. He didn’t think Tony would want anyone to know about that. He also knew that Abby would not be able to handle that kind of information. 

Abby wanted to reply when she spotted Ducky coming their way. “Ducky?” 

Ducky smiled softly as he took a seat next to his best friend. “Anthony is still in surgery, but so far all is going well. He’s holding on.” 

“Do we know how long he’ll be in there, Ducky?” Abby inquired. 

“At least another few hours, Abigail. From there he will go to recovery and then to ICU. I doubt that we’ll be able to see him anytime today.” He looked up at Gibbs. “I did however, make arrangements for you to see him once he’s settled, Jethro. I was informed no longer than five minutes, but I believe you’ll use that five minutes wisely.” 

Abby frowned at Ducky’s words, but Gibbs only nodded. He knew exactly what the man next to him meant and he was indeed going to use those few precious minutes wisely. He would make sure Tony knew how he felt about him and he would say it every day until Tony was awake and in a condition to understand his words, he would not remain silent any more. He loved Tony and it was time Tony knew that as well. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%205_zpsluzs8lrb.jpg.html)

**Bethesda Hospital – ICU: One week later**

“Morning, Jethro.” Ducky greeted as he entered the single room and saw Gibbs seated in his usual place. He was happy to note that his friend had changed his clothes and looked like he took a shower as well. He was starting to get concerned about Gibbs’ wellbeing. “You look good this morning.” 

Gibbs mumbled. “Pitt refused me entry into the room unless I took a break.” 

Ducky smiled. “Yes, that would work. I should have thought about that myself.” He ignored the foul look directed at him. Instead, he focused on the other occupant of the room. “How is Tony doing?” 

Gibbs sighed. “They’re of the opinion that he’s doing better, and I do see the progress that he’s making, but it’s still not Tony, Duck.” He couldn’t help but to shiver at the thought of what transpired in the last week. When Tony came out of surgery, they kept him longer in the recovery room as they had trouble stabilizing him. It seemed that whatever he was injected with caused a bad reaction to the anesthesia they administered. 

_“I thought you said it wouldn’t take so long, Duck. What’s going on?” Gibbs was back to pacing the floor._

_Ducky was about to answer when a familiar face approached him. “He never does anything halfway, does he Agent Gibbs?” Doctor Brad Pitt held out his hand and greeted the group of friends before him._

_“Do you know what’s going on?” Gibbs asked in a clipped tone._

_Brad nodded his head. “That’s why I’m here. Let’s take a seat and I’ll fill you all in.” Brad sighed. “It’s a miracle that Tony’s still alive. For all purposes, he should’ve been dead when you found him. The chemicals we found in his bloodstream, it was bad. I’m not going to bore you with what it contained, except to say that it’s illegal and I know that people have died from that combination of drugs. We couldn’t wait for a complete tox screen to come back before he was taken to surgery as he wouldn’t have survived without it. Unfortunately, the drug in Tony’s bloodstream and the anesthesia we used during surgery didn’t work well together. He stopped breathing again and at this time, he’s still intubated. We’ve already placed him on certain type of medication to curtail any drug addiction that might have formed as a result of this drug.” Brad looked at Gibbs. “We’ve induced a coma for the time being. It’s of utmost importance that we give Tony’s body a chance to heal.” Pitt continued and outlined all of Tony’s injuries for them. At one point, he gave a look to Gibbs that spoke of more, but left unsaid until later._

_When the team left late that night and it was only Gibbs and Ducky that remained behind, Doctor Pitt found them again._

_“How bad?” Gibbs inquired bluntly. He had already informed Ducky of what he’d noticed when they first found Tony._

_“Several nasty tears that had to cleaned and stitched. He will be quite sore for a while. He will also be on a strict diet to prevent any bowel movements at the moment. The tears will have to be treated on a daily basis until they’re healed.” Brad took a breath. “We completed the rape kit. We found traces of sperm and because of that, we’ve started him on STD medications. He’s on antiviral drugs as well and will continue to be on that for at least the next six months depending on what the rest of the tests reveal.”_

“How long are you planning on keeping him in a coma?” Gibbs hated the fact that they found it necessary to do that, but he also knew Pitt would not have done it if it weren’t necessary.

“At least for the next two days, we don’t want to keep him down under longer than necessary. We want to rid his system of all the drugs and give his body a chance to heal. After that, we’ll take it from there.”

They kept him in a coma for two days before finally starting to wake him up. From the moment Tony first opened his eyes, Gibbs knew something was wrong. They did many tests, all of his brain functions were normal, he was healing well but he was catatonic. Ducky and Pitt both tried to explain it to him, but he didn’t need their explanation to understand what was going on. In short – Tony had withdrawn so deep within himself that he didn’t respond to any outward stimuli. He could open his eyes, but there was no recognition in them. He made no sounds and didn’t move an inch on his own. All of the doctors were in agreement. Tony’s state was caused by the trauma he endured. He would most certainly suffer from PTSD as well. The bad news didn’t end there. What made Gibbs even more livid was the fact that the media found out not only about the operation, but also about Tony’s rescue, which then became headline news. They wanted to use Tony’s _death_ to their advantage but that was now impossible and they had no idea what the repercussions would be as a result. 

“Do not give up on him, Jethro. He will get better. He just needs time. From what we could gather he went through hell.” Ducky squeezed Tony’s hand and straightened his blanket. He smiled as his eye caught a book lying on the floor between Tony’s bed and the chair Gibbs so dutifully occupied. 

“Some light reading, Jethro?” 

“I can only keep a conversation going for so long Duck and I know it’s one of his favorite books.” Gibbs bent down and picked up the yellow-paged soft cover book. “I’ve never read this before, it’s good.” 

“Yes, it is. I never thought young Anthony would read it, but as always he does manage to surprise you when you are least expecting it.” He walked around the bed and took the chair on the other side of the bed. “Have you decided what you are going to do?” 

“I’m not placing him in any care facility to forget about him, Duck. You yourself said we cannot give up on him; that he needs time.” Gibbs stood up and paced the small room. 

“It never crossed my mind that you would do something like that, Jethro, but you have to be practical here. Until he is in a position to fend for himself, he will need care – around the clock care.” Ducky leaned forward and brushed a stray lock of hair from Tony’s forehead. He smiled when the green eyes snapped open and looked straight at him. His smile turned into a sigh when no sign of recognition crossed Tony’s face. “Morning, dear boy. I am sorry to have woken you up. We were just talking about you. You know, we both are very worried about you.” 

Tony continued to stare into nothingness before he made a small huffing sound and then closed his eyes again. Except for the sound and opening his eyes, he didn’t move any other part of his body. 

“When did he start making noises?” Ducky tried to keep the excitement out of his voice. 

“Last night was the first time.” Gibbs gave a small smile. “I told him it was time to sleep. At that time I’d read about two chapters to him. He huffed at me, kept staring for a while longer but then finally closed his eyes and slept.” 

“I did. They called in Brad. He seems to feel like Tony is improving.” Gibbs sighed. “I know he’s improving, Ducky. I don’t need them to tell me that, but I’m being impatient. I was a sniper once; I’m supposed to be able to be patient.” 

“But not with this”. Ducky smiled. “You want young Anthony to be awake, to be aware of what is going on around him, to tell you he is fine, although both of you will know that it is not the truth.” Ducky squeezed Tony’s hand again. 

“Hell, Duck. I know it will be a long time before everything is back to normal again, but I just need him to say my name, to call me Boss.” 

“Boss.” 

Both men leaped towards the bed. “Tony?” Gibbs asked while Ducky pressed the call button. 

“Tony?” Gibbs tried again. Tony’s eyes were open again, but he was once again staring into the big nothingness. “Can you hear me?” He turned Tony’s head so that he could look the younger man in the eyes. 

Tony didn’t even blink. 

“What’s going on, Ducky?” Gibbs frowned. 

Ducky was about to answer when a nurse came into the room with Brad on her heels. “What’s going on?” Brad asked in concern. 

“He spoke.” Ducky answered. 

“That’s good.” Brad continued to examine Tony carefully. “What did he say?” 

“He called me boss.” Gibbs replied. 

“Boss.” Tony said it again. 

“Did he say anything else?” When both men shook their heads, Brad sighed. “He’s portraying another symptom of catatonic behavior, its called echolalia. It means he’s repeating what someone else is saying, in this instance it looks like he’s repeating the word, boss.” 

“Boss.” Tone spoke up, huffed again, closed his eyes and became silent again. 

“I would say he’s already getting better.” Brad made a few notes on Tony’s file and met Gibbs’ eyes. “I’ve made a change in his medication. I don’t want to add any more, not with the cocktail he’s on all ready and with what’s been in his system these past few days. My best advice to you is to too keep on talking to him, Gibbs. If there’s one person who can bring him back, it’s you.” He placed the file back. “I’ll be back in a few hours.” He left the two men with a smile. 

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**Bethesda Hospital: Four days later**

Abby sat quietly next to Tony’s bed as she paged through one of the magazines Bishop brought along for Gibbs. It had to do with woodworking and she found a few interesting ideas that she wanted to try out for herself. The door to Tony’s room opened and she frowned when an unknown male entered the room. “Can I help you?” Abby asked as she stood up. As far as she knew, Tony wasn’t scheduled for any tests, and she could see no reason for the man to be there. 

The man looked startled to see her there and he fumbled with the clipboard he had with him. “I’m here to take Mr. Heinz for his MRI scan.” He didn’t make eye contact and focused on the papers. 

Abby frowned - something was hinky. She slowly reached for her phone even as she shook her head. “Sorry, you’ve got the wrong room; this is not Mr. Heinz’s room.” She tried to keep her phone out of sight as she fumbled for the buttons on the phone and hoped that she was pressing the correct ones. 

The man shook his head and moved deeper into the room. “It has to be right, see right here - it says room 217, Mr. Heinz.” He tried to shove the clipboard into her face and Abby had to move away not to get the thing pushed down her throat. 

“This is not room 217,” Abby sighed, maybe the guy was just lost. “This is room 277.” 

The man frowned. He looked at the papers, stepped outside, looked around and then came back. “Sorry, Ma’am. It’s indeed the wrong room number.” He turned around and left the room just as silently as when he entered it the first time. 

Abby stayed on her feet and as the man moved down the corridor, she stepped out and looked on as he disappeared into another room. She wasn’t sure, but if she remembered correctly, it might’ve been room 217 he entered. She stayed at the door and sighed when the orderly came out of the room, this time pushing the bed with a patient in it. Only when they disappeared down the hall did she finally relax and her knees gave way. She sat down and sighed. She was happy to note that Tony was still asleep. She nearly jumped out of her skin when her phone started ringing in her hand. “Gibbs”, she paced the room. “You need to get here quick, I’m not sure, but something hinky is going on here.” With elaborate hand movements, she explained what had happened. 

_“I’m in the lobby, Abs. Hold on.”_

Abby didn’t have to wait long, before she heard Gibbs pounding down the hallway. She met him at the door and closed it quietly behind her. “He’s all right; no one touched him, Gibbs.” 

“What happened?” He asked even as his hands twitched in an effort not to open the door to make sure for himself that Tony was indeed all right. 

She quickly explained and gave a detailed description of the man. She sighed when Gibbs pulled her close and kissed her on the top of the head. 

“I’ll look into it, Abby.” Gibbs held her close for a moment before he let her go. He knew he was not acting like himself, but after what happened to Tony, he realized that he needed to appreciate what he had. He reached for his phone and made a quick call before he tucked his phone away and finally stepped into the room. He could feel his shoulders sag as he found Tony’s eyes open, the normally bright green eyes that shined with life, now once again staring into nothingness. 

“Hey, Tony.” He leaned forward and brushed Tony’s hair out of his eye. “You really need a haircut.” 

“He looks sexy.” Abby piped up as she packed her bag. She had a bowling date with the Sisters and even though she had wanted to cancel, Gibbs had convinced her to go. 

Gibbs smiled at Abby’s words. “You hear that, DiNozzo, Abby thinks you look sexy.” He smiled again when Tony huffed once. Gibbs turned to face her. “Not sure if he’s agreeing with you, or disagreeing with the fact that you’re saying he only looks sexy with his hair so long.” 

“He’s agreeing with me, right, Tony?” Abby leaned in and kissed Tony on the cheek. “Be good for Bossman, okay?” She smiled as Tony huffed again. 

“Boss.” Tony uttered the single word. 

“Yeah, Tony, boss.” Abby squeezed his hand. “You going to be all right here, Gibbs? I can stay you know. The Sisters will understand.” 

“Go and enjoy yourself, Abby.” Gibbs gently pushed her out of Tony’s room before he took the chair she previously occupied. “See Bishop was here as well.” Gibbs talked as he looked at the new woodworking magazine. He paged through it and then closed it again. “I spoke to Warden McGillis today. There was a riot at Leavenworth. Daniel Liston was stabbed. He’s still alive, but they don’t know for how long. Preacher wasn’t injured but is back in solitary confinement. Had nothing to do with the riot, McGillis said the man just exploded in rage a few days back.” Gibbs sighed. “I got a feeling he found out about the mess his minions created out here. It would’ve pissed me off as well.” He swallowed hard. “We’re still looking for who did this to you, Tony. We will find them. You know I will not stop hunting them until I do.” Gibbs smirked. “Captain Ahab, remember, you called me that with Ari? But this time it’s not the same.” Gibbs reached for his phone as it started to vibrate in his pocket. “I’m right outside, Tony.” He quickly stood up and took the call in the hall. 

“What did you find out, McGee?” 

_“There is a patient by the name of Heinz, Gibbs. He was scheduled for tests today. It looks okay, Boss.”_

Gibbs looked down the hall and then sighed. “Find out about the orderly.” He repeated the description Abby gave him. “Let me know when you’ve got something.” He didn’t wait for a reply, ended the call and returned to Tony’s room. 

“When Abby says something is hinky, I tend to believe her. I know you do to, Tony. My gut is getting uncomfortable, and no, it’s not because of all the coffee I’ve been consuming while waiting for you to wake up.” Gibbs shook his head. He couldn’t believe how easy it was to talk to Tony. He used to love talking to Shannon, to sing and play with Kelly. He’d buried that part of him so deep, it was difficult to let it out again but at this stage, he would do anything in his power to get Tony to wake up. If it meant talking hours on end then so be it. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%205_zpsluzs8lrb.jpg.html)

Tobias frowned when he exited his car and saw the police cruisers at the side of the hospital building. The police tape around the corner made him walk in that direction. Even as he approached, he reached for his badge and ID. With a few words to one of the patrol officers, he was let in and walked up to the plain clothed detective. “What happened?” Tobias asked as he flashed his ID again. 

“Looks like a mugging gone wrong.” The young detective said and stood to the side as the ME and his assistant passed by to collect the body. 

“Any ID?” Fornell asked. 

“Hospital orderly”, the detective opened his pocket book. “Reynard Leeds, age forty three.” 

“Mm, how did he die?” Fornell looked on as the body was placed on the gurney to be wheeled into the waiting van. 

“From what I’ve seen, I would say a single knife wound to the abdomen. The ME will make the final call.” The detective frowned. “The FBI going to take over random acts of violence now?” 

Fornell shook his head. “Just curious.” He waited for the gurney to pass before he made his way back to the front entrance of the hospital. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%205_zpsluzs8lrb.jpg.html)

“And that frown, Tobias. Dianne giving you heartburn again?” Gibbs questioned his best friend as he sat the bottle of hand lotion down after rubbing it on Tony’s skin. The air-conditioned room was drying Tony’s skin out and Gibbs could almost hear his second in command bitch about it. It also gave him an excuse to touch Tony. Something that he liked doing – a lot. 

“Ha-ha. So funny.” He handed a large coffee that he picked up in the cafeteria to Gibbs. “There was a murder on the side of the hospital. Just made me wonder. You work here, minding your own business and wham, you’re no more.” 

Gibbs frowned, his gut churned hard. “How do you know the vic worked here?” 

“Spoke to the detective on the scene. An orderly, looked like a mugging gone wrong.” Fornell frowned as Gibbs jumped to his feet. “What’s wrong?” 

“Stay here, don’t let anyone in.” Gibbs barked out as he jogged to the elevator. On any other day it could’ve been a coincidence, but not today. He quickly made his way out of the hospital and whistled hard, attracting the attention of the detective. “I need to have a look at the body.” Gibbs said as he showed his badge and ID. 

“Not that I don’t want to cooperate, Agent Gibbs, but why?” 

Gibbs stared the detective down and stepped to the side to stop the ME’s van from pulling away. He spoke quickly to the ME and before the detective could say anything else, Gibbs had the body out of the van and started looking him over, a pair of gloves snapped on his hands not to contaminate the body. 

“What are you looking for?” The detective dared to ask. 

Gibbs didn’t reply, just looked at the deceased, closed up the bag and nodded his thanks to the ME and his assistant. Only then did he turn his attention back to the detective. “Your vic didn’t die in a mugging gone wrong, he was murdered.” 

“What? How do you know that? How can you say that?” The detective tried to keep up as Gibbs stormed off. 

“Because I can.” Gibbs pulled out his phone and made a call. “I need a security detail on Tony, Leon. They found him.” He ended the call and headed in the direction of the hospital’s security room. Until he had agents on the scene, he had to rely on hospital security to do the job. The leak through the media just bit them in the ass. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%205_zpsluzs8lrb.jpg.html)

Tobias turned his attention back to the young man who stared into nothingness. “Once again I’m in awe on how you’ve been able to work with him for so long, DiNutso. He would’ve driven me up the wall by now.” Even as he talked, he shut the door behind him and made sure his weapon was at the ready. He knew Gibbs long enough to know that his friend wouldn’t have acted in that fashion if it weren’t necessary. 

The knock on the door came as a surprise and Fornell opened the door carefully. “Yes?” 

The orderly closest to him cleared his throat. “We’re here to take Mr. DiNozzo for his next round of tests.” He had a file with him that he tried to push through the small opening of the door. 

The hair on the back of Tobias’ neck stood on end. Gibbs would’ve told him if Tony were due for tests. He reached for his side arm just as he heard Gibbs’ voice sounded from the end of the hallway. As the orderly turned, Tobias shoved the door shut in his face. He had to duck when the first shot rang out, but quickly realized that they were shooting at Gibbs and not at him. 

Fornell knew he couldn’t leave Tony on the bed; they would have a chance at him if they turned their attention to the door. However, Tony had on so many wires and IV lines, he looked like something out of a space novel and then there was the fact that his leg was in plaster from his ankle, up all the way to his thigh, but he had no choice, he had to get Tony out of the line of fire. 

“Lucky you’re in the hospital, Tony. They can patch you right up if I manage to break you.” He pulled out lines and wires, ignoring the alarms that went off. He knew none of the nurses would be running to come and have a look, not with the firefight out in the hall. “Okay, DiNutso, let’s do this.” He grabbed hold of Tony’s arms and lifted him into a sitting position. “I know that by all likelihood you don’t want to do this, but Gibbs will have my head if something happens to you, so let’s get you to safety.” He dragged Tony’s arm over his shoulder and heaved him upright. “Wow, steady, there.” He had to do a good balancing act to keep them both standing. “Okay, one foot in front of another, or just as much as you can anyway.” Tobias managed to get Tony moving and as quickly as he was able to, maneuvered them into the tiny bathroom. He was aware of the fact that he was trapping them deeper, but it gave him a wall and an extra door of protection. “Need to you stay right here, Tony.” He lowered Tony onto the toilet, happy about the fact that it was behind the door. “Don’t go anywhere, I need to go and help that hot headed marine of yours.” It was only then that he realized how quiet it had become. He could no longer hear any shots being fired; instead, everything seemed eerily quiet. Then he heard footsteps just outside of the room. Without hesitating, he raised his gun, the safety already off, ready to fire if it was not a friendly face. 

“Fornell,” Gibbs hissed as he entered Tony’s room and found it deprived with any signs of life. He knew that they couldn’t have gone far, but seeing Tony’s room empty made him go weak in the knees. “Fornell,” he hissed again and as the bathroom door creaked, he readied his weapon. 

“Gibbs?” Fornell’s voice sounded through the small opening in the door. 

“Yeah, it’s me.” 

“Safe to come out?” Fornell stayed put and didn’t lower his weapon. 

“Took care of things. It’s safe.” Gibbs knew that Tobias could see him so he lowered his weapon and flicked the safety back on. He sighed when he heard Fornell doing the same with his weapon before the door swung open. The two men stared at one another, both relaxed on seeing no blood. “Tony all right?” Gibbs asked as he moved forward. He knew he would have to speak to the police and internal affairs would become involved, but first he needed to make sure Tony was OK. 

“He’s all right.” Fornell stood to the side to let Gibbs in. “What happened?” 

“They used an orderly to get information. They had to make sure Tony was here and then they killed him. I can promise you, that whatever money he was promised, he didn’t get a cent. Just got stabbed in the gut for his trouble.” Gibbs explained. Both men looked at Tony and then gasped as Tony blinked once, twice, three times. They looked on as he lifted his head and a frown appeared on his face. 

“Tony?” Gibbs’ knees protested as he crouched before his second in command, taking Tony’s head in his hands. 

Tony kept on frowning, blinked again. “Boss?” He looked around. “Boss, I don’t feel so good.” His eyes rolled up and he slumped forward. 

“Tony”, Gibbs grabbed hold of Tony’s shoulders and with Tobias’ help, they lowered him to the floor. 

“See, I told you he’s all right.” Tobias grinned. Both men were worried, but the fact that Tony was no longer catatonic made all the difference in the world. 


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 8**

**Gibbs’ cabin: 72 Hours later**

“We’re fine here, Abby. You know I’ll take care of him.” Gibbs sighed as he paced the floor, talking to Abby while looking over to where Tony sat, silently staring out in front of him. It made Gibbs shiver and he moved closer to brush his hand over Tony’s head, sighing silently in relief as Tony looked up at him. He’d signed Tony out of hospital as his medical proxy, without Pitt, or any of the other doctors agreeing, but it was safer. Tony was on the mend and since he knew how much the younger man hated hospitals, he knew Tony would recuperate much better out of that sterile environment. “I’ll have Tony call you in a while, Abby.” He didn’t give her time to ask anything else and ended the call. 

“You holding up, Tony?” Gibbs pushed the phone into the jeans pocket and tapped the back of his shirt to make sure he’s firearm was still secure. 

Tony nodded once. He had so many questions to ask, but found it nearly impossible to find a starting. “Tell me again.” 

Gibbs looked at the man across from him. “Brad said you need to start remembering on your own and that I should only answer your questions when you’re having flashbacks.” 

Tony cocked his head. “Since when do you listen to what the doctors say, Boss?” 

Gibbs grinned. “What do you want to hear?” There were certain things he wouldn’t tell Tony, things he knew would come up later but he wasn’t going to put Tony through that kind of anguish until it was necessary. 

“Preacher gave me a number to phone, did I do that?” His hand trembled as he reached for the glass of water that Gibbs placed by his side. 

Gibbs closed his eyes for a few seconds before he responded. “You did. You first called me and then the number provided. You made contact with Preacher’s men.” Gibbs swallowed hard. “We know from DNA collected that there were two men. Guys by the names of Reginald O’Hare and Zachariah Fleming. For one or other reason we’d lost contact with you for close to two weeks. I then got a call from you which we traced back to a small town in Kansas and that’s where we found you.” Gibbs kept the facts bare. He knew Tony suspected that there was more, but until Tony pressed him for specific info, he was sticking to what he told Tony just now. 

“O’Hare and Fleming still at large.” Tony made it a statement. He wanted to ask, but couldn’t get the question past his lips. He knew the DNA was collected from him – in him. 

Gibbs grunted in response. Preacher’s men were good. All though they were still putting all of the puzzle pieces together, it seemed like O’Hare and Fleming hired a few goons to do their work for them to get rid of Tony at the hospital. Unfortunately for them, they underestimated Gibbs and the two goons paid with their lives. Gibbs shot them both. 

“And I gave you no information on them?” Tony frowned; he kept on seeing flashes of images that didn’t make any sense. 

Gibbs shook his head. “We never got a chance to debrief you.” 

“And you’ve yet to take down my statement.” 

Gibbs growled. “You know I don’t work with half pieces of info, DiNozzo. Until you remember everything, or until the DA’s office tells me otherwise, I’m not taking down any formal statement from you.” 

“It might help, Boss.” Tony sighed. He could feel a headache developing just behind his eyes. 

“No, Tony. Forget about it.” Gibbs launched to his feet and reached for the bottle of prescription medication just as Tony spoke up again. 

“Just like I’ve forgotten about everything else, Gibbs.” Tony slammed his hand on the armrest of the chair. “I might not remember what had happened, Gibbs, but I know something did, I can feel it. It drives me up the wall not knowing. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t really want to know, because if I knew then that what I suspect happened to me, it would become facts and in all honesty, Boss, I don’t think I’d be able to survive that.” He sank back into the chair. “I don’t know what to do, Gibbs.” He couldn’t believe he just blurted all that out. Things were crazy in his head. Normally his thoughts would go like a racing horse around the track, not standing still for one moment, but now, it was even worse. Some of the things he’d buried so deep within himself had been shaken loose, and the once tight lid he had on things was undone and he was struggling to shove everything back where it belonged. 

“Tony, look at me.” Gibbs crouched next to the chair. “I know you’ve got the right to know what happened to you, but I’m being selfish here and I’m going to wish that somethings you never remember. It’s bad enough that you have an idea of what had happened, I don’t want you to go through that anguish the moment you remember what happened. But we both know you too well, Tony. Your memories will return and you will remember each waking moment and that scares me shitless, because I don’t want to see you hurt, and you are going to hurt, and you’re going to want to turn away and hid behind your masks, but I’m telling you now, Tony. I’m not going to let that happen. The moment you remember I’m going to be there for you and the two of us will work through it. You’re no longer alone, Tony. You’re mine and I’m planning on taking good care of what belongs to me.” Gibbs cupped Tony’s face. “Remember that, please.” 

Tony was at a loss for words. “You’re supposed to be a functional mute, Boss.” He smiled softly and leaned into the touch, drawing strength from the kind gesture. 

Gibbs snorted. “And I’ve realized just how badly that has cost me and when you went missing I made myself a promise, one that I’m intending to keep, Tony. I’m going to talk to you.” He lifted Tony’s chin with his finger so that he could look the green-eyed man in the eyes. “You know how to talk, but you’ve perfected the art of saying nothing and that needs to stop. If we want to get through this, we are going to need to talk. I’m going to need to learn how to talk more, and you are going to learn how to talk without deflecting so much.” 

“I’m scared, Gibbs.” Tony lowered his gaze. 

“I’m scared too, Tony. But I’m not going to give up on you and I’m not going to let you give up on yourself.” He held out the pills. “Take two and get some rest, Brad will skin me alive if he sees how pale you are.” 

Tony wanted to refuse, but the look in Gibbs’ eye told him that it wasn’t a good idea. “Will they make me loopy?” 

Gibbs shook his head. “Brad made sure it’s _DiNozzo friendly_.”

Tony smiled and swallowed the medication with a bottle of water Gibbs held out to him. “Why now, Boss?” 

“Because I’m tired of pretending. Tired of fighting with myself, denying myself what has been right before me for the past fifteen years. And my gut tells me you’re tired of fighting as well, Tony.” Gibbs smiled as Tony’s eyes drooped dangerously. “That medication might not make you loopy, but it does knock you on your ass. Let’s get you more comfortable. I’ll wake you up when it’s time for dinner.” Gibbs helped Tony over to the wooden bed that he constructed and transported to the cabin just before this whole mess started. He gently helped Tony to lie down, made sure to place a few extra pillows beneath Tony’s broken leg and covered him up with a thin blanket. Gibbs stood and watched over Tony for a long time before he moved away and started making dinner. He hated the way he could feel Tony’s bones protruding through his skin, he needed to get some food into the man and fatten him up. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%204_zpsc8y7ovut.jpg.html)

**24 Hours later**

_“Boss, we’ve got problems.”_ McGee’s voice sounded through the small receiver of his phone as Gibbs walked away from the cabin, not wanting to wake Tony up, or overhear the conversation between them. 

“What problems, McGee?” Gibbs asked, as he kept on walking. 

_“The FBI picked up on a video that had gone viral over the underground-net, Boss. They’ve sent us a copy as well and we are working through it. At face value, it looks pretty much authentic. We didn’t want to tell you about it, not before we’ve worked through it, but in one way or another the media got hold of it, Boss and they’ve started asking questions. SecNav and the Director both made statements, but it’s still out there.”_

“What video, McGee?” Gibbs could feel the dread settling in his stomach as McGee continued to talk. 

_“We know it’s not real, Boss. We know that for a fact, we’d never believe this, Gibbs.” McGee sounded terrified._

“McGee!” Gibbs shouted. “What video?” He could hear the young agent taking a deep breath before he responded. The answer left him cold. 

_“Its different images all laced together, almost like a music video, Gibbs. It shows Tony with very young children, and he placed them in a sort of a grave, Gibbs. It’s clear that they are dead. From what we could see there’s about four children involved. There’s a part of him sitting in a large vehicle with high tech cameras taking pictures, with a wide shot where you could see he’s taking pictures of young children playing in a park. The last shots show him touching a small boy.” McGee’s voice had gone soft at the end. “It’s not him, Boss. It’s not Tony.”_

Gibbs remained quiet. “Send me the link.” He didn’t wait for McGee to respond and ended the call. He looked around, found a large stick lying on the ground, picked it up and started bashing it against a nearby tree, getting rid of all the buildup anger that he had inside of him. He couldn’t believe it. Tony had survived so much and now this. He knew internal affairs would not hesitate to start an inquiry, especially if outside pressure came into play. Gibbs breathed hard as he dropped the stick and rested his hands on his knees. He had to pull himself together; he couldn’t let Tony know that there was something wrong. He hated not being able to share this with the other man, but he couldn’t – not something like this. Not when Tony was unable to remember what had happened. Gibbs made the way back to the cabin, taking his time to get his emotions under control. He smiled as he neared the cabin and found Tony sitting on the small step, his back resting against the wall. 

“You all right?” Gibbs asked as he came within talking distance. 

Tony looked up and nodded his head. “Just wanted some sun, I didn’t overdo it.” 

Gibbs smirked. “Because I would’ve kicked your ass if you did. Want something to drink?” He brushed his fingers through Tony’s hair as he gently stepped over him and entered the cool cabin. 

“Beer?” Tony asked, hopefully. 

“Nope, not until you’ve completed your courses of medication. There’s coffee, water and some protein shakes that Ducky recommended.” Gibbs picked up the container. “Caramel toffee.” 

Tony sighed. “Water, please.” He managed to drag himself up and hobbled slowly back into the cabin. 

“Why aren’t you using your crutches?” Gibbs arched an eyebrow. 

“It’s just a hinder; it’s easier to get by without it.” Tony made himself comfortable in the rocking chair he occupied when they were in the living room. 

“If you fall and crack your head, I’m still head slapping you.” Gibbs grumbled, but left it at that. He knew which fights to take on, and that was not one of them. 

“What’s up?” Tony asked as he looked on where Gibbs removed a beer from the cooler and a bottle of water for him. 

Gibbs shook his head. He knew the danger in trying to talk. Tony would immediately knew that something was wrong, the fact that he already asked, told Gibbs he didn’t school his features enough and that Tony already picked up that something was going on. 

Tony cocked his head. Working with Gibbs for the past number of years had given him the ability to read Gibbs like a book. A book that at this stage told him that Gibbs knew something and didn’t want to share it with him. The fact that he didn’t want to share it, meant it had something to do with his case. He spurred him on to try again. “What did McGee have to say?” 

Gibbs had done many things in his life, lying to Tony was not been one of them. “Still working all the leads.” 

“Liston?” Tony asked and took a sip of the water. 

“Still hanging in there.” Gibbs grabbed an apple and tossed it to Tony. “It’s still a few hours to dinner time.” 

Tony grinned, took a bite of the apple and placed it on the armrest. “Making me eat, Gibbs is not going to make me keep quiet and stop asking questions. You know that, Boss.” 

“I don’t mind you asking questions; I do mind that your bones are sticking out.” He grabbed an apple for himself, getting comfortable on the only other chair that decorated the small room. 

“I thought you trusted me, Gibbs.” Tony tried to keep his voice calm. 

Gibbs bristled with anger. “You know I trust you, DiNozzo.” 

“Then why are you not telling me what’s going on. You’re keeping something from me; you know it and I can feel it.” 

“You’re not on the investigating team here, DiNozzo. What I do share or don’t share with you, is up to me.” Gibbs knew he was harsh, but he hated the way Tony always managed to get under his skin. 

“I’ve been locked up in jail for almost a year and a half, so don’t tell me that I’m not on the investigating team, Gibbs. I’ve got a right to know what you know, so don’t come and bullshit me.” Tony picked up the apple and threw it hard; it shattered against the wooden wall. 

“And what if you’ve become like them, a sick pervert. Do you still think you have the right to be on my team, DiNozzo?” Gibbs hissed as he got right into Tony’s face. 

Tony blanched and shook his head. “No, never. I would not.” 

“How do you know, DiNozzo? You cannot remember.” Gibbs stepped back as Tony went from ash grey in the face to a light shade of green. 

“No”, Tony shook his head again and tried to lift himself out of the chair, but his footing was unsure and he stumbled, falling fast. Even as he tried to stop his descent, Gibbs had him by the arm and held him steady. Tony tried to push the older man away. “Let go.” 

“No.” Gibbs made sure Tony stood steady, but didn’t release the hold he had on Tony’s arm. He knew that the first thing Tony would do was to flee, but he couldn’t allow it. “Until you’re able to remember everything, I’m not letting you on the team, and it’s got nothing to do with trust.” 

He tried to pull away again, but the grip Gibbs had on his arm stayed firm. “I would never, Boss.” He shivered at the thought and the memories that he could remember from so many years ago threatened to overpower him; to play with him, making him feel and taste what was done to him. What he was forced to do. 

“Sit back down before you fall over.” Gibbs sounded gruff as he helped Tony to sit back down again. “I know you wouldn’t, Tony, but you know how lawyers work. Until we can tell the whole story they will try and spin it their way.” 

Tony merely nodded his head. He bit down hard on the inside of his cheek. He could hear Gibbs’ voice. He knew what they were talking about, but still the memories buried inside of him threatened him. They wanted out, and they were not going to wait any longer. 

_“I never wanted children, your mother tricked me. She was supposed to be on contraceptives, but she tricked me. Told me they must’ve not worked. I didn’t want you, I still don’t want you.” Tony listened as the man he called father ranted. Most of the words he didn’t understand, but he did get the gist of it. His father didn’t love him. Since he could remember it had been like that, but then his mother died in that sterile room while they watched TV and from there on it, it became worse. He tried to stay out of the large man’s way. Kept to himself, not asking for anything, but it was difficult when he got summoned to his father study and had to stand on attention waiting for the ranting and raving to end._

_Tony looked straight ahead, not moving a muscle, just as he was taught. But there was something else going on, something that made him tremble with fear. He didn’t cry – DiNozzo’s’ didn’t cry, but the tears were right there; he knew if he blinked they would roll down his cheeks. His back went even straighter as his father came towards him, still ranting._

_“I wanted to send you away, get you out from under my feet, but I’ve changed my mind, Junior. Since it’s expected of me to have a period of mourning, I can’t go out and enjoy myself, you will have to do. It’s the least you can do since it’s my apparent duty to make sure you’ve got a roof over your head, a place to sleep and food to eat.” Tony watched on as his father reached out and grabbed him by the shirt. “Yes, Junior, it’s time you earned your keep.”_

Tony blinked. Gibbs was hunkered down before him. He could see his mouth move, knew he was talking to him, but he couldn’t hear the words. Instead, his father’s words and actions filled his mind. 

_He remembered being dragged up the stairs. He struggled to keep up and tripped over his own feet twice as his father marched him directly to his bedroom. Not the bedroom his mother slept in, but his father’s own private room. Tony was never allowed to enter the room, until now._

_Tony couldn’t understand when his father grabbed him by the arm and flung him onto the bed. He didn’t talk; he didn’t ask any questions. He had no permission to speak. He stayed as he landed on the bed and frowned when first his father shook off his fancy black dinner jacket before he undid the cufflinks and placed them on the dresser to the side of the room. He looked on as his father stripped off his shirt and stepped out of his trousers. Tony thought that his father was getting ready to take a bath and frowned. He couldn’t understand what he was doing here. Tony jumped when his father barked. “Strip.” Tony frowned. He understood the word, but had no idea on why he had to do so. He trembled with fear when his father stormed towards him, grabbed him by the arm yet again and with his two hands, he ripped the Spiderman pajama top Tony had on into two pieces. He couldn’t help but to whimper and tried to move away; it earned him a backhanded slap in the face. His head spun as he flopped backwards and didn’t fight as his father pulled down his pajama bottoms and boy shorts, leaving him naked on the bed._

“Tony?” Gibbs gently shook Tony by the shoulders. The vacant look Tony had in his eyes at the hospital was back, but he knew this time it wasn’t because Tony was catatonic. Tony was trapped within himself and Gibbs had no idea how to get him back. He wanted to slap himself on the back of the head. He knew this was his fault; he had no right to question Tony in such a way. Tony would never do anything to harm a child. “Tony,” he tried again but received no response. Gibbs got to his feet, rushed to the small bathroom, took a washcloth and ran it under the cold water, before rinsing it out and going back to Tony’s side. “Come on, Tony. Snap out of it. Come back to me, you’re safe here.” He ran the cold cloth over Tony’s face, hoping that the coldness would snap Tony out of whatever memory he was having. 

_His father’s touch was unfamiliar. It felt rough and hard and he didn’t like where his father touched him. He tried to squirm, but after the second and rapidly followed up third back hand, Tony settled down. He squeezed his eyes shut, as the touches became more intrusive, and he couldn’t help when something entered him down there and he screamed. “You sound just like your mother. She didn’t like it either, but like her, you’ll learn to love it, beg for it.” Tony screamed again as the burning sensation blossomed into streaking white pain. This time he didn’t stop, but tried to get away, tried to fight, but his small eight year old body wasn’t a match for his father’s and he was quickly overpowered and shoved hard into the mattress as his father took what he wanted, used because he felt he could._

Gibbs’ reflexes were good, but not that good and Tony’s right fist caught him straight on the nose. “Shit”, he grabbed hold of his nose and as his eyes watered, he knew the gush of fluid from his nose wasn’t anything but blood. Gibbs ignored it and tried to get Tony to calm down. Once again, the younger man was trying to get up, but unfortunately for him, but luckily for Gibbs, Tony’s broken leg and various other injuries made it difficult for Tony to move fast. 

“DiNozzo!” Gibbs snapped and sighed when Tony finally jerked and his movements stilled. “You with me?” 

Tony’s hands trembled as he dragged his hand over his face. “Boss?” He asked shaky, and his eyes grew large when he saw the blood leaking from Gibbs’ face. His breathing hitched and he felt nauseous. “Going to be sick”, he managed to push Gibbs to the side before he lost the battle with his rebelling stomach and heaved hard. 

Gibbs lost his footing when Tony shoved him to the side and landed hard on his back. He wanted to growl again when he heard the retching sounds Tony made. He stayed where he was, not wanting to crowd Tony while he was ill. When Tony lifted his head, exhaustion clear on his face, Gibbs moved back to his side. “You okay?” 

Tony nodded his head. “Sorry, Gibbs.” He sighed and leaned back into the chair. It felt like he’d just finished running a marathon, his muscles ached and he felt totally drained. 

“Nothing to be sorry about, Tony.” Gibbs grimaced at the mess, he’d have to clean that but first he had to take care of Tony. “I think it’s time you lay down, you’re as white as a sheet.” He didn’t wait for Tony to argue, but pulled him to his feet and placed him back onto the large bed. “Let me get you some water.” 

Tony balled his fists in an attempt to stop himself from trembling so hard, but nothing helped. His teeth clattered and he sighed when Gibbs returned and pulled the comforter over him. “Thank you.” He took a few sips of the cool liquid, swished it around in his mouth and spit it out into the bin Gibbs brought with him. After that, he took a large gulp of water and then closed his eyes. He could feel Gibbs looking at him, but he hoped that Gibbs would let him be; only if it was temporary. Tony knew Gibbs would want to talk about what had happened. He wasn’t sure if he’d be able to explain. 

“Get some rest. I’ll leave the bin next to you.” Gibbs couldn’t help but to pull his fingers through Tony’s hair. He smiled when Tony sighed softly and leaned into the touch. He stayed next to Tony’s side until Tony finally started to relax. He quickly cleaned up the mess. The tissue paper he grabbed and shoved into his nose made breathing difficult, but when the floor was finally clean, he took care of his nose as well. “At least it’s not broken.” Gibbs spoke to himself as he inspected his nose in the bathroom mirror. There was some minor bruising, but that was it. Gibbs washed the blood from his face and changed his ruined t-shirt for a clean one. He checked on Tony and found his second in command to be dozing peacefully. Only then, he picked up his phone and exited the cabin. He had a few calls to make, but first he had to look at the link he knew McGee would’ve sent his way. It made him sick to the stomach just to think about that, but he had to know. He had to know what they were up against. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%204_zpsc8y7ovut.jpg.html)

Tony woke up with the smell of cowboy style steak and placed his hand over his stomach when it rumbled hard. 

“Should’ve known you would be hungry for steak.” Gibbs’ voice sounded to the side of the cabin where the fireplace was. 

“Think it would growl for pizza as well.” Tony replied as he slowly managed to right himself on the bed. 

“You feeling better?” Gibbs asked as he passed a glass of juice to Tony and lifted his beer to his lips. 

“Would even been better if I can have one of those, Boss.” Tony grinned but gulped the juice down, only realizing how thirsty he was when he emptied the glass in one shot. 

“Not on my watch, DiNozzo.” Gibbs took the glass from Tony’s grasp and without a word helped Tony back to the rocking chair. “Dinner will be done in about five minutes.” 

“Thanks.” Tony looked at Gibbs’ nose and grimaced. “Did you take something for that?” 

Gibbs gently touched his nose. “Took some Tylenol. Feels better all ready.” 

Tony lowered his head, but looked up when Gibbs spoke his name. 

“Tony, you didn’t mean it. Don’t go and wallow in guilt about it.” Gibbs took the steak from the fire and placed the two pieces of meat on the plates, before he scraped the foil covered potatoes from the fire and placed them on the plates as well. He shook his head when Tony wanted to speak up. “We’re going to eat first.” He didn’t give Tony time to respond, but handed him the first plate, made sure that the butter was within reach and reached for his own plate. The two men enjoyed dinner in comfortable silence. 

“Let me clean this away and then we’re going to talk.” Gibbs placed his hand at the back of Tony’s neck and squeezed it gently. “It’s going to be all right, Tony.” 

Tony looked on as Gibbs cleaned up around them and as Gibbs placed the kettle on the fire to make some coffee, Tony got up gently from the rocking chair and gingerly made his way out of the door and took his seat in the doorway to look outside. 

“It’s a nice evening.” Gibbs climbed over Tony’s legs and made himself comfortable on a log. He reached for his weapon that he had tucked into his shirt and placed it on the ground next to his foot. 

“You planning on shooting me, Boss?” Tony smiled at the joke. 

Gibbs snorted. “Not getting rid of you so easily, Tony. Waited for far too long for you to get rid of you now.” 

Tony didn’t respond but looked out at the night, the light breeze in from the lake making the air cool and he sighed deep. “I didn’t mean to hit you, Gibbs.” 

Gibbs remained silent. He knew that if he interrupted now, Tony would not talk. 

“When my father sent me off to boarding school; to Rhode Island, I reinvented myself. No one knew who I was, where I came from, what happened to me or what I was capable of. I liked it. I used every chance I got to be someone else. I excelled in it. It became second nature for me to hide behind a mask. Soon I realized that I could be anyone, or anything I wanted to be. I didn’t need to be _him_.” The distain for his younger self was clearing audible in his voice. 

“ _He’s_ still part of you, Tony.” Gibbs had to speak up; he instinctively knew Tony was talking about his younger self. 

Tony shook his head and sighed. “If we had this conversation before I went undercover, Boss, I would’ve told you no. But after this fuckup, after tonight”. Tony lowered his head. “It’s true what they say: you can never outrun your past. It catches up to you eventually.” 

“It should’ve never been expected of you to forget about the younger you, Tony.” Gibbs kept his voice soft, but needed to make sure Tony knew he wasn’t judging him. That he was there for him. 

Tony stayed quiet. He looked up and watched the stars, remembering the constellations Gibbs showed him, remembering that he could trust Gibbs; that he did trust Gibbs. “He didn’t send me to boarding school as part of disowning me. He sent me away because I became too old.” Tony snorted. “Not for him per se, but for his _friends_.” He cleared his throat. “I can’t talk about that, not now.” He looked up and Gibbs noted the vulnerability in Tony’s eyes. 

“Okay.” Gibbs respected Tony’s wishes. Both men knew that for Tony to finally get over what had happened to him, he would need to talk, but Tony was right; now was not the time. 

“I first saw my father again when I was in college.” Tony shook his head. “He acted as if nothing happened. I was stupid enough to confront him about it. You know what he said to me, Gibbs? He said that it was a mistake. That it shouldn’t have happened. That’s it. I punched him so hard, I managed to break three of the small bones in my hand but I couldn’t care less. It felt so good. We never spoke about it again.” Tony snorted and held up his hand. “No, that’s not correct. I did try once more, but that time he just looked at me and told me I always had an over active imagination. I must’ve gotten that from my mother.” He looked at his hands and frowned when he noticed they were trembling again. 

Gibbs got up from his log and kneeled in front of Tony, not giving a damn that his knees protested the action. He reached out and covered Tony’s hands with his own. “You never deserved that, Tony.” He didn’t add that DiNozzo Senior would never come near Tony again. Tony didn’t need to know about that. From now on, he would take care of Tony. 

Tony looked up and nodded his head. “For a long time I thought it was something I did wrong. Maybe I wasn’t a good enough son. Maybe I was not clever enough, so I made sure I studied harder. Maybe I walked too loudly, so I learned how to be as quiet as a mouse, or maybe I ate too much. I went without food for days, but nothing worked, Gibbs. He just kept on doing it, kept on making me available to them. It took me years to realize that I was not at fault, but by that time I’d managed to bury all of what had happened so deep that sometimes even I wondered if it wasn’t just my imagination.” 

Gibbs shook his head. “No one imagines something like that, Tony. No one.” He squeezed Tony’s hand. “I’m not blaming you for anything, but if I knew about this before, Tony I wouldn’t have let you go on that mission.” 

Tony shook his head. “I would’ve done it in any case, Gibbs. There was no choice about it.” 

In his heart Gibbs knew Tony was right. It wouldn’t have changed a thing, but he still would’ve done everything in his power to protect Tony from this. The bad thing – it was still not over. There was still someone after Tony, and the video just complicated everything more. Gibbs looked up at Tony’s face. Thin pain lines decorated Tony’s face. “Let’s get you inside. It’s been a long day.” The fact that Tony let Gibbs help him up without complaining, made him realize just how badly all of this had effected Tony. 

Both men got ready for bed in silence and as Tony moved closer to his side, Gibbs didn’t hesitate one moment to gather him in his embrace. “Love you, Tony.” Gibbs whispered the words softly and smiled as Tony hummed against his chest. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%204_zpsc8y7ovut.jpg.html)

When Tony woke up he wasn’t surprised to find Gibbs’ side of the bed empty. The older man never stayed in bed after waking up from his sleep. He turned and smiled when he saw Gibbs in the rocking chair, nursing a mug of coffee while paging through what looked like to be a snipers magazine. 

“You want some coffee?” Gibbs asked without looking up from the magazine. 

“How do you do that?” Tony asked as he pushed himself up from the bed. 

“Your breathing changed.” Gibbs explained as he got up, poured Tony a mug of coffee, added the hazelnut creamer and sugar and then handed it over to him. 

“Thanks, Boss.” 

“Think it’s time you stopped calling me Boss, Tony.” Gibbs took a seat next to Tony on the bed. 

Tony smirked. “Want me to call you, Leroy?” 

“Only if you want your balls shoved down your throat.” Gibbs grumbled, but humor danced in his eyes. 

“No, don’t want that. Pretty much attached to my balls.” Tony placed a protective hand over his private parts. 

“You want to call me Jethro?” 

“Will my balls be safe?” 

Gibbs laughed. “Yes, they will be.” 

“Jethro. You know I never called you Jethro before. I’ve referred to you as Leroy Jethro Gibbs to people, but I’ve never called you Jethro. It’s a strong name.” 

“It means excellence or abundance in Hebrew.” 

“You Jewish?” 

Gibbs shook his head. “I was named after my father’s best friend of many years back. Not sure if he’s Jewish.” 

“You know I’m most likely to shorten it to Jet.” Tony sipped at his coffee. 

Gibbs shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t mind.” 

It made Tony grin, but then he sobered up. “What about work?” 

Gibbs placed his mug on the ground and turned to face the other man. “Let’s get through this mess first before we started thinking about work. But let me say this to you. I will not choose between you and my work. You will come first.” He cupped Tony’s face. “You got that?” 

Tony nodded. “I got that, Jet.” 

Gibbs smiled. “Good”. He helped Tony wash up, made sure Tony ate some breakfast and took his medication before he spoke again. “I need to do some work, and I don’t want you to be involved in it. I’ll make the calls outside.” 

Tony swallowed hard at the idea that he wouldn’t be able to work on this with the team, but after the previous night, he understood why. “You’ll tell me if I can help with something.” 

“I will.” Gibbs leaned in and kissed Tony squarely on the mouth, making both men grin when they broke apart. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%204_zpsc8y7ovut.jpg.html)

Tony looked through the cabin window where Gibbs had been pacing outside for the past half an hour. The other man had been outside now for almost two hours. At first, he could hear from Gibbs’ tone of voice that everything was in order, but the longer he stayed outside the crankier he became. When he finally ended the last call, he started pacing. Although Tony couldn’t hear to whom he spoke, he had a feeling that last call was with McGee and whatever the young agent told their boss didn’t go down well. 

Tony hobbled over to the door with a beer in his hand. “You’re going to walk a smaller version of the Grand Canyon into the ground if you keep on pacing like that, Boss.” Tony held up the beer. “Think you need this to cool down some.” 

Gibbs looked up from where he was pacing when he heard Tony’s voice. He couldn’t help but smile when Tony called him boss again. “I thought you were going to call me by my name?” He closed the distance between them and took the beer from Tony’s grasp, their fingers brushing against each other. 

“You’re still in work mode, thought it better to call you Boss.” Tony shrugged. “I know you said you don’t want me involved, but something is clearly bothering you. Maybe I can help?” 

Gibbs caught Tony’s face in his hands and with his thumb stroked Tony’s cheekbone. “You know how I feel about apologies, but I’ve come to realize that I’ve gone the wrong way about this. You need to be involved. Trust me; I don’t want you to be. I don’t want to see you hurt even more, but without you we’re hitting a wall and not getting anywhere.” Gibbs sighed. “I spoke to Ducky and to Brad, both are still of the opinion that I shouldn’t tell you what happened, but my gut is saying something different.” He pulled Tony closer and hugged him for a few seconds before letting go. “Let’s sit outside.” Gibbs helped Tony outside and pulled the log he used as a chair closer to Tony’s chair. “There’s some stuff we didn’t tell you, I think it’s time that you become aware of this and of everything else again. But before I start, Tony, I need you to make me a promise. You need to tell me when it becomes too much. You’re still healing and I won’t jeopardize your health.” 

Tony swallowed hard. Something in Gibbs’ voice made him realize that things were more complicated than what he initially expected. He also had a feeling that he wasn’t going to like what he heard. He could feel his chest tightening up and had to take a few deep breaths to calm himself down. “I promise.” 

Gibbs squeezed Tony’s hand once, before settling down. Their hands stayed interlinked. “Okay, here goes.” Gibbs had to take a steadying breath himself before he could continue. “One of the first things you need to know is that Carmichael is out.” 

Tony blanched at the words and shook his head. “No, no, it’s not possible. How is that possible, did he escape, when did it happen, do Ben’s parents know, what do they say about it?” He had so many questions and couldn’t understand how it was possible for that monster to be out of prison. 

Gibbs lowered his gaze. “He was let out on parole.” 

“NO!” This time Tony launched to his feet, the shooting pain in his leg not hindering from getting to his feet. “How the fuck did that happen!” He tried to walk away, but stopped when Gibbs pulled him back. 

“You need to calm down, Tony.” Gibbs didn’t like the gray color of Tony’s skin. Already a thin sheen of sweat covered his face and arms. He didn’t give Tony time to respond, but pulled Tony onto his lap, grateful that the log they sat on was stable enough not to go wobbly beneath them. “Just calm down and I’ll tell you what happened.” 

Tony quivered with anger. He hated being pinned down, it always made him feel as if he couldn’t breathe, but inside Gibbs’ embrace he felt himself calming down. The tight feeling in his chest loosened up and he found himself leaning back against Gibbs’ chest drawing strength from the man seated behind him. 

Gibbs sighed as he felt Tony marginally relax against him. He’d started running his hand up and down Tony’s arm and continued as he told Tony everything from the day Tony was released. There were still many blanks left to fill in, something that only Tony could do when his memories returned, but what Gibbs knew he shared with Tony. It was pure hell on both of the men. Gibbs stumbled over his words when he told Tony how they found him – what they found. He’d tightened his hold as Tony tried to get away, making sure that Tony knew he was safe. He ended up telling Tony about Price, about the chat rooms and how close they came to tracking down Carmichael. He explained in more detail about the men who were after Tony and how it looked like they disappeared into thin air. Gibbs ended the conversation by telling Tony about the link and then he fell silent. They sat in silence for a long time, Gibbs maintained his hold on the man he loved in his arms, while Tony tried to absorb and make sense of what he learned. Every time Tony made a sound of distress, Gibbs held him tighter, told him that he was safe until finally Tony slumped back against Gibbs’ chest, totally exhausted. 

“Let’s get inside.” Gibbs noticed for the first time how late it was getting. The shadows were long; the sun had nearly gone down. They’d spent a very long time outside and although he wasn’t hungry and he had a feeling Tony wasn’t hungry either, he knew they had to get something to eat. 

Tony merely nodded his head, but made no movement to get up from Gibbs’ lap. He didn’t want to move, he didn’t want to think about what was going to happen next but he also knew he couldn’t just ignore it. It wouldn’t go away. He lifted his head, found Gibbs’ gaze with his. “I need to see the video.” 

Gibbs wanted to object, but knew Tony had to see it. He grunted in agreement as he helped Tony to his feet. “Tomorrow morning, I will show it to you.” 

Tony knew by the edge in Gibbs’ voice that the other man would not change his mind. “Tomorrow morning”, he agreed as they made their way back into the cabin and closed the door on night behind them. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%204_zpsc8y7ovut.jpg.html)

“Breathe, Tony, breathe.” Gibbs sounded scared as he pushed Tony’s head between his knees, urging him to take a deep breath to stop him from passing out. Tony had been hyperventilating for the past few minutes, and already Gibbs could see a blue tint forming on his upper lip making it clear that Tony was not getting enough oxygen. 

“Come on, DiNozzo, don’t do this to yourself. Everything will be fine, breathe with me.” Gibbs placed his hand on Tony’s chest and Tony’s hand on his. “Breathe with me, Tony, just like this.” He lifted Tony’s head so that Tony looked at him and took a deep breath. “Come on, Tony. You too, just like this.” He continued to take deep breaths until finally Tony followed his example and took a deep breath of his own. “Good, so good. Again, Tony, again.” Gibbs kept on coaching Tony through the simple breathing exercise until Tony’s breathing finally evened out and the blueness disappeared from his upper lip. 

“Gibbs?” Tony’s voice was soft, still laced with something that sounded like fear. 

Gibbs took Tony’s head in his hands and made sure Tony looked him in the eyes. “It’s going to be all right, I promise you. It’s going to be all right.” 

Tony closed his eyes for a few seconds and when he opened them again, Gibbs could see the anguish Tony felt in them clearly. “I remember, Gibbs. I remember taking out their little bodies and burying them in an unmarked grave. I remember.” 

Gibbs swallowed hard as Tony leaned forward and started to weep. He wanted to do nothing more than to go and kill those sons of bitches that did this to Tony – that killed those children. Gibbs made a vow – they would find them and they would pay for what they’d done. He held Tony close as Tony continued to cry against his shoulder, ridding himself of all of those emotions he had to bottle up inside of him since he started the assignment. Gibbs knew Tony would feel guilty for what had happened, but they would deal with it. For Tony to cry as he was – it was a good thing, it meant that Tony would be all right. It would take time, but in the end, Tony would be just fine. 


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 9**

**Two days later**

“You got everything, Tony?” Gibbs asked as he locked the cabin door behind him and walked over to where Tony was leaning against the truck. 

“Everything is here, Jethro.” Tony smirked. He loved calling Gibbs by his name. He’d seen the glint in the other man’s eyes when he called him that. 

“Good, then let’s get going.” Gibbs helped Tony get into the front of the truck before he got in behind the wheel. “You’re ready for this?” 

Tony shook his head. “No, but I have to be.” Tony answered with honesty. They’d taken the last two days before they packed to talk, to get to know one another even on a deeper level than before and they both agreed on one aspect – they needed to be honest. 

“You’re not alone.” Gibbs reached out and touched Tony’s hand. He’d soon realized that Tony was touch deprived and it finally made sense why Tony would sometimes go out of his way to do things that made Gibbs headslap him. Gibbs loved touching Tony and although he knew it would be difficult for him to keep his hands of his second in command once they were back at work, he would make sure that Tony knew he was there for him and touch him whenever possible. 

“McGee say anything else, Boss?” Tony asked as they headed back to Washington. 

“The DNA found on Angelina Bernard, matched both O’Hare and Fleming.” Gibbs sighed. “Now they had even more proof that the group they were pursuing was part of the large syndicate that targeted children, more specifically Navy children of all ages. He looked at the man next to him. “Between McGee and Abby they finally managed to take that link apart. Internal Affairs and the DA both backed off in pursuing any possible charges against you.” Gibbs shared the latest info with the man next to him. 

“I didn’t do anything.” Tony’s voice was soft. 

“You didn’t do anything.” Gibbs repeated the words, knowing that Tony needed to hear it from him. 

“Now we need to find Zach, Reggie and Carmichael.” Tony moved around in his seat. He got quickly agitated if he thought about them. 

“Well find them.” Gibbs replied. 

“We need to do it my way, Gibbs.” Tony tied to pitch his plan again. 

“Not going to happen, Tony. Never.” Ice crept into Gibbs’ voice. 

“It’s the only way and you know it.” 

Gibbs shook his head. “It’s not the only way, we’ll find them. I’m not letting you do this to yourself.” He still shuddered as he realized why Tony was so good in fitting into those chat rooms. Being a victim, made it possible for Tony to talk to those sick perverts in a way they understood and now Tony want to go and do it again to find them. Gibbs would not let that happen. 

“We won’t catch them in any other way.” 

“Damn it, DiNozzo, NO!” Gibbs slammed his hand hard against the steering wheel. “I’ve told you no and the answer stays no. You can either accept that, or you’re off this investigation, is that understood?” 

“Crystal clear, Boss.” Tony turned his body away and closed his eyes as he rested his head against the window. 

Gibbs sighed, he wanted nothing more than to reach over and grab hold of Tony, to explain to him that he wasn’t angry, but rather scared shitless, but he also knew Tony and knew that now was not the time to do so. Tony first had to work out things for himself and then they would talk. The rest of the trip back to Gibbs’ house was traveled in silence. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%202_zpsbakn532b.jpg.html)

Tim reached the waste bin just in time as his stomach emptied violently and his dinner reappeared only a few hours after he’d eaten. “Shit”, he swallowed hard and pushed the bin to the side but stayed hunkered on the floor. In the background, he could still hear the sounds that provided the soundtrack to the images that made him so violently ill. For a moment, he was thankful that Abby wasn’t with him to see this, but then he swallowed hard. He needed to show this to Gibbs. From what he’d seen, he had no doubt that Tony had no idea that what was done to him was recorded. McGee steeled himself as he got to his feet. The message displayed at the bottom of his screen was quite clear. For a few dollars extra, he could buy the whole video. The message indicated that the video was about two hours long. It struck him hard. Tony had been tortured; violated for two hours and those sick bastards recorded every moment of it and then decided they wanted to make more money and now they were selling copies of this sick encounter to those who were into this kind of thing. McGee knew he had to trace the source. They needed a way to find out how many copies had been sold and they had to find each and every copy and destroy them. Tim knew that this would break Tony, and he had no idea if they’d be able to fix him again. 

Tim reached for his phone. He might need Abby’s help in locating these bastards, but he didn’t want to involve her in this. He also knew he had to call Gibbs. This was something he couldn’t keep from Gibbs. He just wished he wasn’t the person that had to deliver the news to him. In the end, he took a deep breath and dialed Gibbs’ number. The sooner he informed the man about this, the sooner they could get to the bottom of this and make sure those bastards paid for what they’d done. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%202_zpsbakn532b.jpg.html)

Gibbs frowned as he looked at the time and then back at his ringing phone. It was well past midnight and although he was used to being called at all hours of the day, something about this call felt different. He looked at Tony sprawled out fast asleep next to him as he answered the phone. “McGee?” 

_“I know it’s late, Boss, but there’s something I need to show you. Can I come over?”_

Gibbs dragged his hand over his face. His gut churned hard. “It’s still not done, is it?” He sighed. “Door will be open, McGee.” He ended the call and looked back at the man he loved. Tony was still dead to the world. Tony normally slept poorly, but Gibbs had managed to get him to take some of the stronger pain medication prescribed as his whole body ached from their long road trip back home. Maybe it was a good thing. He kissed Tony on the top of the head, pulled on a pair of sweats and headed down the stairs. His Sig was next to him on the kitchen counter as he made himself some coffee before he settled at the table and waited for his junior agent to show up. 

The soft knock at the door was followed by McGee entering the house. He saw Gibbs at the table and came to a halt. 

“It can’t be that bad, McGee. What do you have?” Gibbs indicated to the laptop McGee clutched to his chest. 

“Where’s Tony, Boss?” McGee asked as he placed the laptop on the table and opened it up. 

“Sleeping.” Gibbs didn’t elaborate.

Tim nodded his head. “I was looking for any trace of either of those trolls on some of the chat rooms we’ve been monitoring, Boss when this caught my eye.” McGee indicated to the link. 

Gibbs frowned. “What does it say, McGee, I can’t read it.” 

“It’s entitled _‘Navy Agent likes it rough’_. It was just something about the title that made me open it, Boss.” McGee explained. The curser hovered over the link. 

“I’m not going to like it, am I?” Gibbs looked at McGee’s pale complexion. “Leave it here, McGee. I don’t think you need or want to see it again.” 

“I don’t think anyone wants to see that, Gibbs. But I’ll stay. I don’t want to see it again, on that you’re right. But we’ll need to discuss what’s at the end.” Tim looked over to the couch. “I’ll just sit over there until you’re done, Boss.” 

Gibbs grunted out his agreement and clicked on the link. He didn’t have to wait long before the screen first filled with images and then with sound. At first, he noticed two men circling around a cross and when they moved, he could make out Tony’s form shackled to the cross. That image alone was enough to make him see red and wanted him to commit murder. He balled his fists as he continued to look at the screen. The sounds of flesh slapping against flesh and pained filled screams filled the room as the two men tortured Tony continuously. Gibbs wanted to do nothing more than heave the laptop over his shoulder and slam it to pieces against the wall, but he kept his temper intact as the video played out. The message at the bottom of the video caught his eye. He closed the link and lowered his head. He remained like that for a long time before he finally opened his eyes. “Can we find them through this link to buy an extended copy?” Gibbs’ voice was rough. 

McGee had moved from the couch to the table and nodded his head. “I just need your authorization and then we can do it. I’ll contact the legal department as soon as it’s light and set everything in motion on their side as well.” 

“Let me know when you’ve traced them. I’ll be going with you.” Gibbs looked up at the ceiling where Tony was still asleep. “Can we find out how many copies were sold, is there a way to find them all?” 

McGee sighed. “We can hope they kept good record of all the transactions. It will give us the means to trace all of the sold copies.” 

Gibbs nodded his head. 

“Boss?” McGee looked nervous. “Are you going to tell Tony?” 

Everything inside of Gibbs wanted to say no. Wanted to swear McGee to silence, but he knew he couldn’t. Tony had a right to know about this. After Tony remembered the burials and the rest of the stuff, they had a long conversation about how Gibbs and Tobias found Tony. He’d explained to Tony what they found there, what they thought went down there, but he’d never expected anything like this. It was clear that Tony didn’t remember it. It scared him. Tony was dealing with enough other terrors but to be faced with this as well – he wasn’t sure how Tony would take it. 

“Boss?” McGee asked again as Gibbs remained silent. 

Gibbs cleared his throat and lifted his eyes to meet Tim’s gaze. “I’ll tell him, McGee.” He sounded tired. “Go home, get some sleep. I’ll see you at the office around 08:00.” He closed the laptop and handed it back to the junior agent. Without a word, he guided Tim to the door and as Tim stepped onto the porch, Gibbs closed and locked the door. He switched off the lights, and made his way back to the bedroom. He stood in the door and looked on as Tony slept. Gibbs smiled as he saw that Tony had gotten hold of his pillow and snuggled with it. After a quick turn in the bathroom, Gibbs rid himself of the sweats he had on and climbed back into bed. He smiled as Tony immediately released the hold he had on the pillow and had no problem in crawling into Gibbs’ arms without waking up. Gibbs watched as Tony slept on. He wouldn’t be able to sleep again, not this night, not with those images flickering behind his eyes. He hugged Tony closer and settled in to keep guard until the sun came up and it was time to face a new day. 

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Tony closed the lid of the laptop and pushed away from the table. He was white as a sheet; little droplets of sweat decorated his top lip. 

“Tony?” Gibbs asked concerned and reached to touch Tony’s arm. The reaction was instant, as Tony swung wide. This time Gibbs was prepared and he managed to block the shot with ease. Not hesitating, Gibbs moved forward and trapped Tony in his arms. He knew the reason why Tony lashed out, he wanted Gibbs to go away, he wanted to deal with this on his own and Gibbs was not going to let that happen. Gibbs grunted as a well-placed elbow connected to his midriff. He would most definitely have a bruise there the following day. “Calm down, I’ve got you.” He grunted again as Tony got another hit in before he managed to step clear of the table and took Tony down to the floor. He knew it might not be the best thing to do to Tony right now, but he had to keep Tony there. He changed his grip and managed to pin Tony down, but he still made sure that most of his weight was to the side and not pressing down on Tony as well. “I’m right here, Tony, everything will be all right. I’m right here.” 

The sounds that emanated from Tony sounded inhuman. He shivered hard; the keening sounds were filled with undiluted terror as he tried to get away. He could see the images on the screen as it kept on flashing through his head and they got mixed up with memories of the past. He could clearly hear his father’s voice in is ear. He could feel the pain as his father thrust into him; his own screams audible even above the grunting sounds that stemmed from his father as he pushed himself deeper into Tony’s tiny body. 

“Come on, Tony, come back to me. It’s all right. You’re safe; everything is going to be all right.” Gibbs kept on repeating the litany of words into Tony’s ear as he held on tight, making sure Tony couldn’t get away, but also at the same time making sure Tony didn’t get the chance to hurt himself. “Just listen to my voice; I’m right here with you, Tony. Right next to you. Come back to me, Tony. Come back, you’re safe.” 

It took longer than Gibbs wished, but finally Tony relaxed against him and he loosened his hold. “Let’s get off this floor and I’ll get you some water.” Gibbs pulled Tony up and made him sit on the couch before he quickly brought him a bottle of water. He was surprised when Tony spoke. 

“How can you stand being close to me, Gibbs? I’m filth.” He shuddered hard. 

Gibbs lifted Tony’s chin to catch his eye. “When you were young did you ask your father to abuse you, to sexually assault you, to rape you? Did you ask these so-called men to tie you up, to assault you, to degrade you like a piece of meat and to rape you? Let me answer those questions for you, Tony, because I have a feeling you don’t believe the answers you hear even when you say it aloud. The simple answer to all of those questions is no. No, you didn’t ask for it, you didn’t deserve it and you definitely didn’t want it. Your father was supposed to love you, to care for you and to protect you. What he did was unspeakable, and I for one, don’t understand why he’s still walking on this earth. As for those other two - they are the filth, they are the scum. They took without asking, they drugged you and they left you for dead. They and your farther are the ones who don’t deserve someone close to them, who don’t deserve someone to love them, to care for them.” 

“What about the copies? Do we know how many were sold? FUCK! People are going to see me and think I’m a creep, just look what I did. I was hard Gibbs, my cock stood proud. You saw it for yourself, I’m a fucking freak!” 

“Anthony DiNozzo”, Gibbs shook Tony hard. “Your body was pumped full of so many different drugs that you couldn’t control your reaction to anything. Brad, Ducky and all the other doctors said your survival was miraculous. You heard the sounds you made; your body might’ve been hard, but your screams were not screams of passion, they were of pure agony. I will not let you think of yourself as being dirty or filthy. You are not.” Gibbs took a calming breath. “And as for the video, any person who has a copy of something like that in their possession is sick. You only have to watch the clips to know that not only is it distasteful, but that there is no consent. The people who have copies are those we will hunt down. They are the ones trolling for young innocent lives, who want to see people hurt, who get off on people being hurt. McGee and I already have a plan in place. He will find each and every copy sold and we will get those copies back, but we’ll take it even further, we’ll run each one of those sick bastards’ names through the system, and we will pick them up and they will be prosecuted. I will not let it go, Tony. And you will not let it go either. We will destroy all of those videos. We will find O’Hare and Fleming. We will bring Carmichael, Preacher down and if Liston stays alive, we’ll make sure he pays as well.” 

Gibbs pressed their foreheads together. “You will not be beaten by this. You are stronger than they are and I will not allow it, Tony. I will not.” 

Tony remained quiet for a long time. He still could see those images of himself on the screen. He couldn’t remember, and that scared him. He heard what Gibbs said, but it was still difficult to comprehend, to accept. Gibbs was right about one thing - he couldn’t just let it go. He didn’t want those copies out there and Reggie, together with Zach had to be brought to justice. He wasn’t going to lie down and take it. 

“What time are you going to the office?” He sniffed hard and dragged his hand through his hair. 

“Meeting McGee at 08:00.” 

“Good, I’m coming with you.” 

Gibbs didn’t respond but smiled. He knew Tony would not take it lying down. It still looked like a strong breeze could blow him over, but at least he knew that Tony was willing to fight, that was more than enough reason for him to let Tony go with him. “Grab your crutches, I’ll get my coffee.” Gibbs pulled Tony to his feet. 

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McGee stood up as the elevator dinged open at exactly 08:00 and Gibbs exited it with Tony on his heels. He looked on as Gibbs walked slowly, making sure that Tony kept up. Those agents that were around looked up, but quickly looked back down again when Gibbs met their stares. Gibbs helped Tony settle behind his desk, squeezed his hand and then turned to face McGee. 

“What do you have, McGee?” 

Tim first looked at Tony over Gibbs’ shoulder. “Boss?” 

“Rough morning, McGee. He’ll be all right.” Gibbs indicated to the screen again. “Find something out?” He concentrated on what Tim revealed, trying to forget how Tony reacted after seeing the video and how they realized that it wouldn’t be a good idea for Tony to remain home alone. Tony had promised Gibbs that he wouldn’t try to run away, but Gibbs still didn’t want Tony to be alone. Not while all of those images were so fresh in his mind. 

McGee used the remote to click on the large screen. “I’ve managed to place an order and through the link I’ve traced the IP address to this address. I’m waiting for the legal department to come through for us with a warrant.” 

“What’s at the address?” Gibbs asked as he moved closer to Tony’s side. 

“It’s in Alexandria. Single story home. Three bedrooms, one and a half bath, open plan kitchen, living room area. It’s supposed to be unoccupied as it will be going to auction in a few weeks.” Tim brought the blue prints of the dwelling up on the screen. “I’ve contacted the local police and they will keep an eye out until we can get there.” 

“Good work, Tim.” Gibbs turned and hunkered down next to Tony’s chair. “You want to look at me, please?” He waited patiently for Tony to acquiesce to his request before he continued to talk. “You know you can’t come with us, so you can chose between Abby and Ducky until I come back to take you home.” 

“He can stay in my office, Gibbs.” Director Vance’s voice sounded next to Tony’s desk. 

“You sure about that?” Gibbs stayed low next to Tony. 

“Miss Sciuto is at court testifying today and I believe Doctor Mallard got called out by one of the other teams to a homicide scene. He’ll be comfortable upstairs.” Vance turned to face Gibbs’ second in command. “You’re more than welcome there, Agent DiNozzo.” He made sure that the people around the bullpen heard that he still addressed the man on his proper title. He knew most people were still in the dark on what Tony did while he was away, but that had to be rectified as soon as possible. 

Tony met Gibbs’ gaze before he looked up at the Director. “I don’t want to be a burden, Director. I could take a cab and go back home.” 

“Nonsense, you can wait in my office.” Vance straightened his tie. “I’ve got a meeting in MTAC, but I’ll meet you there in a while. He turned and faced Gibbs. “Get those bastards and bring them in, Gibbs.” 

“Planning on doing just that, Leon.” Gibbs looked over his director’s shoulder as the aid from legal services stepped into the bullpen. “That my warrant?” 

“Yes, Agent Gibbs.” The aid held out the warrant and with a quick nod of the head disappeared again. 

“Let’s get going, McGee.” Gibbs checked his weapon before he turned for a last time to Tony. “Keep off that leg of yours, and stay safe.” He leaned in and touched his forehead with Tony’s. “Love you, Tony.” 

Tony caught Vance’s eye and managed to blush when he saw the director grinning at Gibbs’ words. “Love you too, Jet.” 

“Good, keep it that way.” Gibbs grinned. “Keep him safe, Leon.” He hurried after McGee who held the elevator open. 

“I’ll watch his six, Gibbs.” Vance replied, his voice echoing through the large area for everyone to hear. “Let’s get you upstairs and settled in. I know Gibbs’ temper and believe me, I don’t want to be on the receiving end of it.” Vance smiled softly as he helped a stunned Tony to his feet. “We’ll talk in my office, just after the meeting, Agent DiNozzo, but let me tell you this. I don’t have any problem with your relationship with Gibbs and I can tell you now, this agency will have no problem either.” 

Tony could only nod, not trusting his voice at that moment in time. 

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Gibbs made sure his Kevlar vest was secure before he checked McGee’s as well as Bishop’s. With some new infrared technology made available to them by the SWAT team, they’d managed to ascertain that there were only two people in the house, both currently in one of the back bedrooms. They’d already cleared the houses on each side in case something went wrong. Unfortunately, they still had no Intel on the identity of the occupants, except to say that it was two men. Gibbs hoped that it was O’Hare and Fleming. Gibbs gave the signal and the team moved forward. 

Gibbs was the first to reach the front door. In a loud voice he bellowed who they were and then all hell broke loose. Shots were fired from the inside even before the doors were breached. By the sounds, the two suspects had some heavy-duty artillery in their possession. Gibbs and his team stormed in, staying low to the ground as they made their way deeper into the house. It seemed like both men were just randomly firing of shots, making it difficult for Gibbs’ team to move forward. When the gunfire died down, Gibbs spoke up again. “We’ve got you surrounded. Surrender and no one will get hurt.” He remained silent. The fact that they started firing already constituted resisting arrest. 

“Fuck off, pricks!” The shout echoed through the house before gunfire once again erupted. 

Gibbs only shook his head. “Gas canister through the window.” He ordered the assault as the rest of the team inside with him geared up. They heard the windowpane explode. Heard the men as they cursed inside, before they started to cough and within moments, the door flung open and through the layers of smoke, Gibbs could make out the two figures. “Hands in the air where we can see them.” He ordered as the two men stumbled forward. However, it seemed they had other ideas. As if in slow motion both men raised their hands, not in defeat but still armed with weapons, and even before their fingers could reach the triggers both were shot down. Gibbs reached the two men first. It wasn’t necessary to check for any signs of life as both stared up, death glazed their eyes. “Make sure the rest of the residence is clean.” Gibbs ordered and stepped over the two bodies and into the room they occupied moments before. 

“McGee, get in here.” Gibbs ordered as he took in the different computers that decorated the otherwise sparsely furnished room. 

Without a word, McGee moved in behind the first computer screen and let his fingers glide over the keyboard. He continued for several moments, opening different pages that made Gibbs growl. The pages contained several images of young children, either being molested by men, or information typed underneath on their ages, their housing conditions and the possible best place from where to grab them. “They were in contact with Carmichael, Gibbs.” McGee pointed to one of the pages he’d opened. 

Gibbs looked at the page. It seemed like yet another chat room. “Is it still active?” 

“Looks like it. They became sloppy, Boss. They should’ve closed their chatting history. Looks like they planned to talk again later tonight. Just not sure about what.” McGee explained what he read. 

“Can you trace them?” 

Tim shook his head. “Not at the moment, Gibbs. It needs to be live.” 

“When will that be?” 

McGee shook his head. “Not sure, Carmichael said he would come back to them later.” McGee cocked his head. “If I read this correctly, Boss and I are sure I’m doing just that, then Carmichael is here in D.C., Boss.” 

“You sure about that?” 

“Positive, Boss.” 

Gibbs nodded his head. “Do we need to move all of this to Abby’s lab; do you need to work here?” Gibbs looked at the different computers and camera equipment stacked around. 

“I’ve got the address; we can pack all of this in as evidence, Boss. I can work from anywhere.” McGee explained quickly. 

“What about that thing of locking the IP address and then knowing where you are?” Gibbs frowned and didn’t notice the look of wonder of McGee’s face. 

“Looked like they were paranoid, Boss. It’s specifically blocked, so if we continued doing that, Carmichael would not know the difference.” 

“Then do what you have to do. If we can get Carmichael tonight, it would be the perfect day.” 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%202_zpsbakn532b.jpg.html)

“It’s the only way, Gibbs.” Tony’s voice was soft, but still laced with anger and frustration. 

“No, we’ll find another way.” Gibbs paced the room knowing that trying to stare Tony down would not work. “I told you before, we’re not doing it your way.” 

“Then what other way, Gibbs? We only have a few hours. If we do not use this opportunity, Carmichael will disappear again and we’ll be left with nothing.” Tony tried to reason. 

“Not nothing, Tony.” 

Tony snorted. “Yes, Gibbs. Nothing. We have two dead perps - that’s of no help. The final piece of the puzzle we thought we had over at Leavenworth committed suicide, not because we sniffed him out, but because he got nervous with Liston on death’s door and decided to take the fool’s way out. Then let’s not forget Liston in the meantime followed suit and died. Then we’ve got four dead children buried out in the middle of nowhere and can’t reach them, because we have no idea where they took me to dig that fucking grave! Or, are you counting the video of me out there being fucked and tortured as something, because then you’re right, then we do have something. Would you like my autograph?” 

“GENTLEMEN,” Vance’s voice thundered through the office. “I think that is quite enough. We will not resolve this issue in such a manner.” He turned to address Tony first. “You are very close to being guilty of insubordination. Tread carefully, Agent DiNozzo.” Not giving Tony a chance to respond he fixed his attention on Gibbs. “Agent DiNozzo has been your second in command for many years, and you’ll have to agree he’s the best at this kind of thing. Unfortunately, for us he’s the only option available, and trust me when I say, I hate this every bit as much as you, but we cannot let Carmichael slip through our fingers. We need him to tie Preacher to all of this. Agent DiNozzo therefore will make contact with Carmichael, he will see how long he can keep him online and hopefully we’ll be able to pin him down this time.” Vance took a step back and looked at the two men he just chastised. “Do I make myself clear?” 

Gibbs remained silent. “Gibbs?” Vance asked again. 

“Understood, Director.” Gibbs refused to make eye contact with either man in the room. 

“Agent DiNozzo?” 

“Yes, Director.” Tony replied as he came to his feet. He hobbled over on his crutches to the door, exiting without looking back. 

Gibbs bowed his head and tried to follow, but stopped when Vance spoke up again. 

“He’s got a lot of anger still inside of him, Gibbs.” 

“I know, Leon and he’s got every right to be angry. But this – this is not going to help him.” Gibbs sighed. “You’re not there when it gets dark and the memories return, or when he’s plagued with nightmares.” 

“You’re right, I’m not there but you are, Gibbs. Don’t give up on him, because not letting him do this, is not saving him, it’s showing to him that you feel he can’t do his job, that he’s just a hinder. We both know that’s not true.” 

“Since when have you become so insightful?” Gibbs grinned as he turned to exit the door. 

“Since I became both mother and father own home. Support him, Gibbs, because for whatever reason, that man loves you.” Director Vance waved Gibbs out with his hand. “Enough of all of this emotional stuff get out of here and get that slimy bastard.” 

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Tony sighed as he closed the last page of the transcripts McGee created from the conversations Reggie, Zach and Carmichael had. It made him sick to the stomach when he realized that they were talking about possible new targets, but it also made him worry about the missing twins Gibbs told him about. Carmichael bragged about the children he took, and for him to be silent regarding them made him worry that they might be dead. 

“Tony?” Gibbs asked concerned as Tony stared into space not even blinking once. “Tony,” he placed his hand on Tony’s shoulder and squeezed it once. He sighed in relief when Tony looked up and caught his gaze. “You okay?” 

“Yeah, I was just thinking about the missing twins. Carmichael’s not saying anything about them.” Tony sounded tired. 

“Maybe you’ll get him to talk about them tonight.” Gibbs replied, although he hoped Carmichael didn’t mention them at all. Not because he didn’t want to know if they were still alive, but having to put Tony through that bastard’s hours upon hours of explanation on what he did to the children, or even telling them they’re dead would devastate all of them, but more importantly it would crush Tony to pieces. 

Tony looked at his watch. “It’s time.” He locked onto the site and sat back taking some deep breaths. It was only himself and Gibbs in the room. McGee set up next door to start tracing the place where Carmichael might be. They had teams at a ready all over the place. Tony knew Gibbs planned to go with if the address was near them. He wanted nothing more than to go with them, but with the bulky cast still on his leg, he would only be a hinder and wouldn’t be able to watch Gibbs’ six. 

The icon blinked on the screen and the little alarm pinged to indicate Carmichael was online. Tony kept the transcripts next to him to have a basis of what words to use and then he started chatting. He was aware of Gibbs next to him and that he’d informed McGee to make sure they got the address as quickly as possible. 

_‘Tell me again.’_ The message appeared on Tony’s screen. 

“What does he mean? Tell him about what?” Gibbs growled. 

Tony took a deep breath. “He’s asking about me, what they’ve done to me.” 

Gibbs frowned. “How do you know that? There’s nothing in this about that.” 

“He’s making sure he’s talking to the right people. You remember, he was always this paranoid.” Tony didn’t add that Carmichael also got off on being retold certain things as he used his imagination and his right hand to place himself in the picture. 

_‘You broke your copy, need another one? Special price for returning customers.’_ Tony typed and held his breath. 

“How do you know he has a copy of the video?” 

“He would’ve insisted on one and I know that Reggie would’ve gone on and on about how they recorded everything. When I was with them he spent hours in front of his laptop looking at porn, editing stuff he’d recorded from months ago, cutting it into different segments to distribute.” Tony kept his eyes on the screen. 

“Why’s the speech pattern different here?” Gibbs remembered reading other chats before and the abbreviations were plenty, now most of everything was typed out. 

“Because we’re not trying to pick up children. When you’re looking for teenagers, you’ll use their method of texting even though you’re on a laptop or computer. It’s called text-speak and there’s sexting. Here it’s easier to be yourself as we’re all about the same age and thus do things about the same.” Tony explained quickly. 

“Like that _53X_ thing I’ve seen somewhere?” Gibbs frowned as he tried to remember where. 

“Correct, it stands for sex.” Tony relaxed, as Carmichael seemed to accept the joke even though Carmichael didn’t bring up the fact that Tony was not dead. He also didn’t ask about what they were doing to resolve the problem. Tony knew Carmichael would not take a chance to talk about something like that over the net. For that he would use other means of communication. Soon they were chatting on different things they’ve seen; Tony had all of the sites addresses Reggie and Zach used opened and could switch between them and quickly find out what Carmichael was talking about. 

Gibbs sensed the moment the mood in the room changed. He didn’t need to look at Tony to know that things were taken a notch up. “Talk to me, DiNozzo.” 

Tony shook his head but concentrated on the screen in front of him. Gibbs growled and moved closer to read the screen. Most of what Tony typed was not making sense but then he saw that both men’s typing style has changed. “There’s a fucking kid on here and that bastard is trolling him.” Gibbs bristled with anger. 

“I know that, Gibbs.” Tony’s voice was flat. He couldn’t warn the kid and if he didn’t act in the manner Carmichael expected of him they would lose the man. “Tell McGee to hurry on up with that search.” He could only look on as Carmichael chatted the kid up. By what the boy told them he was about thirteen years, lived in Virginia, had a younger sister and his mother is a single parent. It took less than five minutes to get all of that out of the boy. When Carmichael moved on to dodgier topics Tony shouted. “NO, no, no!!! Fuck, no!!!!” He dragged his hand over his face. His hands shook as he opened another search engine and started searching, soon he went into the underbelly of the net and pulled up dodgy images. “Forgive me,” he muttered under his breath as both he and Carmichael started showing the kid images of people engaged in sexual acts. “Just get scared and get off this site!” Tony yelled out in frustration. He couldn’t go right out and post a clip or video of the dark stuff; you never did that on first contact. You just gave the kid enough to be shocked, but still interested. Making him think about things, luring him back with the promise of more. 

When Carmichael typed WTTP, Tony wanted to cry. He held his breath when the kid remained silent and prayed that Carmichael had pushed too hard too soon and that the kid fled, but then he’s hope got shattered. 

_‘You first’_

Tony shut his eyes. They were going to get final confirmation that the person on the other end of this three-way chat was Carmichael. He had a specific image he used for himself. Tony had seen the image plenty of times before in those initial 3 weeks when he first chased after the pedophile; it wasn’t something he’d ever forget. When he opened his eyes, he closed them again. It was the same image. It was of a dorky teen with zits on his face, a huge smile, light grey eyes and a mop of blond hair. It was a full-length photo; the image hand held his junk in his hand as he looked straight into the camera. 

“Tony?” Gibbs spoke up next to him. “McGee traced his location, it’s in Anacostia, I’m heading out with the team. ETA fifteen minutes.” 

“I’ll keep him on line.” Tony answered resigned. 

Gibbs shook his head. “Not necessary. He doesn’t know we’re on to him. Sign off and get some rest. We’ll be back as soon as possible.” 

Tony shook his head. “Keep in touch, I’ll keep him talking.” He didn’t look up from the screen as Gibbs exited the room, he didn’t want to, but knew he had to. They had to make sure Carmichael stayed put. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%202_zpsbakn532b.jpg.html)

“He still on line, Tony?” McGee asked as he placed his phone on speaker and Gibbs brought the vehicle to a halt a few houses away from where they thought they had Carmichael. 

_“Positive, still chatting.”_ Tony’s voice sounded through the tiny speaker. They didn’t need to see him to know he was taking it hard. 

“Sign off, DiNozzo.” Gibbs barked out the order. “Get some rest.” 

_“Yes, Gibbs.”_ Tony ended the call and Gibbs sighed. He had a feeling that Tony would not move away from the computer until Carmichael disappeared from the chat room when he realized they stormed the house. There was nothing he could do about it now, except to hope that Tony would be okay. 

“Get hold of Abby, I know she’s still busy in her lab. Let her get Tony out.” Gibbs knew he was playing dirty, but Tony wouldn’t refuse Abby anything and she would make sure he was all right until they got back. 

“On it, Boss.” McGee sent Abby a quick text and smiled when she responded that the mission was on. “Done, Boss.” He reported. 

“Good, let’s do this.” Gibbs got out of the vehicle, waited for the rest of the tactical team he brought along, as he didn’t want Carmichael to slip through their fingers. They proceeded to the house in question and quickly took up position. Gibbs gave the signal and the door was kicked in. Gibbs was first in through it and heard Carmichael curse before a door slammed shut near the back. He received no word that Carmichael escaped via the back and it meant that he most likely decided to barricade himself inside. Gibbs shook his head; he couldn’t believe it was happening again. The team moved carefully through the house, making sure that it was clear until they finally reached a closed door in front of them. It looked like it was barricaded. 

“Jonathan Carmichael - NCIS. You’re under arrest. Unlock the door; come out slowly, hands in the air.” Gibbs yelled through the door and waited for a response. He received nothing. 

Gibbs tried again. “Come out with your hands above your head. If you do not comply we will break this door down and take you down with the necessary force.” 

Gibbs raised an eyebrow when Carmichael started to laugh through the barricaded door. “Agent Gibbs, what a surprise. Long time no see. “Is Agent DiNozzo with you?” He laughed again. “I must say, he sure has many lives. I thought that by this time he’d used up all of them, but it seemed I was wrong, doesn’t it?” 

Gibbs remained silent. He was not about to discuss Tony with Carmichael. Instead, he repeated his order and bit hard down on his tongue when Carmichael laughed again. 

“I don’t think so, Agent Gibbs. Why don’t you come in and get me?” 

“You don’t want us to do that. Give it up, it’s over.” Gibbs tried reasoning again. He’d already given his team a signal to see if they could find another way into the room. He wanted to growl with anger when the answer came back that there was none. The windows had been removed and the area was cemented shut. The barricaded door was the only way in or out. A real hidey-hole. Gibbs called McGee over and wrote one word on a piece of paper. He saw McGee wanted to ask questions but he shook his head. He waited for the junior agent to move away before he addressed the holed up man again. “We will blow this place up to get to you, Carmichael. Just give up and come out.” 

“Never Agent Gibbs never!” Carmichael shouted and the team ducked as shots sounded from the other side. They all ducked instinctively, but it seemed like the walls were also reinforced as none of the shots pierced the wall, although by the sound of the weapon discharged it was a fairly large caliber. 

Gibbs pulled his team back and waited for McGee to come back. He didn’t have to wait long. When the man appeared with the explosive expert of the SWAT team on his heels, Gibbs used whispered tones to explain what he needed. The expert grinned and headed out again. Within a few minutes, the door was rigged to Gibbs’ specifications and he was ready to blow it off of its hinges. “We’ve rigged the door, Carmichael. Give up or we’ll come blowing in.” 

“Do you think you’re the big bad wolf, Agent Gibbs?” Carmichael snorted. “You’re nothing but a squealy little piglet. I’ll be the one to come and blow your house away. Or even better, I’ll let you watch when I make Agent DiNozzo go on his knees and blow me good. Wouldn’t you like that? Or are you still hiding your own feelings for him?” He laughed again. “Cat got your tongue, Gibbs? Thought you hid it well? I have news for you. I’ve seen it since I first met the two of you. But you’re a coward by nature, Gibbs. You will never act on it. You’d rather pine away than admit you’re in love with a man. And DiNozzo, we’ll he’s just as pathetic isn’t he? Used by his daddy. Did he ever tell you, Gibbs? Did he confide in you or are you shocked with what I’m telling you now?” 

“Blow the door.” Gibbs had heard enough. They were through the door even before the dust could settle down. Gibbs was once again at the front and as they entered, he stood face to face with a monster that should’ve never walked free. “Hands in the air, down on your knees.” Gibbs ordered again. 

Carmichael grinned. “I loved watching that video of him, Gibbs. Tell him he was a real star.” Carmichael brought the weapon up in a single motion, but even as he took aim, Gibbs’ shot took him down and he slumped to the floor. The dark red pool of blood around his head indicated that he was dead. 

Gibbs stood back. “Secure the scene, McGee.” He placed his weapon back in the holster and moved out of the room. It was over. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%202_zpsbakn532b.jpg.html)

“Gibbs, Gibbs, Gibbs.” Abby came flying around the corner, running straight into Gibbs’ arms when they returned almost three hours later. “You’re all right, I was so scared.” 

“I’m fine, Abby.” Gibbs gave her a kiss on the cheek as she stepped away. 

“We’re all fine, Abby.” McGee piped up from the side. 

“I know that, Timmy. I spoke to you after everything went down, remember? But I didn’t speak to Gibbs, I didn’t know if my Silver Fox was indeed all right.” 

“I told you, he was all right. That was the first thing you asked, remember?” Tim huffed with annoyance. 

“Abby,” Gibbs spoke up before she could. “Something specific that you wanted?” 

Abby beamed. “Yes, there is. The missing McCarthy twins have been found.” 

“What? Where?” Bishop and McGee both asked together. 

“Turns out that Navy Lieutenant Clara McCarthy was not the twin’s birth mother. They used a surrogate mother. No one checked up on her, because the last time anyone heard anything from her, she’d moved to Europe. No one would’ve suspected anything if it wasn’t for the fact that by a bizarre coincidence, Commander Neil McCarthy went to fetch his in-laws at the airport and there he ran into her and with her, she had his two sons. She was arrested on the scene and the Commander was reunited with his sons. The boys are unharmed.” Abby beamed. 

Gibbs huffed with annoyance, but at least the children were safe. He looked over to where Tony was sitting at his desk. He was still quite pale and by the lines around the corners of his mouth, he was in some pain as well. Gibbs knew he had a lot to make up to his second in command. They no longer had the luxury of going home to stew in silence. They were now together and that meant they had to work it out. He grinned to himself. When he and Shannon got married, one of Shannon’s rules was never to go to bed angry – he assumed that in most households it was a standard rule, but it was one rule she quickly changed. It was one rule he never shared with anyone before, but he had a feeling Shannon would not mind if he shared it with Tony. 

“Go home people; report back at 08:00.” Gibbs looked on as his team scrambled to get away. He sighed when he noticed Tony did not attempt to move. “You planning on staying here all night?” 

“Not sure if I was welcome at your home, Gibbs.” Tony replied sullenly. 

Gibbs lowered his head and closed his eyes for a second. “It’s our home, Tony, not only mine. And you’ll always be welcome.” He leaned forward and cupped Tony at the back of the head, drawing him closer. “We’ve butted heads before, Tony and we will again, but it doesn’t mean that we don’t love one another anymore. Let’s go home, let’s go and talk this through.” Gibbs grinned. “It’s time I told you about another rule. One that I think should become our primary rule.” 

Tony looked at the man he loved. He was dead tired, his body ached, and yet, he couldn’t help but to want to curl up with his gruff marine and just be held close, but Gibbs was right, they had to work things out. “Are you sure we don’t have enough rules already, Boss?” 

“I think there’s still space for one more. Especially now that Rule#12 is no longer applicable.” Gibbs helped Tony to his feet and pulled him closer, holding him tight. “You did good, DiNozzo.” 

“Told you it would work.” Tony smiled but then sighed. “But it was tougher than I thought it would be.” 

“And that’s what had me so worried.” Gibbs picked up Tony’s backpack and swung it over his shoulder. “Let’s go home, Tony.” 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%202_zpsbakn532b.jpg.html)

“You just made my day, Jethro.” Tony grinned as his partner passed him a beer. 

“Just don’t let Ducky hear about this. But you deserve this one, Tony.” Gibbs took his seat next to Tony on the couch. He felt dead tired, but still satisfied. Yes, Carmichael was dead and they didn’t have the chance to bring him to justice again, but he would never be able to hurt another child ever again. The fact that they now had nothing against Preacher, made it a bit more difficult to swallow, but overall a good day. Gibbs made himself comfortable on the couch and then helped Tony to move in between his legs so that Tony rested against his chest. “Think you’ll be able to sleep tonight?” 

Tony shook his head. “Don’t think so. Thought that maybe we could go down to the basement and I could watch you work on the boat.” 

“And have Ducky kill me when we get into the office tomorrow morning and you look like a washed out rag.” Gibbs shook his head. “We’ll get some sleep.” 

“I don’t want to take anything to sleep, Gibbs.” Tony tried to push up, but settled back against Gibbs when the older man placed a bracing hand on his chest. 

“I’m not going to force anything down your throat, but I think just relaxing on the bed, instead of sitting on the hard uncomfortable stairs would make it easier on your body and maybe you’ll get some sleep in that way.” 

“Can we then stay here?” 

“We can.” Gibbs agreed to the proposal. He was comfortable and he knew Tony was comfortable as well. 

“You still want to talk about what happened today?” Tony asked and held his breath. He was still upset in a way and just wanted to forget about everything. 

“It’s difficult for both of us, but we’ve decided to talk things through, Tony and this is one thing that we really need to talk about.” Gibbs cleared his throat and took another swallow of his beer. “Most people or married couples make this rule that they would never go to bed angry, and in some instance it works, but in most cases – it doesn’t.” A smile appeared on Gibbs’ face. “When Shannon and I got married she had that rule as well, but there was one problem. She was a redhead and I had a temper. Both of us were as stubborn as asses and that meant not one of us wanted to start talking to clear the air. On more than one occasion, we just sat and stared into space, until the sun rose and then we would go our separate ways for the day. So we never went to sleep angry at one another because we never got any sleep. Then Shannon came up with another rule.” Gibbs chuckled. “Always go to bed naked.” 

Tony who had taken a sip of his own beer spit it all out and coughed hard. He nodded his head in thanks as Gibbs helped him to sit up straight and with a few taps on the back, he felt better. “Warn a guy next time, Jethro.” 

“You okay?” Gibbs asked concerned. 

“Fine, Jet. The beer just went down the wrong way.” Tony shook his head. “Always go to bed naked. I have to say, I like that rule.” 

“I know you would.” Gibbs smiled. “But it’s not as easy as it sounds. We still had to talk things out. But as we cleared the air and sorted our issues out, both of us would lose a piece of clothing. The idea was that in the end when everything had been sorted out, both parties were naked and then the best part happened.” 

Tony grinned. “It’s like strip poker, but mixed with make-up sex.” He cocked his head. “I would’ve liked your Shannon, Jethro.” 

“I think the two of you would’ve driven me up the walls.” Gibbs took a deep breath. “Are you willing to give it a try?” 

“Are you saying we’re having sex tonight?” Tony asked with a glint in his eyes. 

“You’re up for it?” Gibbs asked and then rolled his eyes as Tony looked down to his lap. 

“So up for it, Jethro.” Tony laughed as the expected slap landed at the back of his head. “If we take it slow, I’ll be all right.” He’d already spoken to Brad about being intimate with Gibbs and about the injuries he’d sustained due to the torture he suffered. Although he’d seen the video of what was done to him, he still couldn’t remember what had happened. Brad was of the opinion that he never would, something that he was totally happy with. He knew Gibbs would take good care of him and would back down when things became difficult. He wanted to try it. 

Gibbs looked pensive but he nodded his head. “Then we’ll take it slow.” He pushed Tony up and away from him. “Part ‘B’ of this rule, unfortunately states that we’re to have no physical contact with one another while things are sorted out.” 

Tony sighed. “That part sucks!” 

“Only if you want to”, Gibbs replied tongue in the cheek and grinned when Tony realized just how he interpreted the words. 

“Pervert.” Tony got serious as he moved to the other side of the couch. “May I start?” He wanted this to work; both men needed this to work. 

Gibbs nodded and waited for Tony to speak up again. 

Tony took a deep breath. “I have more than twenty years of investigative experience under my belt. When you shot my idea down this morning, it felt like you’re saying that my experience doesn’t count for anything. I am your second in command, Jethro. I do know what I’m doing.” 

Gibbs picked his words carefully. “You know I’m a stubborn bastard, but I’m also a possessive one. Seeing you getting hurt during this case brought my possessive, and my protective side to the forefront. I will not apologize for any of that, but I do agree, I disregarded your experience and I should’ve given you an opportunity to pitch your plan without shooting it down from the start.” 

“What do we get rid of first?” Tony asked as an indication that the first obstacle had been overcome. “Because this was something big, I don’t think something like a shoe or a sock would do.” 

Gibbs smiled. “I agree, this was big. What about shirts?” He laughed as Tony reached for his, not even waiting for him to complete his sentence properly. 

With both shirts discarded to the side, Tony spoke up again. “Your turn.” 

Gibbs took a deep breath and proceeded to tell Tony his first concern of the day. “Vance was correct, your attitude did come very close to insubordination and although we’re now in a relationship, I am still your senior at work and you need to respect that. Especially in front of our junior team members.” 

Tony bowed his head in shame. “I was just so angry, but you’re right and Director Vance was also right. I had no right to speak to you in such a manner. I do apologize for it.” 

Gibbs closed the gap between them. “Think we can remove something big again.” He placed a soft kiss on Tony’s lips. 

“Thought we needed distance to do this.” Tony smiled. 

“And I thought that you might need help in getting those pants of yours down.” Gibbs palmed Tony’s crotch, and groaned as he could feel Tony getting hard for him. 

“Jethro”, Tony gasped. “Why do I think you and Shannon did not really get to talk everything through?” He lifted his hips as Gibbs pulled his jeans down over his hips. 

“That’s because just like we’ve done now, we tended to get right to the problem, meaning that the big things were discussed first and then we just stripped one another before as you eloquently put it before had make-up sex.” Gibbs tossed Tony’s trousers over his shoulder and reached for his own. 

“Eloquently, Jethro?” Tony grinned. “You’re a man of large words tonight.” 

Gibbs leaned in and nipped hard at Tony’s bottom lip. “Do you want to deal with another issue or can we continue what we’re busy with?” 

“Issue, what issue?” Tony hummed in pleasure as Gibbs kissed his neck and slowly moved down his body. 

Soon both men were naked and panting hard. One touch lead to another, but Gibbs made sure to keep it slow. Once or twice he could feel Tony stiffen up just for a second or two and knew instinctively that there would be no sex tonight, but he had no problem with what they were doing right now. If it lead to Tony getting even more relaxed and even be able to doze off then even the better. 


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 10**

**Three weeks later**

Tony stretched out and sighed as he was pulled deeper into his lover’s arms. He sighed again and looked up to kiss Jethro hard. “I love you, Jet.” 

“I love you too, Tony.” Gibbs turned their bodies so that he covered Tony’s body with his. He smirked as he could feel Tony’s cock react to the movement and as they kissed, he reached between their bodies and found what he was looking for. It had taken a while before Tony relaxed enough for them to take their relationship further than mere touches. Now he couldn’t think of anything better than to sink into Tony’s responsive body and make love to him. 

“So responsive, so sensual.” Gibbs murmured against Tony’s skin as he stroked Tony’s erection, loving the way it grew hard in his fist. 

Tony gasped and widened his legs as Gibbs’ talented fingers played with his cock, his hand gliding up and down his shaft, his thumb nudging that sensitive nerve on the underside of the head before using his nail to scrape the slit itself, making Tony squirm and shudder at the same time. “Fuck,” he shivered as his cock jerked hard, already his cock was leaking pre-cum freely, he could feel Gibbs smearing it around the head, making him slick, making him ache for more. 

“That’s the plan”, Gibbs snickered and arched his back as Tony’s lips closed over his left nipple. He’d always had a sensitive chest, something that Tony found out about quickly and made a point of it to drive him up the wall with the touches, licks and little nips he dealt out frequently. 

Tony rolled their bodies and leaned back to straddle the man beneath him. “Want to ride you.” His eyes were blown with lust, but it still didn’t take away the dark circles that showed of too little sleep. 

Gibbs grunted in pleasure, his arms traveling up and down Tony’s body, still worried about the thinness to it. “You gonna get yourself ready for me?” He loved watching Tony prep himself, letting his long slender fingers slip inside of him, riding them as he stretched himself for Gibbs’ cock. 

Tony shook his head. “Want to feel you.” He leaned in and nipped at Gibbs’ bottom lip, plunging his tongue inside as Gibbs granted him entrance. The shared kiss was hard, filled with teeth and tongue, until Gibbs grabbed hold of Tony’s hair and pulled him back. Both men panted hard. “Don’t want to hurt you.” 

“You’ll never be able to.” Tony responded as he leaned in and kissed Gibbs again. He shivered as Gibbs found the scars on his back. They were still sensitive and in the beginning, he didn’t want Gibbs to touch them, but now he only thought of pleasure when Gibbs placed his hands on him. 

Gibbs fumbled for the lube and the condoms. He couldn’t help but to smile at the thought of the first time they had been together. Both men had to be satisfied with mutual hand jobs as the condoms Gibbs had was well past its expiration date. Now the condoms were new, made of different textures and some even flavored. Tony loved them all. “Glove me up.” He managed to gasp out the words as Tony’s hand encircled his shaft and jerked him hard. “If you keep on doing that, it’s going to be a while before I can actually take you.” 

Tony smirked. “Won’t let that happen, just love playing with you.” It also helped him stay in the present. Hearing Jethro’s sounds, seeing his body reacting to his touches made it possible not to think of what he had to do with Liston, what he’d endured at the abandoned farm. 

Gibbs arched again, his own hands found Tony’s straining erection against his stomach and played with it in tandem to the actions Tony had going on with his cock. His eyes shone with love and lust as Tony gasped hard when his thumb pressed into the tiny slit at the top of the head. “Want to get you a piercing right here.” He pushed his nail in again. 

“FUCK!” Tony let go of Gibbs’ cock and grabbed hold of the base of his own. “You’ll make me come with words like that.” 

Gibbs pulled Tony’s hand away. “Want to make you lose it, want to see you ride me, getting hard again as I slam into you. Want to see you come undone for a second time.” His hands were sure as he stroked Tony hard, his thumb continued to play with the slit, making Tony quiver with pain and pleasure, mixed up so that the one couldn’t be differentiate from the other. “Come for me, Tony.” 

Tony leaned back and came hard. His seed spilled hot between them, covering his chest, Gibbs’ hand and stomach as the pearly ropes splattered down. He heaved hard, riding through the orgasm Gibbs pulled from him. 

“So stunning, so beautiful.” Gibbs words penetrated his mind as Tony floated down from his high. 

“Want you inside of me”, Tony gasped for air as he finally placed the condom over Gibbs’ rock hard cock and used a bit of lube to make the access into him smooth. He lifted his hips, took Gibbs’ shaft in his hand and guided it to his puckered opening. Both men groaned in unison as Tony pushed the head of his lover’s cock through the tight opening and then gently rocked himself up and down, taking Gibbs deeper and deeper every time. 

“So tight, so hot.” Gibbs moaned but still made sure that Tony’s body adjusted to his girth. His breath hitched as Tony rolled his hips before he slowly started to move up and down on Gibbs’ cock. Gibbs placed his hands on either side of Tony’s body, kneading Tony’s hipbones deeply. He spread his thighs making Tony gasp in pleasure as Tony slid down just that little bit further. “Harder”, Gibbs ordered and grabbed Tony tight, pushing and pulling down up and down, making their flesh slap against each other. 

Tony grabbed for his cock, and moaned as Gibbs’ hand pushed his hand away. “Need to touch.” 

“No touching. Want you to come undone just like this.” Gibbs’s hips pistoned and both men moaned as Gibbs’ cock slammed hard into Tony’s prostate, making the man on top clinch down hard. 

The pace sped up before Gibbs held Tony fast, making Tony slow down again. “Nice and slow, take me down all the way, want you to sit tight on me, just like that, no moving.” Gibbs could feel Tony shiver with need, he could feel his own cock pulsating with the need to erupt, but he kept Tony seated on top of him, wanting Tony to give up, to really feel the connection between them. “Mine,” he whispered the word soft as he traced Tony’s abs with his fingers, making the muscles jump at the feather light touch. 

“Please, Jet, need to move, please.” Tony begged as the feeling inside of him grew, making him hunger for more. 

“You close?” Gibbs asked as he let his finger glide over Tony’s cock, which had hardened again. 

“Yeah, close. Please, please.” Tony rolled his hips again and sighed in contentment when Gibbs let him do that. 

“Hands behind your head, interlock your fingers.” Gibbs’ eyes traveled up Tony’s body, taking in every mark, every scar on Tony’s body. “All of this belongs to me. No one will ever hurt you again.” He whispered the words as he let his hands travel all over Tony’s body. He reached behind the man seated on top of him and squeezed his ass hard. “My bubble butt.” He smiled as Tony snickered hard. “Ride me.” 

Tony rose up, feeling a bit wobbly with his hands behind his head, but Gibbs’ hands steadied him and he quickly found his rhythm again. He rose and fell taking Gibbs deep within him, feeling the burning sensation and hardness of his lover’s cock filling him up, making him to want more. He increased his speed, Gibbs still guiding him up and down as his second orgasm approached fast. He could feel it in the tightening of his stomach, his sack and the pleasure that seeped into his lower back. “Need your hands, please.” He was out of breath, but held on tight as he bounced again and again. 

“No hands, just like this, Tony.” Gibbs could feel his own release fast approaching and slammed hard into the body on top of him. “Cum for me, Tony – now!” He roared as his own pleasure wave slammed hard into him, robbing him of the ability to distinguish between light and darkness, making nature taking over as he spilled into the condom, releasing his body of his seed while Tony become undone on top of him, coating them both again with his own release. 

Tony could hear himself scream as his orgasm slammed hard into him. He was aware of the fact that his body shook as he went up higher and higher, giving up and just taking what was handed out to him. His eyes rolled over in his head as he slumped forward, Gibbs’s cock still pumping deep within him. He hated the fact that they had to use condoms, couldn’t wait for the day he could feel Gibbs emptying himself inside of him. Unfortunately, they still had a few months to wait for all of his tests results, before they could go bareback. Tony sighed in contentment as Gibbs’ arms encircled him and held him close as they both finally made it down from their mutual high. 

“Love you, Tony.” Gibbs mumbled the words against Tony’s skin as he flipped their bodies so that Tony was at the bottom. He knew he had to pull out soon and get rid of the filled up condom, but for a while, he just wanted to hold what belonged to him close, to keep Tony safe. He had finally told Tony what Carmichael had said before his death. It shook Tony back, but he bounced back from that again, but now they were facing another hurdle. One that Tony had to overcome if he ever wanted to place this whole ordeal behind him. In a few hours time Tony would be doing one of the hardest things he’d ever done before. They were going to retrieve the small bodies Tony had to bury and they were going to send them home. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%201_zpsnmk5pwxb.jpg.html)

“You sure about this, Tony?” Gibbs asked as they stepped out of his truck. He looked on as the NCIS sedan with McGee and Bishop stopped behind him, followed by other official vehicles, including Ducky’s van. 

“I need to do this, Jethro.” Tony stepped into his lover’s personal space, not giving a damn who saw them and lowered his head on Gibbs’ shoulder. “I need to do this.” He whispered the words again. 

Gibbs didn’t respond, just placed a hand on the back of Tony’s head and held him close. He’d seen the sketches Tony drew of the dead children, it was the first thing Tony started to do after his memories returned. He could see each child’s face in detail as Tony sketched them over and over. They haunted him like they haunted Tony. He looked over Tony’s shoulder and appreciated the fact that the rest of the people stood back until Tony pushed back onto his heels. 

“Over there.” Tony indicated to the single building that stood on the property. Tony walked around the truck and pulled out a shovel that he swung over his shoulder. He waited for McGee and Bishop to catch up with them before he spoke up again. “I’ll show you where to shoot, McGee.” He turned to face the fourth member of their team. “Bishop, you’re responsible for sketching.” He started telling her the length and the width of the area as the three of them made their way over to where Tony indicated the mass grave would be. 

Ducky stopped next to Gibbs. “Will he be all right, Jethro?” 

“I’ll make sure that he is, Ducky.” He grabbed the second shovel and as Tony started to dig, so did he. 

The whole excavation took longer than Tony thought it would take, but also went by very fast. He saw the first piece of clothing sticking out, and lowered himself to his knees. The stench of death had grown sharp, but he blocked it out, concentrating on the task as he used his hands to uncover the dirt that hid the small bodies beneath. He was aware of McGee next to him, still taking photos, aware of Gibbs on his other side, also clearing the area with his hands, but nothing of that mattered. He could still see their small faces in his mind as he removed them from their cages, carried them to this temporary grave and made a solemn promise to each of them that he would come for them again, that he would reunite them with their families so that they could finally be laid to rest. 

Tony was unaware of the tears that streaked his face as he lifted the small girl out of the grave and held her to his chest for a second before finally lowering her into the black body bag that would take her home. 

Hardened law officials looked on with sadness at the scene that unfolded before them, men cried openly as they saw the moment Tony removed the last small body from the grave before his knees gave way and he sank into the upturned dirt. They gave the agent respect by moving away as Gibbs gathered the distraught man in his arms and held him tight. Sobs shook Tony’s body as he cried again knowing that there was nothing more he could do, but still feeling guilty about the little he had done. 

“They’re going home now, Tony. They are safe now.” Gibbs was the only one who really knew how much this had taken out of the man he held in his arms. Nights passed filled with nightmares, of Tony refusing to give up until they found the spot. It had taken them endless days driving in every direction, Tony seated next to him blind folded as they tried to find the burial spot. When Reginald O’Hare and Zachariah Fleming were taken down in a rain of bullets, the locations of the burial spot disappeared with them. It nearly drove Tony to madness. He had McGee and Bishop using different algorithms, maps, and satellite images to see if they could find the site, but nothing helped. When Tony suggested riding around blind folded, they all had thought he’d lost it. He and Tony had a huge falling out, but in the end it paid off and now the children had been found. 

Tony felt drained when he lifted his head from Gibbs shoulder and got out of the grave. “Ducky”, he called out to the ME as he walked towards the older man. 

“Yes, Anthony?” Ducky asked as he took in Tony’s appearance. It wouldn’t surprise him if Tony lost even more weight than he had after the initial ordeal. He would have to speak to Jethro; Tony needed to gain weight again. The dark, almost black circles underneath Tony’s eye spoke of sleepless nights, or nights filled with more terror than actual rest. He had given Jethro a small bottle of sleeping pills, hopefully now that this part is over, Tony might be persuaded to take one to get some rest. 

“When will you be able to release them to their families?” Tony’s eyes lingered over at the van. 

Ducky patted Tony’s arm. “I will work quickly, and by tomorrow afternoon if all goes as planned, I will release them.” He cocked his head. “You are planning on going to the families personally.” He made it a statement. 

“I need to, Ducky.” Tony dragged a dirty hand over his face. “I need to.” He turned around and started to walk away. 

Ducky sighed. “Anthony,” he called out. He waited for the younger man to turn around before he spoke up again. “You have no shame here, no guilt is to settle on your shoulders. I know you do not believe that, but trust this old man when I tell you that. You are their savior, not the demon who placed them here. That, you need to remember.” 

Tony stared to Ducky for a long time before he answered. “I didn’t do enough, Ducky. I am to blame, but maybe if their parents can forgive me, I can forgive myself.” 

Ducky caught Gibbs’ eyes and knew his friend had heard Tony’s words. There was nothing he could say, but he hoped that Jethro would be able to do something about it. Hopefully, Tony would get the forgiveness he sought, even though he didn’t need it. 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%201_zpsnmk5pwxb.jpg.html)

**Following afternoon**

Tony tugged hard on the tie that threatened to rob him of his ability to breathe. The small bodies were released to their respective families earlier and now Tony wanted to pay his last respects. He reached out and knocked on the door and waited patiently for it to be answered. The woman who opened the door nearly took his breath away. 

Gibbs saw that seeing the mother shook Tony hard and he could understand why. He’d seen the videos of the little girl while she was still alive, and although she must’ve been terrified at that time, she still was a splitting image of her mother. 

“Mrs. Peabody?” Gibbs reached for his badge and ID and held it out for the woman to see. “I’m Supervisory Special Agent Gibbs and this is Special Agent DiNozzo, we’re from NCIS.” 

The woman looked at Gibbs’ badge and then her eyes travelled over to where Tony still stood motionless next to Gibbs. “You’re the agent.” Her voice quivered and her hand trembled as she brought it up to her mouth to stifle a sob. 

Gibbs wanted to respond when a man appeared behind Mrs. Peabody. The look in his eyes told Gibbs that this was the father; he knew he had the same look in his eyes after Shannon and Kelly’s death. 

“Patricia?” The man asked as he looked at the two men. 

Mrs. Peabody spoke up first. “It’s him, Charles. It’s the agent who brought our baby girl home.” She turned around and sobbed hard into his chest. 

Charles Peabody gathered his wife against his chest but still moved them out of the way. “Come on in, please.” He held his wife close and gently shut the door behind him after they all entered the house. “Have a seat.” He indicated to the living room before guiding his still weeping wife over and made her sit on the three seater couch before taking his place next to her. 

“We’re sorry for your loss.” Gibbs spoke up again. 

Charles nodded his head. “I’ve heard it so many times already, but there’s something in your voice and in your eyes that tells me you know how this feels.” 

Gibbs looked at the man across from him. “Unfortunately, I do.” 

“Then thank you.” Charles patted his wife on the back gently. His eyes moved over to where Tony was seated. “You brought our baby girl home.” His voice was thick with emotion. “We were told that you went undercover and although we were not told much else, you were the one who found her?” 

Tony finally met the man’s gaze. He knew he had to answer. The parents were entitled to get answers, but would the answers he had for them be enough or would they blame him as he blamed himself? Tony tried to answer, but the words were stuck in his throat. He had to clear his throat a few times before he was finally able to speak up. “I was too late, I’m sorry.” 

Patricia looked up, reached out and grabbed hold of Tony’s hand. “No, you were not too late, you were on time. We realize that you only met our Sophie after she was already dead.” Patricia had to take a calming breath before she could continue. “But if you didn’t come along when you did, we wouldn’t have gotten our baby girl back. You did that, you brought her home. Thank you.” 

“You don’t blame me?” The words came out as a whisper. 

Patricia shook her head, but Charles answered. “We can never blame you, Agent DiNozzo.” He pulled his grieving wife closer to his side. “You need to stop blaming yourself as well.” He looked over to Gibbs. “I hope you will help your agent in that.” 

Gibbs smiled. “I’m working on that.” 

Charles rose from his chair, his hand gently wrapped around his wife’s. “I’ll show you out.” He squeezed her hand once before moving towards the door. He stopped when he heard his wife sob and looked on as she hugged the agent with the troubled eyes hard. He smiled when Agent Gibbs placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. 

“Do you ever forget?” 

Gibbs shook his head. “No, you don’t. It doesn’t become easier, but you learn to live with it. Get someone to talk to, and take care of what you have, don’t get stuck in the past.” 

“I will. Thank you again.” He shook both the agents’ hands again and looked on as they walked away. He turned to his wife stood next to him. “He brought her home.” 

“And we will never forget him for that.” 

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20divider%201_zpsnmk5pwxb.jpg.html)

**One week later**

“This is the last of my stuff.” Tony huffed as he placed the last box on the back of the truck. 

Gibbs grinned. “Finally, I thought we’d never get it done.” Not worried about who might be looking he pulled Tony close and kissed him hard. His cock jerked as Tony melted against them, opening up so that he could kiss him deep. 

Tony pulled away reluctantly. He would’ve rather stood on the side of the road and make out with the man who he came to realize meant the world to him, but of all the things on his bucket list, being caught on the side of the road having sex, wasn’t one so he ended the kiss. “You sure about this, Jet?” 

Gibbs smiled. “More than sure, Tony. It’s where you belong. I should’ve dragged you to my place years ago.” 

Tony laughed out loud. “Going caveman on me?” 

“Something like that.” Gibbs gave Tony another toe-curling kiss before letting him go. “Come one, let’s get going, we still need to unload all of this before the team comes on over.” 

Tony sighed. “How did it happen again?” He referred to the fact that the whole team, including Jack, Vance and his children were coming over later for dinner. 

“One word, Tony, one word – Abby.” Gibbs smiled as Tony sighed again and rolled his eyes. Abby made sure the whole office knew about Gibbs and Tony being together, she personally took on those who raised any objections and Gibbs had a fleeting suspicion that if he hadn’t intervened on one or two occasions that Abby’s threads of killing people and leaving no forensic evidence would’ve come true. The team had rallied around them and Tony had finally opened up and accepted their love. He was still plagued with nightmares and terrors of what had happened to him while he was undercover, but with the help of Kate’s sister, Doctor Rachel Cranston he was finally starting to deal with everything that had happened to him. 

Tony smiled. “How could I forget?” He laced his fingers with Gibbs. “My father called today.” 

Gibbs had to keep perfectly still. It was the first time Tony mentioned his father again since their trip to the cabin. “What did he want?” 

“I don’t know, I didn’t answer the phone.” Tony’s voice sounded small. 

“You want to talk about it?” Gibbs switched the engine off and turned to face his lover. 

Tony shook his head. “Not really, I might mention it to Rachel. I just wanted to let you know.” 

“Okay, as long as you know I’m here for you.” Gibbs kissed the top of Tony’s hand as he made a mental note to let Fornell know DiNozzo Senior was back in the country. “Let’s go and unpack. The sooner we can get rid of your guests, the sooner I can finish what I’ve started on the sidewalk.” 

Tony burst out laughing and to Gibbs it was the best sound he heard in a long time. 


	12. Chapter 12

**Epilogue**

**Four months later**

He calculated the trajectory in his head again, took into consideration the direction the wind was blowing from and the speed. He made sure that no one could see him from his position, that the route he would take to get away was clear, and then he settled in to wait. 

In the end, he had no idea how many hours he waited. Not once did his senses dull or did he become unfocused. He stayed on task and as his target appeared in his sights, he steadied the weapon, took aim carefully, and as he pressed down on the trigger he took a deep and steady breath which he exhaled as the shot sounded through the buildings. He could see through the scope that the shot was true, and even as the man’s bodyguards swarmed around him, he already policed the shell casing, picked up, locked away the rifle and made his way down the stairs and out of the back. 

He came to a halt when someone stepped out of the shadows. 

“Is it done?” 

He gave a cocky smile. “What do you think?” 

Fornell held up his hands. “Stupid question, I know.” The both looked up when they heard the wailing sounds of sirens in the distance. Fornell took the rifle case from the shooter. “I’ll take care of this.” 

“I know you will.” He started walking away, but stopped. “Preacher?” 

It was Fornell’s turn to smirk. “What do you think?” 

He smiled and then started walking again. 

“Take care of your boy, Jethro.” 

Gibbs didn’t look back, but raised a hand in acknowledgment. Between him and Fornell, they made sure that neither Senior, nor Preacher would ever be a bother to any young child again. And now - now Tony finally could start healing properly and stop hiding behind the masks he had to wear all of his life. He could finally be himself. No more bad memories to deal with, only the good ones that they would make together would remain.

[ ](http://s792.photobucket.com/user/Dont_hate_me01/media/Memories/Memories%20cover%203_zps7o0rpgjo.jpg.html)

**The End**


End file.
